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khuXBFXM8u 58M
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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/2/2016 8:16 pm

    Quoting Sexy_SandraD:
    I am thankful that I never had to make that kind of decision. At the point in my life being a mother and knowing the beauty of giving life, I am definitely pro-life, but I wouldn't force my views on others. A child needs to be wanted and loved and not all people would make good parents. Thanks for sharing your secret.
Pro-life is a lot more paletable than pro-birth.

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39lawless 55F
6871 posts
4/3/2016 5:37 am

That is a very wise quote from the nun! My parents (very much on the pro-life side) and I have had this discussion...along with my question about how can one be pro-life while also supporting the death penalty? (For the record, they are against the death penalty too so we didn't have to have a personal discussion about hypocrisy - lol).

I had an abortion when I was 18 and while I occasionally think about how old that child would be (32) I absolutely know I made the right decision. Just like I know with my daughter that I did have (unmarried, in college, when I was 22) that I made the right decision there.

It's a complicated topic. I always say I am anti-abortion but pro-choice. I know, for myself, having a child at 18 would have been an unmitigated disaster for both me and the baby. And I also knew myself enough to know that if I carried the baby to term with the idea of giving him/her up for adoption, that I wouldn't have been able to follow through.

Very thought provoking post - thank you! xoxo

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 7:08 am

    Quoting 39lawless:
    That is a very wise quote from the nun! My parents (very much on the pro-life side) and I have had this discussion...along with my question about how can one be pro-life while also supporting the death penalty? (For the record, they are against the death penalty too so we didn't have to have a personal discussion about hypocrisy - lol).

    I had an abortion when I was 18 and while I occasionally think about how old that child would be (32) I absolutely know I made the right decision. Just like I know with my daughter that I did have (unmarried, in college, when I was 22) that I made the right decision there.

    It's a complicated topic. I always say I am anti-abortion but pro-choice. I know, for myself, having a child at 18 would have been an unmitigated disaster for both me and the baby. And I also knew myself enough to know that if I carried the baby to term with the idea of giving him/her up for adoption, that I wouldn't have been able to follow through.

    Very thought provoking post - thank you! xoxo
It is a difficult topic, and the pro-choice pro-life decision is a lot easier when you are not face with a real decision.

Thank you for sharing your experience.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 7:13 am

    Quoting PassionCork:
    The quote you ended with does in fact speak volumes about 'some' who scream the loudest in that particular conversation.

    . . . I find it rather sad that whilst 'some' proclaim everyone has a right to life, their interest in protecting and nurturing those rights ends once the life begins.

    Fabulous post Khu.
It is quite the conundrum... I am my sister's unborn babies keeper, but not her or her baby's keeper.

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HermanG67 53M
8132 posts
4/3/2016 8:18 am

great post Sir!!!!


khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 8:23 am

Thanks Herman

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Annie_34 61T
5945 posts
4/3/2016 8:50 am


Bonjour Khu
Les pour et les contres . L'histoire ne finit Jamais
♥ Poton ♥ Bisou ♥ Annie ♥


Hello Khu
The pros and cons . The story ends Never
♥ Kiss ♥ Annie ♥



Notre vie est un voyage-♦-Dans l'hiver et dans la nuit
Nous cherchons notre passage-♦-Dans le ciel où rien ne luit .

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kinkyfem73 47F

4/3/2016 9:08 am

Pro choice~ pro life is a tough one.... IMO you cant judge anyones decision until you've been in those shoes.
I was once a long time ago~ luckily for me the choice was made for me.

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sexysixties2 72F  
39102 posts
4/3/2016 9:57 am

Abortion is definitely a messy subject....Trump should never have said the things he did about it. Such lack of compassion in a man who aspires to lead your country is difficult to understand.

We have had a referendum on whether abortion should be allowed in Ireland....the answer was a resounding no but there are moves to hold another one. Women need a choice...surely they have that right and they shouldn't be forced to go abroad.

Thanks for sharing your secret


"Age does not protect you from love, but love, to some extent, protects you from age."

