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In depth cerebral lifestyle topics created by an experienced couple with a psychology degree and experience as former dating coaches.
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ONLINE DATING PROFILES and STRIKING Similarities with Sales Marketing
Posted:Jun 23, 2019 6:23 pm
Last Updated:Sep 17, 2020 6:44 am
3237 Views

Lifestyle BLOG posting from a couple with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies and a former professional Dating coach.

We have written some blog posts truly hoping make this community a better place through teaching others how offer quality communication, interaction, and increasing the skills necessary be successful creating a quality profile meet more people.

This post will be helpful for all members’ couples, single women and men are trying meet others using these types of media platforms or any online site.

Most people start a membership on any site hoping get connected with people in a few days not realizing they have no plan for marketing themselves.

Sadly most will be deactivated profiles in a few short months not knowing what went wrong and feeling that online is useless and unsuccessful.

Like the old Cliché if you HAVE NO PLAN , you PLAN FAIL!

Online platforms whether sexually oriented or not, are more MARKETING oriented than you might think.

Most members post a torso pic, dick pic ,boob photo or some other non-descript pic that does not show well, and then even worse , no profile description or information for the reader to glean and determine if there is a good match or if there is potential to move forward with that person to meet.

Think about it this way:

When you go shopping for say a box of cereal, there are HUNDREDS of different brands and options available in the isle.

Would you choose to purchase the cereal brand that a has a non-descript photo, no ingredients information, and no information on the company ?

Would you choose to go to the restaurant to eat if it had no pics , no description and no detail on what type of food or ambiance it offered?

We think almost 100% the answer would be NO.

When you are creating a profile imagine you are in competition with literally MILLIONS of other profiles in the immediate area for other member’s attention.

No quality pics and no description will place you at a MARKETING disadvantage!

Everyone one else has spent the time, effort and research on how create a quality profile which markets their personality, attractiveness and lifestyle direction accurately,packaged with a certain level of exciting details and pictures that makes you want READ and meet the person created the profile will be more successful.

It’s exactly how we shop for products and has a striking similarity on how we choose people meet using online platforms.

All of the skills you use choose the right car, right house , the right restaurant go and eat ,should be the skills you use create a successful profile.

When you are looking CHOOSE something you are drawn certain things: let’s take a car for example.

1) You will shop for the best photos that strike your interest in attractiveness.

2) You will research the company and match for the right functionality and package options you like best to fit your personality and driving style.

mileage, power options, GPS technology, automatic lights etc. etc....in other words you did some RESEARCH and read some things about the car

3) You will search for specific brand or TYPE of car and check reliability info and other things that are important you

4) You will for a certain location see the car in your area and TEST drive see if it’s a match, not choose the car that is 2000 miles away.

These are just examples but transition this thinking into creating an ONLINE PROFILE and you should use the skills, description and details that attract the right kind of people towards your BRAND profile.


Use quality photos to show personality, action sports, music, art, interest you may have, sexy well-dressed photos for men and women to garner attention and interest

NOT a selfie in the bathroom with a toilet in the background or a mundane DICK pic with your sweat pants pulled down. ?

I mean think about it. When was last time you went a bar, pulled your pants down and got a date? LOL

Or the famous photo in the bedroom with an array of unkempt clothing , food articles and SHIT laying all over the place.

There are MILLIONS of profiles that truly have NO VALUE at all to their profile yet expect meet people and get frustrated when they don’t.

It helps to know that sexually based website or not; there are many common things we do every day in our lives to make choices yet, here we completely disregard them in favor of meaningless pics and no description profiles, thinking it will work.

This is not how men and women psychologically choose to meet, or spend time to choose or see a product.

THE PRODUCT in this case IS YOUR PROFILE PAGE AND HOW YOU REPRESENT YOURSELF OTHERS.

YES there will be a few people as a minority of the population will choose meet you from a sentence profile and non-descript pic , but this will be very rare.

If you dont spend time on quality pics and something EXCITING and valuable say , why would anyone want or feel enticed meet?

You have already set yourself up for failure.

Its amazing us that we get contacted everyday people want meet but have NO profile pic, no description, no value.

Or just nude bathroom selfie pics of dicks,close up of boob-or NO PIC AT ALL. Its just not a reliable way choose meet.

Yet they ask if we are interested?

WOULD YOU BE INTERESTED IN ANYTHING YOU CANT SEE, READ ABOUT OR HAVE ANY INFORMATION AT ALL?

