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What really matters to me! What matters to you?
Posted:Oct 21, 2020 4:34 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

Fact of life: still horny every morny . Love seeing people having fun together sexually. Too risky for me to "get out there". Very frustrating, I'll admit, but I can wait for a safer day and safer play. That's the thing about aging: everything that matters is present, alive, curious, interested. However, for me the urgency or insistent expectations are tame now.

What matters to me is cultivating friendships. Yes, I'm married. Wife has beautiful qualities but they do not include sex any more. She has always been fond of gays and always known that I'm bi. She's straight. Physical frailty has robbed us of the passion that meant so much for so long. Now we are here for each other as best we can. Perfect? Hardly. But loyal friends.

As I look back I've never been sexclusive. But like Cole Porter's song "Always True to You in My Fashion" from "Kiss Me, Kate", I am passionate about sanity, safety and mutuality. What matters to me most is the cultivation of friendship. I accept differences. Differences often get seen as faults or flaws. Sure, they can be. But only people we don't know well are really GOOD or are really BAD. We're a mix, imo. And our differences can be very enriching.

AdultFriendFinder offers the possibility of opening us to realities about ourselves that the society at large considers taboo or immoral or unfriendly to families. I feel I can be more whole with at least a number of people I meet on AdultFriendFinder. That enriches my life. I think it's great how different we all are, while sharing physical and emotional similarities. Let's nurture beauty and cultivate friendships that enliven and gladden us. Being sexy can be so refreshing.
Fantasy and reality
Posted:Sep 24, 2020 2:36 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

I'm so into physical pleasure. Love looking at photos and videos of naked bodies, imagining delighted men and women and T's. Love being a naked humanimal, so honest, so basic, so regular and renewable like eating and drinking. A lot like eating and drinking. But these days I just literally eat and drink and leave the taste and scent of sex to memories and fantasies and correspondence (open some time to camming). Reality gets in the way--pandemic for instance still a major concern for me and my wife. Wife no interest in sex any more due to significant health issues. So we just don't talk about it. Why pile on pain--for what purpose? We still love each other but no longer in that hot passionate way. So it goes. Stay safe and well, friends. Write if you want to correspond.
Age and rage, sex in the mix
Posted:Aug 31, 2020 3:14 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

For sex is a natural high and a reliable renewable resource! True, the drive is gentler and not as insistent as it used be. Being AdultFriendFinder I've discovered that men and women and trans are unique with different stories, attitudes and desires. Wow. That is so attractive. Sex is common ground even though it is expressed in so many different ways. I just don't understand why it is so taboo, so sketchy in our culture.

I still get angy when I read about people being abused for being part of the rainbow. Labeling sex orientation has a place I suppose, but I prefer seeing others differently. Growing up I wondered if I was gay. Thought so but also considered myself bi. At some point I have also been fascinated with being both male and female. For me that mystery called "chemistry" is more important that any label. If anything is going to happen I want it to be sane, safe and with mutual consent.

Just because I'm older now doesn't mean my passions have disappeared. Far from it. But I'm better at taming the rage and feel more sage for the new pace of things. Abuses, violence, being out of control kindle that sense of rage in me. But remembering there's more to each of us than rage, I'm grateful that sex is still in the mix. This virus calamity is a natural warning to stay well and safe and to recalibrate our passions for a possible future.
Is it okay to feel ordinary and have challenges?
Posted:Jul 4, 2020 4:47 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

I'm still clean and meticulous about hygiene and self care. Love my bod and looking at others' as well. But at 76 with gait and balance issues from a hereditary neuromuscular disorder called CMT2, I feel ordinary and challenged. Not mention feeling shut down for the duration of this pandemic. Being a care-giver for my wife is my top priority (and hers as well ).

Still feel frisky though. Not willing to be risky. Love chatting on IM and corresponding. And looking at others' naked pleasures. It's delightful that there are just so many of us ordinary people. Love it.

Sooo, my answer to my question is YES YES YES1 Virtual pleasures are so much better than none at for now. Woohoo!
Good sense and good scents
Posted:Jun 17, 2020 5:26 am
Last Updated:Jul 30, 2020 7:44 am

Not looking for better or best--just GOOD sense. Women, men, trans--everybody. That's what I like about AdultFriendFinder. You can be who you are and find others who like you and you like them. Good sense is mostly common sense: clean, fit, respectful, mutual, sensual. Love my body. Want you love yours. Scent can be intoxicating. It goes with good sense. Diet, hygiene, low stress improve my sense of scent. Love corresponding, helping each other feel good even briefly.

Happy trails!

