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Alone verses On My Own
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You are not alone...I went through the same thing some years back. It took me years to figure out what you have done is a short time.GOOD FOR YOU....Its been 21 years this April and I still think of her every day...but with the help of family and friends you will find out that you are not really on your own..... It is a strange place....keep you head held high.....mingle with friends and set a goal for yourself to do that one thing you always wanted to do in you life.....go for it plan it and then do it.....then you will find out that you can do it .....on you own.
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I just need to figure out what that one thing is I have always wanted to do. I find myself thinking of all the things that I need to do, should do, want to do, then I overwhelm myself and end up not doing anything. The guilt of still being here without him gets to me too. I know that he would NOT want me to think of it that way and that in some way he will always be with me.
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Don't start with just that one thing.....ease into it....take that weekend trip to a spa that you always wanted.....then set another goal that you wanted to do or get.....its not guilt....its the loss of a live partner...someone that you were in touch with....21 years later I still smell her smell in the breeze....I see something that reminds me....that is her laugh....that is their way of letting you know that they are near watching over you....wanting you to be happy and full of life.
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Taking it one day at a time, that is what I am doing. Some days are better than others. You are so right, so many things remind me of him. He had a foot fetish, so just getting a pedicure, buying a pair of heels. He would always pick out my cantaloupe for me, said I didn't know how to pick the best one, and this week I had to do that myself. It is the little things that at the time didn't seem to be a big deal, but now are the things that start the tears flowing.
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Yes , your last post we DO remember you late hubby !! One hell of a funny guy too!! great fellow that seemed to do anything for anyone he could help. so sorry for your loss.
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OMG! Yes he was funny and he really did help alot of people. More than most people knew. He was like that wanted to help out without anyone knowing. I miss him everyday.
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