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 9:59 am

    Quoting Annie_34:

    Bonjour Khu
    Les pour et les contres . L'histoire ne finit Jamais
    ♥ Poton ♥ Bisou ♥ Annie ♥


    Hello Khu
    The pros and cons . The story ends Never
    ♥ Kiss ♥ Annie ♥


No it doesn't Annie

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 10:11 am

    Quoting kinkyfem73:
    Pro choice~ pro life is a tough one.... IMO you cant judge anyones decision until you've been in those shoes.
    I was once a long time ago~ luckily for me the choice was made for me.
Sis, no decision would be more difficult.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 10:26 am

    Quoting sexysixties2:
    Abortion is definitely a messy subject....Trump should never have said the things he did about it. Such lack of compassion in a man who aspires to lead your country is difficult to understand.

    We have had a referendum on whether abortion should be allowed in Ireland....the answer was a resounding no but there are moves to hold another one. Women need a choice...surely they have that right and they shouldn't be forced to go abroad.

    Thanks for sharing your secret

Trump is Trump, just saying whatever sounds good, serving himself and his swollen head.

America will decide, and they will truely get the government they deserve, as the saying goes.

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NaughtyInSO 109F
9755 posts
4/3/2016 10:38 am

This discussion will never end unless "pro-lifers" realise the truth in Sister Joan Chittister's words.
I believe in choices, in free will and in every sane person's ability to make their own decisions.

There are times when abortion is the only way to save a woman's life.
There are also times when a woman was violated and I strongly support that reason for abortion.
I also support the idea of making "morning after" pills available over the counter.
That said, abortion shouldn't be taken lightly. It isn't birth-control.

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author51 57F  
100274 posts
4/3/2016 12:17 pm

    Quoting NaughtyInSO:
    This discussion will never end unless "pro-lifers" realise the truth in Sister Joan Chittister's words.
    I believe in choices, in free will and in every sane person's ability to make their own decisions.

    There are times when abortion is the only way to save a woman's life.
    There are also times when a woman was violated and I strongly support that reason for abortion.
    I also support the idea of making "morning after" pills available over the counter.
    That said, abortion shouldn't be taken lightly. It isn't birth-control.
I so agree with my counter part here...I went through something traumatic when I was 13 as my then 15 year old sister got pregnant by her boyfriend. When he found out, he was 16 he split.She and my parents weighed all the options and all agreed for her to have an abortion. Our doctor felt she was too tiny inside to even carry a baby full term. Prior to her getting the abortion we were home one night ,she went to the bathroom and then screamed in pain. I think a higher power knew that she could not carry a new life so he took the decision away from her and the fetus was in the toilet. I will never forget that night as long as I live..

She started to hemmorage and it was only my Dad, her and I home that night as my Mom was at work.

It was my father who scooped the fetus out and into his hands with tears in his eyes, me helping my sister trying to stem the flow and help her get dressed, my Dad wrapping the fetus up gently in a towel and drive my sister and the fetus to the hospital...

That is another secret I have not divulged to many people. My sister went on to have two healthy sons in her mid 20's when she was married and for me that is the way it should be done.... Get married, have kids when you are mature enough to handle the responsibilities....

I am PRO CHOICE...I do not think anyone has the right to tell a woman what they can do to their own bodies..I have also given birth to my three miracles so I like any other open minded woman here have seen both sides of the issue and we all have our own beliefs on it.

No one religion nor political party has any right what so ever to try to make it illegal and take the woman's free choice away from her....

Such a great post......

One can never have enough JOY in their life...


spunkycumfun 60M/65F  
36115 posts
4/3/2016 12:40 pm

I take my hat off to you Mr khu for blogging about abortion.
I have no children, but in my past I've partnered three girlfriends who became pregnant, presumably I had something to do with it, and all three chose to have an abortion (or as the NHS here like to call it, terminate).
I often wonder what my life would be like if one or more of them made a different decision.
At the time I was pleased they told me before they had the abortion, but I believed they had the choice and the only thing I could hope for was for them to listen to my opinion and to know I would financially support the child if born. Each time then I was pleased they opted for termination.
The debate is far more nuanced than the so-called principled extremists (loaded term I know!) of the debate like to portray.


mature_951 59F  
3346 posts
4/3/2016 2:16 pm

I believe I read in the L.A. Times that no one is "pro abortion". And I agree with that. But I also agree with RBG in that women should not be second-class citizens because of their reproductive capabilities. I am, and always will be, pro-choice.