Virtual and Real
Posted:May 16, 2020 5:45 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

How's it going AFFers? Some of us deal with handicaps that limit going out in the best of times. We appreciate virtual activities. Then there's corresponding, chatting,dreams that become wet well-wishes. VR--virtual reality. Really? Virtuously? hahaha. I mean virtually? The up side is relative safety from infection and stimulation of imagination.

The down side is the actual touch, taste, scent, sight and sounds of mutual pleasure. There's something MORE in reality. This pandemic forces us to think about what matters to us. That's different from doing what matters to us. We may be alone in our thoughts but we can share them. We're all alone a lot anyway but now more alone together. So let's make the most of what we can do and enjoy whatever fun is available to us--sane, safe and mutual.

I love hearing from women, men, trans, all ages, races. In virtual space age is just a number. In real time we are what we are. We could enjoy both. Enjoy such health as you have--safely, kindly, happily. Virtual hugs and kisses. I'd love to hear from you. Really!
Isolation and Imagination
Posted:Apr 11, 2020 5:35 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

What's between the legs likes the bed, the bathroom, the body, the blast, the burst. What's between ears can go everywhere, up and down the galaxy of ecstasy, including between legs and lips and you name it. I think most of us privately crave what's between body parts and bodies, but since society seems see sex as taboo or restricted or we are ambivalent about pleasure in general and sex in particular, my general impression is that a lot of us never learned how harmonize our lust with our love.

Lust is the bright flame of the candle. Love is the candle. So we light our fires in different ways, visually, emotionally, physically. Without the candle the fire goes out and often enough even with the candle! Enough with the metaphor already.

This pandemic finds a lot of us if not most of us self-isolating for our own protection and that of others. We're lucky if we're partnered with like minded SO. Even so this is a great time for the imagination assist the body. What matters us? What do we want? What do we need? Great time discover ourselves, our inner being. Getting ready for a new way of being together: physically isolated? socially connected? New anticipations and aspirations. Be well. Safe. Sexy. Imaginative! I'd love to hear from you.
Adult friends in a time of infection
Posted:Mar 22, 2020 5:18 am
Last Updated:Mar 23, 2020 3:30 am

To my friends and friends to be: we're a hot lot. Something irrepressible about our flow. It's just always there. At least for me !!! But we're adults, or want to be, pretend to be, actually are. We are careful to be safe and sane and respectful of others who want to play with us and we want to play with. Infections aren't new, eh? They're no fun and that's such an understatement.

At least I don't want to get sick. This new virus is scary because it's unknown. That doesn't make infections we know about any less scary. I'm self isolating these days. I love emailing and texting on IM here on the AdultFriendFinder website. It feels safe and warm and comforting for a few minutes with others of like mind.

I try to live without insistent expectations of others, even when I have to manage insistent urges in my body/mind. It's sometimes challenging, overwhelming even. But it passes with or without orgasm.

We can do this pandemic. It will pass, whether we pass or not anyway! Keep smiling. Drop me a line. I love to connect.
Just be you
Posted:Feb 11, 2020 3:07 am
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2020 2:58 am

Challenges happen at any age and seemingly at every age . Growing up mom and dad and relatives and school, church, society tell you what you should be, make a name, be good (?!), be somebody (that is, somebody "they" want you to be --WTF?) and so forth. But we each eat, digest, eliminate, grow, all the while influenced by the invisible forces of hormones, enzymes, desires, disgusts.

And we manage to make sense of the world around us hammering away to shape us into something on the anvil of existence. Hey, look at me! Oh hey, what the f*** are you staring at? Mmmm. Ahhhh. Woohoo. Bah. Dang. And everything in between.

Satisfy others in order to get a job, to get a partner or friend and at the same time, you have to find out who you are and what difference that makes. Badabing Badaboom. Ping! Pong! Um, Yin Yang (heh heh).

I love this AdultFriendFinder site because we are not ashamed to be our lovely naked selves, however different we are. I've met a host of great people here. I feel I can be me. And, well, I would just like to FEEL you!

Then you and I hit limits: this goes south, then that does, but you and I are still ourselves. We still can smile, remember, play, enjoy ourselves. Yes Yes Yes. So many forces want you and me to do this, be that. But what we are is what we do. It's either Boohoo or Woohoo. So just be you. Oh yeah, I'm here too.
On demanding honesty and our fear of not being "good enough"
Posted:Jan 4, 2020 1:51 am
Last Updated:Jan 24, 2020 2:48 am

No one wants to be abused or humiliated really. It takes guts to be we are. I don't see the point in "coming " if it's only going to ruin relationships we love and are committed to, even though imperfectly. I think the demand for honesty is really a demand that the one we want to with wants what we want and is as safe and sane as we are. Since many of us feel insecure--especially if we're "different"--we may be afraid to be honest. Lying breaks trust but it can make us feel better at the moment. And people in pain want relief. Some prefer alcohol, others , others sex, and on and on. But these behaviors are to relieve pain--psychological and emotional pain. God knows our culture is extremely judgmental and harsh. Not all of us are confident in being ourselves. We fudge to fit in lol . Sad but not bad. At least understandable, imo.

