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Dirty talk gone wrong  

Hawkfan533333 31M  
115 posts
2/26/2020 9:52 am
Dirty talk gone wrong


What is the funniest, strangest, or surprising things someone has said you during sex that you didt see coming?

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azcupl2001 61M/60F
39 posts
2/26/2020 11:21 am

first date with a gal we ended up in bed. but she only wanted anal. Did not see that coming and was not prepared. No lube and spit did not work well!


Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/26/2020 11:29 am

???

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Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/26/2020 12:24 pm

    Quoting  :

Well can you run from a bear in a pair of heels? Seems like a great question! Lol

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Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/26/2020 12:28 pm

    Quoting azcupl2001:
    first date with a gal we ended up in bed. but she only wanted anal. Did not see that coming and was not prepared. No lube and spit did not work well!
Excitement of going backdoor on her, then the disappoint of no backdoor bummer

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Heathen_G 61M
7838 posts
2/26/2020 1:47 pm

I don't allow my women to talk during sex.... unintelligible sounds are fine, but no talking.


mufdiver69er2 60M  
1432 posts
2/26/2020 3:32 pm

she said...you can stay the night...his mom and dad wont bond him out till tomorrow morning.....lmfao

woop woop


mufdiver69er2 60M  
1432 posts
2/26/2020 3:34 pm

    Quoting Heathen_G:
    I don't allow my women to talk during sex.... unintelligible sounds are fine, but no talking.
what do they care..you already paid em...

woop woop


Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/26/2020 6:52 pm

    Quoting  :

That work if I was chasing you, but I'm not sure you want a bear playing with your honey pot

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Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/26/2020 7:00 pm

If I were to throw mine out there, it was me who said this is your sister's favorite position to, it was obviously a joke, and I was young. And I was with one girl, who was a American English speaking woman all night, but she spoke in Spanish during sex.

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author51 57F  
102484 posts
2/27/2020 12:16 am

I have a video up with an ex lover who was trying to get a shot he wanted.He told me to suck in my gut...I just started to howl and we had to stop because I could not stop laughing.. Sex should always have those funny or awkward moments..What makes it fun...Good post..

One can never have enough JOY in their life...


Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/27/2020 1:13 am

    Quoting author51:
    I have a video up with an ex lover who was trying to get a shot he wanted.He told me to suck in my gut...I just started to howl and we had to stop because I could not stop laughing.. Sex should always have those funny or awkward moments..What makes it fun...Good post..
Read something saying, if you haven't ever had a laughing moment during sex with your partner, that you have been doing it wrong.

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lust4life59 61F  
832 posts
2/28/2020 4:54 am

I had been dating a man for several months, but he came from a different, more traditional sexual background than I had. I took him to his first sex positive party, small group of people, just hanging aorund outside, cooking hamburgers. I worried about him feeling comfortable, with not just the nudity, but the sex in the open. But he was right in there, His first experience of public nudity. I took him inside to show him the house,everyone else was outside, first bedroom we came to, he told me to go over and lean over the bed. We were making enough noise I was later told they could hear us outside. In the middle of it, there was a voice in the doorway, deadpan, "Would you like cheese on your hamburger? " WE stopped mid stroke for a second, then both of us cracked up. Now he says everytime he's asked that question he gets a huge smile on his face.


Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
2/28/2020 5:13 am

    Quoting lust4life59:
    I had been dating a man for several months, but he came from a different, more traditional sexual background than I had. I took him to his first sex positive party, small group of people, just hanging aorund outside, cooking hamburgers. I worried about him feeling comfortable, with not just the nudity, but the sex in the open. But he was right in there, His first experience of public nudity. I took him inside to show him the house,everyone else was outside, first bedroom we came to, he told me to go over and lean over the bed. We were making enough noise I was later told they could hear us outside. In the middle of it, there was a voice in the doorway, deadpan, "Would you like cheese on your hamburger? " WE stopped mid stroke for a second, then both of us cracked up. Now he says everytime he's asked that question he gets a huge smile on his face.
That's hilarious and now this story will pop in my head anytime I'm asked that question.

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Knoxslutwife 45M/41F  
181 posts
3/3/2020 8:06 pm

    Quoting azcupl2001:
    first date with a gal we ended up in bed. but she only wanted anal. Did not see that coming and was not prepared. No lube and spit did not work well!
that was a man baby!


Hawkfan533333 31M  
680 posts
3/3/2020 9:43 pm

Outch!

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