The private place
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Posted:May 26, 2011 1:29 pm
Last Updated:Feb 24, 2022 5:09 pm
59199 Views
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Seen so many of these have decided I want one for myself. Band wagon jumping is generally not my speciality.
If for any reason at all you want to leave a private message or comment or even just to say hello if you can't mail. Then this is the place to do so.
All is for my eyes only.
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This is your body speaking, we regret to inform you that your orgasm has been declined.
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Posted:Dec 16, 2012 8:41 am
Last Updated:Aug 7, 2018 3:30 pm
49716 Views
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I'm in two minds, I hope that I'm not the only one to suffer, but I hope that no one else suffers the same as it is god damn annoying.
Recently, yet not through lack of trying I have not been able to reach orgasm. I go from enjoying myself immensely, feeling the build up and at the final moment when you expect the release.... gone like a fart in the wind. As if someone has attached a switch and turns it to off at the very last second.
Infuriating to have this happen once, but I think my body hates me. FIVE times this happened to me (in one session) lucky me or not quite lucky me, depending on how you look at it. I got very annoyed with myself, took a little break here and there just to prevent over stimulation as my loins were getting a bit sensitive. Not often I pull away from someone playing with my clit. So with mixing between clitoral and vaginal stimulation, sometimes both but still nothing. Don't get me wrong the crescendos were frickin wonderful but in the end I was so desperately seeking the ecstatic fanfare. I couldn't even get manage to get myself off, my body was definately working against me.
My partner was worried that he was doing something wrong, HELL NO! was my response, if they were doing something wrong I wouldn't have been able to reach point of orgasm at all, let alone five times. He then started feeling guilty that he would end up coming and I hadn't.
Now I have to admit here it was years (yes years) before I had any type of orgasm during sex. Knew it was possible through masturbation but no one else had ever achieved the same result. So I had become used to sex being somewhat perfunctory, I even thought that I couldn't have an orgasm during sex. How bad is that! However irregardless of whether or not I was satisfied I did always enjoy sex. When my none self induced orgasm duck was broken.... that is when all hell broke loose. I always made sure I did my damnedest to achieve the big O, lets face it, a non self induced orgasm is much much better. Well for me it is anyway.
On my path of sexual awakening I did still encounter some men who only thought of their own satisfaction. Some men who did stuff I didn't think possible, most of the actions were stored in the must do again file of my brain.
Getting back to the point though, he need not feel guilty about my lack of orgasm, its all worth it for me just to see theirs. I do get pleasure from seeing/hearing their pleasure. I also know that once my curse is broken that the ratio will swing in my favour again.
And if it makes them feel better I have since indulged in a bit of self love and the result...
Yet again a big fat NOTHING!!!!!!!!! Yep I can't even manage one on a solo mission.
I know what I need to is not to fixate upon it, eventually my body will give in. This has happened before, just as infuriating now as it was back then. The first orgasm after that bout wasn't as amazing as you would expect considering the 'long' build up, I was actually a bit disappointed. I was expected this wonderous explosion in my loins, in reality I have had more powerful sneezes. Counted as an orgasm though, and the reset button in my brain had been triggered.
Wondering now how long it will take for my body to reset itself again, one thing is for sure. I'm going to have fun finding out!!
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The day today.... sucks major balls!!!!!
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Posted:Dec 11, 2012 2:31 pm
Last Updated:Mar 25, 2016 4:55 pm
48962 Views
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I quite often have stressful days but today has been the day from hell.
Firstly on the way to work I see some extremely poor driving habits. Some moron who rather than trying to clear their iced over windscreen, had fashioned the infamous comedic letterbox style view hole. Never ever thought I'd see that for real. Followed by another moron who tried to overtake a car that was indicating to turn right, on the right whilst said vehicle was turning right. I had already started braking in readiness of an accident.
Then within five minutes of being in work I tell my boss to fuck off. Now a new personal record.You are now wondering the reason why... in ordering replacement parts for vehicles, the priority is cheapest and quickest. Kind of obvious really. First question I get asked,
Where is this clutch?
Coming from unipart on the 11am van.
Why so late have you tried everyone else? Cars stuck on the ramp now. You've really fucked the day up now.
You can fuck off! I have tried everyone and have ordered the cheapest and the quickest. I can't magically pull one out of my arse.
You may think a bit of a harsh reply from myself but I get statements like that every day, after ten years I instinctively phone around and choose the most appropriate option. Secondly at this point the car to be repaired still had the gearbox attached, by itself a four hour job to remove to actually be ready for the clutch to be replaced. So no rush at all for the clutch to have been there first thing. No idea how he classes that as a fuck up.