Being honest is a worthy goal. Because our culture is so ambivalent about sexual efficacy/confidence, it's really hard to be honest unless you fit the norms and expectations of the culture. If you're gay or bi or trans or queer (!!!) or otherwise "different" you have to feel safe and confident to be honest. That's not going to work for people think only they are honest but are suspicious of anyone else's "honesty". People have reasons for lying. Condemning "them" may be less effective than trying to understand what "they are afraid of. Particularly when it comes to sex. Just a thought.
Happiness is about being okay
Posted:Dec 14, 2019 5:02 am
Last Updated:Dec 15, 2019 2:36 am

I'm so glad sex can be a great part of being happy. When I was growing up sexual pleasure was either taboo or reserved for marriage and babies. If you were queer or bi or trans or too obviously straight and " there", you were uh, er, um not okay. School, church, parents, doctors, authority figures just put a lid on sex. Oh you couldn't help notice the sticky sheets in the morning, or the thrill of jerking off, but as to "what's it all about?"--well what I learned from my brother and cousin was more stimulating than informative.

Fast forward 50 years (yeah, imagine that ), no more wet dreams but still feel that woohoo ecstasy. Sure love to watch young people enjoy each other, but I still enjoy the activity myself. AND I think there is more toleration and even encouragement of sexual activity--especially safe, sane, consensual. And it's more okay than ever to be bi, gay, trans, straight, queer, questioning, asexual even. That makes such a difference.

I've met some happy women and men on AdultFriendFinder. They love being they are and are not age-ist or looks-ist. Stereotypes are breaking down. You really can be you are. Yes, you have to be careful. That's probably always and forever. But you can like you are. You can like others like you are. You can like they are. Sex, for me anyway, is not all or nothing, but a menu of possibilities: I love the restaurant but don't always select the item. I am selective, though, 'cause I can't stomach everything. Even if I'm not crazy about the meal of the day, I don't stop eating. And my "dishes" are always clean for maximum enjoyment. Being okay is a great beginning for happiness. !!!
Eating out and in
Posted:Nov 29, 2019 3:46 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2019 6:51 am

Sex is a bit like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Takes preparation but quickly consumed and must be re-visited with some regularity. Difference is that sex is in each of us waiting to be shared in safe, sane, consensual ways. Eating you have to go get the food from the market, the garden, the fridge, the stove. Eating in just requires willingness. Sure there's preparation, maybe lots of prep, but all you need is right there--just waiting for willingness to get to it. Might not take long to eat but it's a renewable resource.
Making others happy even if only briefly
Posted:Nov 20, 2019 3:27 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2019 5:44 am

I grew up desiring to be human. It's what I was taught. It's what I bought and considered what I ought to be. Then I learned that "to err is human--to forgive divine". Un hunh. Right. Sooo, to be human was to be GOOD, honest, truthful, virtuous, courageous, wise, strong, moral, virtuous, admirable. But it was also to be, uh, um, er "human" as in vulnerable, flawed, have weaknesses and imperfections.

So which is it? Well, both inseparably. We are not Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde unless our souls are broken. No, I do not like to use the term "human" for our species. Rather I have come to regard us as "humanimals". Yup. We're on a continuum with the animals, with nature and her ways. We may aspire to be "human" in some exalted way, but we become hypocritical if we deny our natural functions, including our sexualilty. It is so easy to avoid, deny, ignore our sexual self understandings (I'm not fond of the term "orientation" because it seems fixed, static, as if we don't change or evolve over a lifetime).

I have evolved. From a confused, naive, messed up boy who allowed wet dreams to equal sextasy, whose fantasies were oh so delightfully gay, whose discoveries were passionately straight, whose self-understanding was increasing bisexual. Wow.

And now I realize that for me sex is a gift of happiness, not a possession to hoard, but a moment to enjoy with mutual satisfaction from those who want to have a happy moment with me. Yes! Yes! Yes! So what that it doesn't last forever. For me I'm not sexclusive but it's fine if you are. We are not enemies. . I am into safe, sane, consensual pleasure even if brief and singular. Just needs to be genuine and happy.

Sorry to be so long-winded. It's just time to be happy, long or short. Too much pain in the world--so much unnecessary, imo. Happiness is a renewable resource. Enjoy reality.

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