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nelson is either jealous or trying to hold onto you as his property he is acting a bit possessive .If he had stated he was concerned for your feelings in getting hurt by the new situation and not been callous and sarcastic it would be different That said Just live , let things happen as they do , do not assume negative feelings immediately and then doubt yourself Or make up negative scenarios for the other people without specifically asking .That is the challenge of having differences in cognitive /emotional function and being around people .. those that mind do not matter and those that matter do not mind . .screw anyone else who does not like what you do or think , they do not live your life and you should not live trying to please others who do truly matter. Trying to be perfect leads to sadness and early death , trying to please everyone leads to guaranteed failure . just be who you are , Think first and then see if feeling is appropriate after checking all the facts . confidence , ! be decisive ! ask for exactly what you need/want in plain language not in code .most people are not mind readers .and always remember , this too shall pass.It is not the end of your life .The sun will rise tomorrow ! We only learn from mistakes ,just try to make fewer of them by learning and applying the knowledge . The biggest issue is often expectation , expectation is merely the seed of tomorrows resentment . just accept what is and expect nothing . it works out much better that way .. peace to you .
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12/13/2017 1:27 am |
The thing with Josh sounds like a communication thing that you have sorted out fairly well, but Nelson's reaction sounds like maybe he is projecting his own fears and insecurities on to you, but that is only what I get from the little bit that I know Not the Whole Truth but the truth that I can see.
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My professional life has no clue as to what I do personally. My peers think I am the old widow who just works and has no men. That makes it even more fun for me and I don’t have to endure judgement or gossip. I understand their wish for discretion. I don’t think he has shame about you. He just wants to live as he wishes without hassle. He sounds like a good guy. Enjoy him and try not to overthink it. 
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^^^ all really good takes on the situation. So far all three of you have been on the up and up and spoken honestly about feelings and questions. Can't ask for anything more than that. Sometimes an open relationship can only be open behind closed doors. Society is still too judgmental and punishment-driven to expect it to be otherwise unfortunately.
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When it comes to open relationships, it is about fun. When there is an intersection of relationships ie...you in the proximity of some of Josh and Miranda's friends, complications can arise. I know that I have worked hard to surround myself with friends that understand who I am and some of my social/life choices. I do that so that I am not embarrassed/ashamed of anything. Not all people have or will go through that kind of effort. Some of our work situations make that very difficult as stated in a previous comment. Josh's point is this...have a good time in public but when the two or three of you get alone, you can go into total compartmentalization mode. You can be with him or them....and totally be yourself. Life is like that. We do things because we have to, but other times we get to let loose and do whatever the fuck we want. Enjoy! It is all about attitude, approach and presentation! What is your AAP?
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