"You can stroke people with words."


pal334 66M  
40984 posts
4/3/2016 5:44 pm

Quite poignant post. A bit of a thinker post

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 5:47 pm

    Quoting NaughtyInSO:
    This discussion will never end unless "pro-lifers" realise the truth in Sister Joan Chittister's words.
    I believe in choices, in free will and in every sane person's ability to make their own decisions.

    There are times when abortion is the only way to save a woman's life.
    There are also times when a woman was violated and I strongly support that reason for abortion.
    I also support the idea of making "morning after" pills available over the counter.
    That said, abortion shouldn't be taken lightly. It isn't birth-control.
Most of the pro-life camp will concede the life of the mother, sexual assault, (with incest being the most vile version of sexual assault)... so I can't argue that or most of your comments.

But while everyone should have the right and ability to make thier decision, there is always more than one person involved in the creation process.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 5:55 pm

    Quoting author51:
    I so agree with my counter part here...I went through something traumatic when I was 13 as my then 15 year old sister got pregnant by her boyfriend. When he found out, he was 16 he split.She and my parents weighed all the options and all agreed for her to have an abortion. Our doctor felt she was too tiny inside to even carry a baby full term. Prior to her getting the abortion we were home one night ,she went to the bathroom and then screamed in pain. I think a higher power knew that she could not carry a new life so he took the decision away from her and the fetus was in the toilet. I will never forget that night as long as I live..

    She started to hemmorage and it was only my Dad, her and I home that night as my Mom was at work.

    It was my father who scooped the fetus out and into his hands with tears in his eyes, me helping my sister trying to stem the flow and help her get dressed, my Dad wrapping the fetus up gently in a towel and drive my sister and the fetus to the hospital...

    That is another secret I have not divulged to many people. My sister went on to have two healthy sons in her mid 20's when she was married and for me that is the way it should be done.... Get married, have kids when you are mature enough to handle the responsibilities....

    I am PRO CHOICE...I do not think anyone has the right to tell a woman what they can do to their own bodies..I have also given birth to my three miracles so I like any other open minded woman here have seen both sides of the issue and we all have our own beliefs on it.

    No one religion nor political party has any right what so ever to try to make it illegal and take the woman's free choice away from her....

    Such a great post......
In you sister's case, the departure of her BF put the decision on her and her alone... but if the BF stays, the woman is capable of taking the baby to term, and the BF has a different opinion, then what?

It takes two to create the pregnancy, does one of the creators wishes supercede the other's. Messy, messy business.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 6:01 pm

    Quoting spunkycumfun:
    I take my hat off to you Mr khu for blogging about abortion.
    I have no children, but in my past I've partnered three girlfriends who became pregnant, presumably I had something to do with it, and all three chose to have an abortion (or as the NHS here like to call it, terminate).
    I often wonder what my life would be like if one or more of them made a different decision.
    At the time I was pleased they told me before they had the abortion, but I believed they had the choice and the only thing I could hope for was for them to listen to my opinion and to know I would financially support the child if born. Each time then I was pleased they opted for termination.
    The debate is far more nuanced than the so-called principled extremists (loaded term I know!) of the debate like to portray.
It's is rather complex.

You missed out Spunky... best thing I have experienced! Fatherhood.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 6:27 pm

    Quoting  :

I don't support it as method of birth control either. It is a tough topic as I said, with many variables.

As far as your past experiences with bringing BFs home, you can't pin it all on the women.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 6:34 pm

    Quoting mature_951:
    I believe I read in the L.A. Times that no one is "pro abortion". And I agree with that. But I also agree with RBG in that women should not be second-class citizens because of their reproductive capabilities. I am, and always will be, pro-choice.
The problem is, it take more than a woman to create life. So there is more to consider than a singular choice.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 6:38 pm

    Quoting  :

It is a difficult question, but it has already been decided where I reside

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NaughtyInSO 109F
9755 posts
4/3/2016 6:41 pm

    Quoting khuXBFXM8u:
    Most of the pro-life camp will concede the life of the mother, sexual assault, (with incest being the most vile version of sexual assault)... so I can't argue that or most of your comments.