Yet he still thinks I can work miracles, some items are extremely specific and if you don't want to pay new prices then a complete nightmare to source. Having just spent a week and a half trying to find such an item, with what seemed to be about every half hour him asking 'found one yet?'. Infuriating to say the least when I do also have other tasks to carry out.
So already off to a cracking start he continues to second guess me, repeats things I already know with the inference that I had forgotten to do it. Forgotten no, just on my every growing list of shit to do and will be done in time. What he doesn't realise is that if he actually left me the fuck alone then the shit would get done quicker.
He told me the same statement six times within one hour, yet didn't tell me a vital piece of information that I needed to know. Then used the excuse that I should have come to ask much easier said than done. I can't ask about something I don't know about.
When I do ask I get ignored or told to sort it out myself as thats what I'm paid to do. Surely as I'm asking its an indicator that I can't sort it out myself. Yet if I do use my initiative I get shouted at anyway and should have come and asked. The mother of all no win situations!!
He can't even manage his own time schedules yet seems hell bent in trying to control mine. Today he specifically said to a customer their car would be ready at 2.30pm. It was that time before he even started the job. Was it him that had to placate an angry customer, no that was me. My boss refused yes refused to talk to him.
I'm now mentally thinking that I've gone of on a tangent...
Anyway the guy is a complete arsehole, a money grabbing, arrogant, egotistical fucking cunt. Who loves the sound of his own voice, half of our customers knew about my sky dive before I had chance to. He has even told my mum about when I went to the doctors recently as he asked her if I was alright. Cue a very pissed off me, even I don't tell my mum about routine appointments he only knows as I have to get time off work.
And to top off my wonderfully shite day at work, I face planted the floor. Nope I didn't slip on ice I tripped over my cat. Then I put the central heating on, half an hour later realise that I can't hear the boiler. Check it, yep its on, check the valves, yep they are all on, check the main control valve OH NO FUCK NO!!!!!!!!! Luckily my house retains heat quite well but its not going to stay warm for long...
I'm going to have to ask the boss if I can borrow the spare heater, yet another bone of contention. He may be warm at work yet I'm freezing, and the fucker continually turns my heater down. Fuck that if I had my way it would be permanently strapped to my body and attached to the main gas line. I wear so many layers that I was asked if I'd put on weight. I was not impressed!!
Usually a rant helps me calm down but I'm afraid to say that presently my mood is still somewhat atrocious.
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Smile of the Cheshire Cat...
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Posted:Dec 8, 2012 2:28 pm
Last Updated:Jul 14, 2017 3:47 pm
49929 Views
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is certainly whats plastered across my face presently.
Post orgasmic bliss or what I am now calling a cum-coma is what I'm experiencing presently.
Many will know that I have a history of bad luck with meets, presently its taking a turn for the better... finally!! Having had a few repeat liasons with a new found friend, yes I said repeat. Woo!
I may in fact get a bit of a spanking for this post, but we all know that I wouldn't mind that one little bit!
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Want to see my bush?
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Posted:Dec 4, 2012 2:12 am
Last Updated:Mar 25, 2016 4:58 pm
51876 Views
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Come on..... from me what else were you expecting.
Was meant to have done this last night as a promise to friend but got caught up watching videos on utube of things we had been discussing. Excited muchly, oh yes I am!
Yes I have erected my christmas tree, complete with brand spanking new multi function lights and after finally managing to find one at Manchester christmas markets the finishing touch of a silver star tree topper. Wanted one for so long when I saw it, my reaction was like a little girl in a sweet shop.
I know it's not really that impressive, for me with little artistic talent it's bloody brilliant.
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'Virgin' on the ridiculous
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Posted:Dec 2, 2012 1:40 pm
Last Updated:Jun 18, 2016 5:23 pm
50431 Views
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I do sometimes wonder about how dumb men must think us women are. A couple of nights ago I receive a message from a 19year old who is apparently still a virgin and wanted to know if I'd take his virginity. Oh lucky me.
Not for one minute do I believe his virgin status maybe though a little lacking in sexual experience. References to his cock although backed up by picture, but made worse by saying its big for his age. If cock size really did increase as men get older then I'm definately going to start looking at older men. Phrases used especially 'sex is sex' and wanting to meet in a hotel all screamed to me this guy ain't a virgin.
When I was 19 if anyone was rumoured to be particularly well endowed he would have been fighting women off.
The main thing that ran through my mind though is, if he truly was a virgin why would he want to pick a complete stranger. Why isn't he waiting and trying to find someone to make that special moment special.
How many of us rushed into getting the proverbial cherry popped?