In todays hyper availability of information we see more than half of the profiles out there with NOTHING in them.

Taking the time learn the process on how humans make choices , certain marketing ideas and using them in your own profile will be more than POWERFUL in making you successful here.

It just takes a little more thought effort and time…..maybe this is what the issue is?

Since we have moved an electronic world maybe our population has lost its skill for interaction and wants EASY, open , immediately available options with no work , no effort and no time spent .

Truly ask yourself if thats the case… when was the last time no effort , no time spent and no real dedication was successful in doing ANYTHING in life?
9 Comments
REAL STATISTICS on dating sites -- LEARN THE TRUE statistical landscape of ALL dating sites
Posted:Mar 28, 2018 6:28 pm
Last Updated:Sep 17, 2020 6:44 am
4148 Views

Articles written by former professional dating coach with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies.

We tend be more analytical than most and willing chronicle our experience in hopes that other people have the same interest in making the community better for all of us.

The truly surprising part is that 30% 70% of members on ALL dating sites , no matter what type-vanilla or otherwise , have ABSOLUTELY NO intention of meeting at all. SEE ARTICLE -www. elitedaily./dating/use-tinder-for-same-reason-not-dating/18394

OR SEARCH TITLE the Title below -----
People Are not Using Tinder Date Or Hook Up, Science Says.

EXAMPLE: Match dot advertises that they created the MOST MARRIAGES of any site on the web and this is TRUE
What they DON'T tell you is:

Average woman spends 2.2 Years find the one

7400 bantered emails in 2.2 years

Average of 60 90 failed or no show dates find the “ONE” in 2.2 years

We get some 500 messages a month, over 35,000 in last 7 years asking meet or chat.

OUR HYPOTHESIS many are using as an ego boost or illusory fantasy of popularity -like having 2000 friends on Face book. There are many articles in psychology today explaining the same.

Truth is DATING sites are MULTI billion dollar entities all often owned by one carrying company---if they actually reported REAL numbers ---who would buy membership...

ALSO if they were so successful at matching people ---you would have significant attrition in membership and thus loss of profits--

SPOILER ALERT ---dating sites are NOT entirely designed to be good at matching people--

No study can take into consideration how many married men posing as singles with no real availability or those single men posing as couples to mine free pics , or just using the ONLINE chat to get off masturbating for self gratification using the chat as additional stimuli with no intent to truly meet.

What all dating sites DO NOT tell you is HOW many messages and conversations it takes to actually meet REAL PEOPLE

Single men on average based on numerous professional studies would need to send 50 to ONE HUNDRED messages to get ONE viable reply.

Due to scheduling, jobs, life etc.. you will meet 1 out of every TEN viable replies you make.

That means doing the math; men will need send 500 to 00 messages just meet one COUPLE.

Don’t take our word for it, research it yourself, may articles on dating statistics no matter what type of site

We have offered over 950 invites meet us over the last 7 , all double confirmed via cell phone and message on this site .

0 PERCENT of men promised show up with statements like , I am a man of my word and ;I always show up;- we have heard and received this verbally or via TEXT HUNDREDS of times over 7 years .....

ONLY 250 men total have physically shown up to meet -representing a 29% success level on actually meeting---

She has chosen only men move a sexual level within the same 7 year time frame out of the 250 men met--A true success level of 4%.

Why such low rate of success-- Men show up older than pics, 50 pounds heavier , too drunk, too aggressive , rude , act as if entitled to sex, too quiet , socially awkward, boring, no conversations skills, and a whole host of other maladies----

It’s so difficult to find intelligent, well-adjusted men that understand how to garner a woman’s attention and join a couple

So far in JUST a year time-frame we have had 5 grandmothers pass away on a Saturday approximately 7pm for most which was about 3 hours from our meeting time--pension for death on Saturdays we guess

(WE DO APOLOGIZE FOR THOSE THAT DID SINCERELY HAVE A GRANDMOTHER DEATH) but ...

you must imagine that statistically the probability is low for all of them match dates and time frame of our preset meet dates

9 car accidents ONE which sent picture of accident illustrating a rain storm (HAD NOT rained in 3 weeks lol--smart guy),

Numerous I fell asleep, plenty of I was too drunk, 3 broken limbs, 8 hospitalizations, over 20- I have my that weekend AFTER knowing the date upfront and committing.

