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In The End  

Hvschickforfun 40F
53 posts
2/16/2021 1:55 pm
In The End

I’ve gone back and forth on writing this here. But since it started here, might as well write the ending to this saga.

I hadn’t heard much from him so being , I messaged him just to see what he was up to. He said that he was pretty much working his life away and didn’t have time for anything else. I asked him if I could come see him and to my surprise he said yes. So I made plans to go see him last Friday night.

I was fine till I got in my car to go over there. He lives about an hour away, and I used to make the drive all the time so it didn’t seem that far. After what felt like an hour of driving to realize I wasn’t even half way there yet. So I called L just to pass the time but of course it went straight to voicemail. So it was just me and my thoughts in my head.

I finally arrived, took a drink of my diet Dr. Pepper, grabbed my phone and went to the door. He let me in and I went straight to the couch and sat down. I asked him how he’d been, it been almost 8 months since I’ve seen him. He looked like he’d lost weight but that could be because I’ve never seen him in regular cloths. Just in shorts and a ugly ass t-shirt (ROLL TIDE) that didn’t stay on long.

He made small talk and then I started to ask questions about her. He didn’t want to talk about it and I kept my composure till he yelled at and told if I kept on he’d kick of his house. My first thought was just to tell him to go fuck his self and leave but I didn’t. I explained that I just wanted to understand why he thought it was a good idea. The more I pushed the more he pushed back. I just didn’t want to see him waste his time on some bullshit.

So I sat on the couch in tears. I finally decided this was going nowhere and put my coat on and told him I couldn’t watch him do this. He shrugged his shoulders and I stood up and walked to the door. I turned around and asked him if it was me he didn’t want to talk about it with or anyone and he responded with, “ I don’t think you understand how private I am!” ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I reminded him that I had read his blog...... all of it! I walked out, got in my car and thought about it. My phone rang and it was L. I asked him if he was home and he said he was on his way and he’d meet me there.

I beat him there and waited for like 20 minutes and when he got out he handed me a bottle of fireball and said, “ thought you might need this.” Thanks! He asked me what I thought was gonna happen by going over there. Answers, I wanted some answers. I thought maybe he’d let me in if I was to .I just want to support him and be a friend. It’s not my decision though. Either I was going to support his decision that he thinks is best for him or just walk away from the whole situation. Just like I can’t tell Doc what to do, L it wasn’t gonna tell what to do. That was my decision.

I deleted all the pics and the videos and the platform that we used to communicate. All the conversations over the last 2 years. Kinda outta site out of mind. I wish him the best. I hope it all works out. I haven’t locked the door but I closed it for now. I tried so hard and got so far but in the end it didn’t really matter.

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