I started thinking about my own virginity, well when I first had sex with someone because I wanted to. Looking back, at the time no love was involved, and it just felt more like a natural progression. Would I have waited if it was truly sex for the first time, if I knew then what I know now... yes I would have.
So my fellow bloggers
Did anybody here rush? Would you have waited for the right person?
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New and improved... my arse!!!!
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Posted:Nov 19, 2012 2:33 pm
Last Updated:Dec 16, 2012 4:32 pm
48913 Views
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So log on to find that the new message centre has been forced upon me... Oh I'm not a happy girl.
When they had changed it before without my consent. I was able to change it back, this action was done very quickly. Surely this would of been quite an obvious sign that I did not like it and did not want it.
Having a quick read through the blogs I find its not only myself that doesn't like it and that the change has been imposed on everybody.
Sometimes I feel like the site owners don't give a shit about what we want and so many people were opposed and they decided to do it anyway.
Being disillusioned with this place in the past and having only recently come out from behind my comfy hiding place, I almost wanted to jack it all in again.
Does anyone know of a petition page for the old message centre to be reinstated?
Although not many used the function, at least the old messaging centre had the spell check facility. I can't even find it!!!
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Jump from a plane, no problem.
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Posted:Nov 15, 2012 12:52 pm
Last Updated:Jun 18, 2016 5:27 pm
48436 Views
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In order to raise a bit of much needed money for cancer research, I decided to do a sponsored sky dive. Bear in mind I'm not a fan of heights.... Luckily I'll have a highly qualified instructor strapped to my back.
Was originally booked for the 19th October, but due to shitty weather delays ensued and despite being there all day. I never got to jump as they don't do night time jumps. Rearranged to the first available date which was today.
After experiencing all associated nerves already whilst waiting for my first I was quite upbeat about the day and possibly foolishly thought that I'd be OK. How very wrong I was, as previously... I hadn't gotten onto the plane. Where suddenly it all becomes very real.
Whilst waiting, I said to my mum (bless her she came with me) so far today has been a comedy of errors, luckily at the end I was given a break. A good break not a broken bone.
7am - get to the parents to pick mum up, go to program my sat nav to find its given up the ghost. Fuck!! and can't borrow dads as he needed it. Double fuck!! Think no worries Northwich to Whitchurch is easy and they have supplied directions albeit somewhat shit for the exact location, an atlas in the glove box just in case. No problem. Being still dark at that time had no idea what the weather was like, all I knew it was dry.
Half way into the journey remember that said atlas was actually a Cheshire A-Z and shit... Whitchurch is in Shropshire. Been there before should be OK. Sun was coming out and the sky didn't look to great.
8am - Get there on time and didn't get lost, by this point though there was light fog. Knew already jumps would be then be delayed and I had a long wait ahead of me.
9am - Went for my safety briefing, the instructor recognised me and said 'Sorry but you do have to go through it again'. Sit myself back down for the wait.
11.30am - Small patch of blue sky spotted, might actually get to jump
12.30am - All clear given for jumps to proceed and I'm on first load, so head off to get kitted up whilst they prepped the plane. I looked like a complete clown, all in one pink jump suit matched with blue helmet. Such a sexy look.
1pm - Finally get into the plane, a whole new set of nerves is setting in, the helmet strap is triggering one of my reactions to my restricted breath phobia as it was digging into the top of my throat. Not something I had taken into account and said reaction is the continuous need to burp. Knuckle down missb and breathe deeply.... and we start taxiing for take off.
1.30pm - Disembarked the plane from the ground thanks to a fault in one of the planes backup systems which meant it was unsafe to fly. At least I got to jump out of a plane.... Engineer was called but wouldn't be there until 2.30. More waiting!!
During the wait the engineers van broke down on way, so the apprentice was called out on the emergency mission. Give them there dues they did manage to get to the airfield on time, but the decision on whether we jumped or not lay solely on getting the fault fixed.
3pm - Fault fixed WOO HOO!!!!!! Scramble to get rigs back on and checked. Back onto the plane for the second time and taxi towards runway. Success we're up the air.
By this point nerves had set back in with a vengeance, I found the ascent awful, the changes between climb to bank whilst circling the airfield sent my stomach into somersaults, all whilst trying to contain burps. At one point I looked down and thought cool we're at 10000ft already, spied an instructors altimeter and it only read 2000ft. Really, oh fuck, seriously OH FUCK we're going to get higher than this FUCKKKK!!!!!!!!!!
The ascent in all took 20mins but we had to do another circle when a helicopter was sighted in the drop zone.