We are still awaiting our first ALIEN ABDUCTION and DEMONIC POSSESSION excuses-- NOW that would be original and unique ---
2 Comments
POOR EMAIL & IM INTRODUCTIONS and why you should place effort in making them BETTER!
Posted:Mar 5, 2020 4:26 pm
Last Updated:Aug 26, 2020 3:49 pm
1641 Views

Lifestyle BLOG posting from a couple with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies and a former professional dating coach.


We have written our blog posts truly hoping to make this community a better place through teaching others how offer quality communication, interaction, and increasing the skills necessary to be successful.

A great way to have more success -TAILOR your message to what you have read in a couples’ profile and express the things that are important to them rather than pushing your own agenda when trying to make an IM or email connection to meet.

This is one of the worst missteps we see people make daily!

Here are three tips that may increase your chances of a reply to your first contact message:

1. Pay some attention to what the recipient has said in their profile description to show that you have actually taken an interest in them. Don’t just send generic messages.

2. Don’t just make a statement in your message; ask a question. Asking a question allows someone to respond, which is more difficult with just a statement.

3. Be honest about yourself. We know that it is easy to establish a degree of rapport by saying you have similar interests to someone else or us, but there is really no point saying that you share something in common if this is not really an interest of yours.

4. A lower use of the personal pronoun I—we get I WANT , I NEED all day long-Did you read to understand what we are looking for?
Most couples are NOT here to randomly fulfill the needs of men or other couples- Most have loving, secure, caring relationships with an open marriage in some way not just looking to fill sexual deviancy.

5. Find common ground or similar interests. This comes from ACTUALLY READING profile

6. Be literate Netspeak, bad grammar, and bad spelling are huge turn-offs. Hey Wat up , you wanna meet tonight-hit me up.. NO REPLY for obvious reasons

7. Bring up specific interests that match what you read-can be from pics, or profile- mention a great travel photo


Interesting story:
VAN HALEN & the Brown M&M’s:
Interesting story: VAN HALEN & BROWN M&M's Van Halen when doing concerts with promoters gave a 50 page stipulation of their rules and regulations.

Embedded inside the 50 page contract was the "MUNCHIE CLAUSE" which stipulated that the band wanted a bowl of M&M's in the rehearsal room with ALL BROWN M&M removed.

For decades this was considered frivolous usage of power and fame.
The band had a far more serious reason for this request as a "SCREENING METHOD" To ensure the promoter had read every single word in the contract, the band created the “no brown M&M's” clause.

It was a canary in a coalmine to indicate that the promoter may have not paid attention to other more important parts of the rider, and that there could be other significant safety or structural problems with the concert venue.
SO IF THE BAND SAW BROWN M&M's in the bowl they knew they had to check all safety aspects of the concert and may even cancel the event due to promoter negligence.

We have the SAME behavioral indicators inside our profile to see if prospective men have read our profile and shown minimal effort or modicum of interest in learning about us.

So we know right away if someone read anything or NOT.

OUR FIRST question will be: have you read our profile before you sent IM or Email message?

We can often tell when men send first message they may have NOT completely read it or looked at all.

We have one of the most detailed profiles on the site for good reason...to help communicate as best we can those that would be a good match to meet us--how to respond and even COLOR CODED for ease of use in reading and helping to make sure it is a match.

Here is the usual introduction we get from prospective men that would like to meet us:
Male: Hey!
Us: Hi!
Male: How are you?
Us: Great, thank you.
Male: What are you into?
Us: Did you read our profile?
Male: Yes, I am interested
Us: What stuck your interest about what you read?
Male: You want men and pics are HOT !!

NOT a great start here.

Just to set the stage we get 200 messages a month, so repeat the above literally thousands of times since we have been on this site, that’s over 16,000 messages most of which made absolutely no effort to read anything we wrote.

It gets tedious , repetitive and frustrating when you have to repeat
EXACTLY what you have already written in the profile to help explain to men trying to meet.
It also takes HOURS to explain the same thing over CHAT that you can easily read in approx. 7 minutes since the average human reads a page of material in 2.5 minutes.

We have created a detailed profile that specifically explains what we look for, best match, and asks some questions.

While EVERYONE tells us that they read profile, we know from the response and exchange that almost 99% never do.

How do we know?