    But while everyone should have the right and ability to make thier decision, there is always more than one person involved in the creation process.
So, this debate isn't about pro-life vs pro-choice as I mistakenly thought...

Yes, there is more that one person involved in creating a life. However, it's a woman's body and a woman's life. She has the majority vote in any decision that involves her body and her life. Other party may present an argument, but he doesn't have a deciding vote.
Once again, everything boils down to a woman's choice.

No one has a right to tell me or other women what to do with our bodies and our lives. It's that simple.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 6:43 pm

    Quoting pal334:
    Quite poignant post. A bit of a thinker post
You know how I like those kinds of posts Pal.

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mature_951 59F  
3346 posts
4/3/2016 7:32 pm

    Quoting NaughtyInSO:
    So, this debate isn't about pro-life vs pro-choice as I mistakenly thought...

    Yes, there is more that one person involved in creating a life. However, it's a woman's body and a woman's life. She has the majority vote in any decision that involves her body and her life. Other party may present an argument, but he doesn't have a deciding vote.
    Once again, everything boils down to a woman's choice.

    No one has a right to tell me or other women what to do with our bodies and our lives. It's that simple.
My thoughts exactly. Don't ask for discussion if you just want to express your opinion.

"You can stroke people with words."


khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 8:41 pm

    Quoting NaughtyInSO:
    So, this debate isn't about pro-life vs pro-choice as I mistakenly thought...

    Yes, there is more that one person involved in creating a life. However, it's a woman's body and a woman's life. She has the majority vote in any decision that involves her body and her life. Other party may present an argument, but he doesn't have a deciding vote.
    Once again, everything boils down to a woman's choice.

    No one has a right to tell me or other women what to do with our bodies and our lives. It's that simple.
It a two edge sword, with only 2 involved if one has the decision making ability it's a system that is flawed! To quote another commenter, control needs to use before the point of conception from consentual sex, don't you think.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/3/2016 8:51 pm

    Quoting mature_951:
    My thoughts exactly. Don't ask for discussion if you just want to express your opinion.
Questions or statements of facts are part of a discussion process, right? Or do you believe otherwise?

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NaughtyInSO 109F
9755 posts
4/3/2016 9:35 pm

    Quoting khuXBFXM8u:
    It a two edge sword, with only 2 involved if one has the decision making ability it's a system that is flawed! To quote another commenter, control needs to use before the point of conception from consentual sex, don't you think.
And again you are trying to change the subject! Or, this debate is about control suddenly?!? We jumped from 'pro-life vs pro-choice' discussion to who should make a decision about abortion, and now to "control needs to use before the point of conception from consentual sex".

I'm willing to continue discussion/debate only if we stay on one subject at a time, and leave related subjects for another day.

Just so we clear: Yes, people need to be more responsible. Yes, most unwanted pregnancies are resulted from irresponsible behavior. Who could argue with that ???

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KItkat1415 58F  
20001 posts
4/3/2016 10:12 pm

That must have been hard to think about.
I hope that writing about it helped you a little bit.
This was a powerful contribution to the symposium,
kk

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mature_951 59F  
3346 posts
4/4/2016 10:17 am

I didn't understand that this was about "creating life"; I understood that it was about a sexual experience gone awry.
When you use words like "problem" you're judging opinions/statements, which is not conducive to "discussion".
It certainly does take two for a pregnancy. But while you "felt nothing", I doubt that she felt the same.

"You can stroke people with words."


humorlife 115M
5717 posts
4/5/2016 5:21 am

Amid the sensual tales you told (and they were a lot of fun!) you managed to slip in a tough topic… and you did so with sensitivity, a little pain, and much eloquence. The quote from Sister Joan Chittister should be an important part of the abortion debate. Unfortunately, it’s vastly underrepresented.

The comments this post has engendered speak for themselves: You addressed the subject intelligently, and that’s how folks responded. You even gave a few a forum to open up with some pain. Let Trump take a lesson from you!