During the ascent we had to move to be sat on the lap of the instructor, and your that tightly strapped together lets just say, luckily I didn't get a poke in the back. After a quick double check door opens, hear the engine lose power, first tandem jumper moves to the door, lent forward and gone in an instant. I didn't have much of a choice on being moved to the door, all my body weight was on the instructor, before I knew it all I could see was cloud. Then the voice ' hands to chest, cross ankles, head back, we're gone'...
OH MY GOD!
Fricking awesome, immense and so hard to describe. Contrary to what I thought my stomach didn't get catapulted further up my body. The wind chill when traveling at 120mph was freezing. Although I did shout on exit, a practice they advise to eliminate the gasp effect, I did try to say something and promptly shut my mouth as I instantly felt the need to be sick. Tap on the shoulder to move my arms out 20 seconds and 5000ft later, free-fall abruptly stopped by the parachute release. Bugger! Again no stomach somersault but the jolt on my crotch was not particularly pleasant. Instructor started to circle us around so I could have a good look round, then he picked up speed on the circling. Had to ask him to go slower as my stomach also started doing circles.
Four minutes later we were coming into land, legs up feet out and down. I survived!! So glad it was the instructors job to land, it takes good judgment and practice. I knew the ground was nearing but with approaching at an angle and still at speed my perception was screwed. I thought we still at some height at the same moment as my arse was hitting the deck. Instantly turned deaf, took me 10 minutes to pop my ears successfully.
Would I do it again yes and no,
Yes, if I get to arrive immediately kitted up and put immediately on the plane.
No, if I had to sit around waiting for god knows how long.
And just so you know I never once closed my eyes!
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No! For fucks sake NO...!!!!!!!!
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Posted:Nov 13, 2012 2:42 pm
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2012 2:27 pm
49085 Views
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Do you ever have a moment when all you want to do is smash your head against the nearest brick wall. Not just once but repeatedly. For once its not even work related.
Thanks to something I've just seen (sorry but can't/won't go into detail) that is exactly what I want to do. Apologies for the briefness but if I didn't do this then my brains would already be leaking out of my shattered skull.
Aside from murder although the permanency of murder does appeal, what is the best way to get rid of a lingering bad smell?
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Full or empty a new theory.
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Posted:Nov 12, 2012 3:24 pm
Last Updated:Jul 30, 2015 2:37 pm
48660 Views
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Its the age old question of is the glass half empty or half full. The ultimate decider of whether you are a pessimist or an optimist. Well I'm going to throw another thought into the mix, how about the realist... I had been trying to think of how to explain this clearly until I found this which does a better job than I could.
No matter whats in it, the glass is always full.
I would like to think of myself as a realist.
What would you describe yourself as?
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The phantom vacancy
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Posted:Nov 11, 2012 9:47 am
Last Updated:Aug 26, 2015 2:27 pm
48424 Views
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A couple of years ago, one of my old colleagues made me an offer that would have been stupid to refuse at the time. No nothing sexual but a new job in a position I'd coveted for a while.
He had moved to a well known dealership, they were planning to open up a new site in a local affluent area. The manufacturer had already selected him as chief technician, told him he could hire his own staff and he wanted me as the service manager. The position came with a higher salary that what I'm currently on, with a company car and being a dealership with less responsibility. In my eyes it was win win win with an extra bit of win of the side.
However as the site was under construction I would have to wait a couple of months. So never tendered a resignation as I wanted to wait until I had the conformation of employment letter.
Every now and again I would get updates and the start date was drawing closer but never received anything more concrete than just updates. Doubt started to creep into my mind so did a bit of investigating, g-oogle was searched and a recon drive to the alleged site. Bit fat zilch on all fronts.
Fair to say I lost my rag and sent a text saying 'OK I need to know what the fuck is going on' to which I heard nothing back. Months later he starts phoning me and texting me apologising, I never answered or replied. Apparently the plans fell through and he didn't know how to tell me. Yeah right....!!!
Now about three weeks ago he starts phoning me again, of course I ignored them. On the last one he leaves a voice mail. Story goes he has opened up his own garage and wants me to come work with him. Me being me hit oogle again, what do I find.. It only bloody exists, do the recon drive sure enough the building exists as well. Double bonus the business deals with Lotus, Noble, Maserati, Ferrari and Lamborghini
Curiosity has piqued to an all time high, and after a chat with my mum during our weekly food shopping trip her comment of 'if you don't find out then you'll always play out the what if scenario' (curses sometimes she does talk sense)decide to bite the bullet. So drive over on a saturday morning to pay him a visit open minded yet still with an element of doubt.
