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So how did I get here...? (If you are a mature man, please read on).  

BeeJayHaven 60T
0 posts
3/28/2021 1:48 pm
So how did I get here...? (If you are a mature man, please read on).

My first experience of being submissive was as a guy when at college, long before I ever thought I would become Belinda. I had a hot girlfriend who went full-time to a college I went to once a week. She was gorgeous and, of course, she soon got to know other guys. One day when I was at college one of the guys was amateur porn. Of course I bought them, not only because they were very arousing but the girl in the picture looked exactly like my girlfriend. Her face was never shown fully but that hair, those breasts, those long sexy legs, that butt.
The feelings of jealousy and being let down paled into insignificance compared to the strong feelings of arousal that my girl had her lips around some young college hunk with other hunks lining up behind her.
The feelings of jealousy actually made looking at the pictures even more arousing. The thought of some alpha male having his complete way with my girlfriend’s obviously willing and convulsing body is still, to this day, immensely arousing to me.
My second experience was during my second marriage. I was Belinda then and fully out to my wife. We hadn’t had sex together in years. While at work she met a black guy and admitted she was having sex with him. I couldn’t sleep each night for the arousal this caused me. Just watching her habits change, her getting up early and rushing in to work. The thought that he had her at his finger and most definitely his penis tip. I read some of her texts and they were explicit and again this was arousing to me, not heartbreaking strangely, more exciting, god yes exciting! The fact that she was worried about him getting her<b> pregnant </font></b>because he was bare backing her actually made it even more arousing.
So she knew about Belinda and supported me so of course I supported her. I had to embrace her new found love or sex interest and I must admit that I really enjoyed taking her shopping for sexy clothes for his pleasure. It brought out Belinda and what fun she has trying on sexy lingerie.
Watching my beloved wife leave for a Friday night stay-over sex session, in the slutty sexy clothes that I had picked for them both, drove me mad with horniness. The feeling of being just a beta while this big manly alpha black guy pushes his fat penis into my, oh so willing, wife, and there is nothing I can do to stop it.
Now that I recognize that I am, and forever will be, Belinda I understand those feelings are part of being Belinda. I am just a girl that wants to be the jewel in a man’s eye and devote my time to serve and him in any way he would like and whenever and wherever he desires.
What am I looking for?…I often get asked….(despite my profile ) well…I hate to categorize so let’s just say what I find attractive. I like older mature smart men…they know what they want and usually say what they mean. They also don’t give a sh*t what other people think and I love that about them! Guys with balls I say! Xxxx. I also think that more mature guys appreciate good conversation more too (and good wine of course!). They totally “get” that the mind is far the best sex organ. Body wise…Well yes of course…big is nice but not a game changer. I like a stocky build man, a little hairy is nice too. Height, I don’t care but it is nice when my date is the same height or as tall when I am in heels,,,(sorry, I am 6ft with my 5 or 6 inch heels) but I am OK if the man is OK with that.

I want to feel that special connection...when we can talk all night and laugh all night and make love all night.


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