Great post. Apologies for coming to it late: I’m way, waaay behind on my blog reading. But this was definitely worth the wait.

Stop in, read, and offer comments at my "swinging as seen in the media" blog, "Confessions of a Lifestyle Man" humorlife, which is also the home of the monthly virtual symposium. New post: The Virtual Symposium Returns Lets Pick A Topic


kzoopair 69M/67F
25787 posts
4/5/2016 12:05 pm

This is an interesting post, Khu. I like the Icelandic model, and I agree with the nun! I'm one of the militant ones- if men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.

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sweet_VM 62F
81045 posts
4/6/2016 2:59 pm

Abortion a very difficult topic KHU. Ty for sharing with us and a gravest contribution to this symposium hugs V

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 9:26 pm

    Quoting  :

There are some many, many variables to the situation and as a society I think we should strive to lesson the negative impact on those who find themselves in this situation, (whatever part they play in it). The argument always boils down to polar regions, instead of the broader conversation.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 10:34 pm

    Quoting KItkat1415:
    That must have been hard to think about.
    I hope that writing about it helped you a little bit.
    This was a powerful contribution to the symposium,
    kk
K.K. I do thank you for a compassionate comment. In all honesty, I try not to think about, because it's just an endless cycle of "what if".

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 10:53 pm

    Quoting mature_951:
    I didn't understand that this was about "creating life"; I understood that it was about a sexual experience gone awry.
    When you use words like "problem" you're judging opinions/statements, which is not conducive to "discussion".
    It certainly does take two for a pregnancy. But while you "felt nothing", I doubt that she felt the same.
Admittedly I am not a great writer, but the post was not about "creating life" or about a sexual experience gone awry... you have coloured it that way, from the comments of other and my responses to those comments and your comments.

You have decided to take things out of context and attack words, like "problem", and then run with it. If you can't understand being blindside by something you didn't contemplate, and feeling numb, but the numbness is frozen feeling out nothingness, then I can't help you to understand how I felt. The fact that your latest comment would state to me "I doubt that she felt the same", demonstrates that perhaps my use of the term "felt nothing", cause some instant judgement on your part without fully digesting the post! Perhaps you should re-read the post, especially the part where I talk about how difficult a decision it must of been for her, even though she was firmly in the pro-choice camp.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 10:55 pm

    Quoting  :

I agree... especially the part that it is a people decision.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 10:57 pm

    Quoting humorlife:
    Amid the sensual tales you told (and they were a lot of fun!) you managed to slip in a tough topic… and you did so with sensitivity, a little pain, and much eloquence. The quote from Sister Joan Chittister should be an important part of the abortion debate. Unfortunately, it’s vastly underrepresented.

    The comments this post has engendered speak for themselves: You addressed the subject intelligently, and that’s how folks responded. You even gave a few a forum to open up with some pain. Let Trump take a lesson from you!

    Great post. Apologies for coming to it late: I’m way, waaay behind on my blog reading. But this was definitely worth the wait.
Thank you humor... I haven't read all the post either... It has been a busy work week for me.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 11:00 pm

    Quoting kzoopair:
    This is an interesting post, Khu. I like the Icelandic model, and I agree with the nun! I'm one of the militant ones- if men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.
It probably would be a sacrament... but the men who have led and the ones who choose to be led, don't always make the best decisions. Look no further than my muse for the post for confirmation of that fact.

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 11:01 pm

Thanks Annette

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/7/2016 11:02 pm

    Quoting sweet_VM:
    Abortion a very difficult topic KHU. Ty for sharing with us and a gravest contribution to this symposium hugs V
Thanks V. I hope your vacation was all it could be.

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tigger678902 53F  
4549 posts
4/25/2016 11:52 am

Excellent post - So loved the quote from the nun,...sensible woman.

Good girls go to heaven,....Bad girls go EVERYWHERE!
I love to travel

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khuXBFXM8u 58M
10302 posts
4/25/2016 3:48 pm

    Quoting tigger678902:
    Excellent post - So loved the quote from the nun,...sensible woman.
Thanks Tigger

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