Due to his new business going well he is planning to expand alarm bells did start ringing on that note and he wants me to come in as an assistant manager so he can focus on the new site. Receptionist fair do's but management, sure I do a spot of management when my present boss is on holiday but full time with no technical experience and qualifications. No mechanic would respect me and customers in the super car world would also expect a manager with the relevant experience.
Yet what really topped it off he then tries it on, he has tried in the past and in honesty I have kissed him whilst we were both drunk whilst we were still working together. Since then hes now married with . Told him where to go and left.
Right now I have no idea if the job was genuine or just some elaborate ruse to still try to get into my pants after all this time.
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Ten things you don't know about me.....
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Posted:Nov 7, 2012 3:55 pm
Last Updated:Jul 14, 2017 3:48 pm
49103 Views
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This is proving to be more difficult than I imagined to think of ten things that you all don't know about me and won't be able to find out from prior posts. Immediate thoughts are all tedious and boring factoids which won't make an entertaining read. Also contemplated asking what you wanted to know about me so I ultimately had a list to work from but realised they may predominately be 'wanna fuck?'. So [blog sexy_mel_tv] has set me one hell of a challenge, but challenge accepted....
1- After a two and a half year long relationship my ex dumped me by text with the immortal words of "I'm gay" and this happened on the day of all days, friday the 13th. Knowing this fact another ex decided to dump me on friday the 13th but obviously not the same one.
2- I have been likened to a pringles can, get your minds out of the gutter please, not in that way. Via the slogan 'once you pop you can't stop' after managing an impressive 10 orgasms in 6mins. Still a personal record.
3-Am definately willing to have a go at breaking the above personal record. Maybe one day.....
4-If it wasn't for my brother my diet would be abysmal. I hate cooking and only do it if I have to so having an ex chef in the house really helps.
5-My virginity was lost at the age of 10. I say lost but it was pretty much stolen from me. Thats all I'm saying on that one.
6-I have a phobia/hate of having my breathing restricted. Last bloke that grabbed my neck got kicked in the face as the survival instinct set in. I even recoil away from my mother if she gestures towards my neck without saying anything.
7-Not once in my life have I paid for a PC/laptop, they have all be freebies. Stolen.. no. More of a I'll scratch your back if you'll scratch mine scenario.
8-I do believe in ghosts and in aliens. No one will believe me but I have seen a ghost. As for aliens, although I've never seen anything with my own eyes,though I do sometimes worry about my boss. Out of all the solar systems, in all the galaxies in the entire universe. We surely cannot be the only planet out of the billions with the ability to sustain life.
9-Although I love dogs, never put me near a greyhound. All thanks to being terrorised by three of them as a .
10-My mum tells me that when I was a baby I used to eat cold tea bags and suck on coal. Thankfully I don't remember this.
If you managed to read all the way then I've done a better job than I think I have.
As I have only just come back onto the site I've decided not to tag anyone, somewhat getting the impression that I'm on the last tier of this.
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Same shit different day
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Posted:Nov 6, 2012 1:44 pm
Last Updated:Sep 1, 2014 1:43 pm
48910 Views
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So been out of the loop for a while and from what I can see not a lot has changed. Some familiar faces have remained and some have disappeared which is a shame. However I do have new blogs to peruse over. A hearty hello to those who remember me and a friendly Hello to the those who haven't got a feckin clue that I used to be a regular.
My mums cancer has been treated and radiotherapy finished, shes now on tablets that I can't remember the name of for the next five years. That is a big weight off my shoulders as I began suffering from stress, well thats what the doc said when I went to see why I starting getting incapacitating headaches. Which also led to me going back onto full fat cigarettes haven't had a none alcohol related headache since.
Due to the above I have done some random stuff that made even my closest friends go 'What the fuck!!!' namely chopping off 12inches of hair and donating it to a wig manufacturer. Scarily I was still able to tie my hair back. I loved my hair long and didn't realise just how long it was until it was presented to me in ponytail form. The upside, I now much prefer my hair at its present length though did take a while to adjust.
I have also booked a sky dive to raise money for Cancer Research, should be interesting considering I have a tiny phobia of heights.
Boss is still the .... (insert any derogatory insult and swear word you want as they would all apply) of the century. Was one whiff of a new job but that by itself is worthy of its own post, which I will write soon.
Finally the dry spell continues, the drought has now been just over a year but not through lack of trying. Afraid to say still getting dicked around from dates being arranged and cancelled and this is from a 'conventional' dating site as well so good to know its not just limited to here. Friends over the weekend commented that I must be on the verge of healing up (I do love my mates) my response not bloody likely with the amount of self abuse I do!!
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To link to this blog (69missb) use [blog 69missb] in your messages.
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