PREFERENCE SECTION list #11 & #12
11) NO one liners, TELL US ABOUT YOURSELF, experience, etc. Have something to pique our interest, something beyond just SEX talk

12) MAKE YOUR MESSAGE STAND OUT in the "sea of mediocrity" that we usually get. Over 200 messages and IM a month-HOW does yours stand out?
Also listed in the profile If you are a match to the above preferences, please feel free to send a message with PICS OPEN.

TITLE should READ ""QUALITY CONNECTION" tells us you have read our entire message. She prefers men with attention to detail, why because we spend too much time with men that dont read first. (Mentioned in the preferences above.)

Men with attention to detail , made a small effort to read for a few minutes and offer an introduction that stands out among the 10’s of thousands of messages couples receive every year will do BETTER at making a connection.
1 comment
QUALITY CONNECTION 2019-FINALLY a GUY WITH SOME SOCIAL ABILITY & PERSONALITY beyond just SEX
Posted:Oct 30, 2019 4:50 pm
Last Updated:Jul 31, 2020 9:57 pm
2353 Views

Its always the SAME story- but this ended with a positive result !!!!!!!

LAST year 2019 we offered approximately 55 invites to meet us, at different times over the year.

ONLY 15 men showed up to meet even though each was DOUBLE confirmed via message on the site, text message via cell phone and in some cases video verify when we have the time.

SATURDAY OCTOBER 26th - we invited 8 men to meet us for drinks in Atlantic city.

We sent a text on site and cell phone to CONFIRM plans to meet night prior to agreed date with time and location and AGAIN saturday afternoon, as a last CHECK to make sure plans are still good.

ALL 8 MEN CONFIRMED TWICE THAT THEY WOULD SHOW UP AND PROMISE TO BE THERE KNOWING OUR FEELING ABOUT MEN CONSISTENTLY RESULTING IN NO CONTACT, NO SHOWS AND GHOSTING.

2 showed up--- of all 8 men that had CONFIRMED they were coming - all others were a combination of cancels last minute, excuses or complete no show without any courtesy of text , message or call.

However of the 2 men that showed up , FINALLY a guy with some social; skills , charisma and personality to be successful in making a good connection that led to a fun night of sexual interlude.

Since he offered us a testimonial we thought we would copy his testimonial and our to TESTIMONIAL him.

Should give a LOT OF MEN the simple message that YOU CANT be successful if you are unable show up and meet.

WORDS ON A SCREEN and empty promises mean nothing !

From: Mingaling Oct 28, 2019
Approved and attached your profile.

It’s hard to come across people in this Lifestyle that not only have the looks but also have the personality to match.

These two exceed both of those expectations you have when meeting a couple

Such a well rounded couple in all aspects. Her beauty just radiates off her not just in the sense of her perfect body and looks but just talking to her and all the knowledge she has.

He is such a laid back guy, so easy to talk and get along with.

Felt like I was meeting up with friends I’ve known for years.

If you are granted the golden ticket to go the next step after the initial meet up you better take full advantage.

Her body is going to leave you dumbfounded. Every bit of her just screams sexy. She knows what she wants and the smile on her face throughout made it unimaginable

Take the time bring your A+ game for this couple because they are beyond worth it.

So glad to have met them and can’t wait see them again! GO GIANTS!!! (Side note don’t say this you may lose some points on her scale)

OUR TESTIMONIAL THAT WE SENT BACK HIM AFTER A GREAT SATURDAY NIGHT OF AWESOME COMPANY & SEX :

For: Mingaling Oct 28, 2019

MINGALIN is what experienced lifestyle couples are looking for in a quality respectful man that understands the dynamic of the lifestyle.

He showed up on time- reliable , respectful , well dressed, handsome guy.

More importantly had conversation skills, social ability, and the right mix of friendly personality along with allure and flirtations skills that trumps more than 95% of the men we meet .

He was the FIRST single male in 2019 that we have moved to a sexual level and invited to the bedroom with us -

a HUGE rarity since most men completely fall apart in the social arena and conversation skills with women.

This guy knows what he is doing and is naturally and sincerely cool.

He will more than exceed your expectations when meeting and is extremely capable in the bedroom , a true pleaser, spends the time to learn and get know how make a night sexy, fun , and memorable.

We are more than happy offer his first certification/testimonial and hope we meet again as often as the distance will allow.

Besides he owes us a bet since his favorite football team LOST and we get a night on him! --------------GREAT GUY !

________________________________________________________________________________
After meeting 15 men this year , this has been the ONLY guy that was able to truly make a qaulity connection and move to a sexual level with us.

SAD how many men need help , training and guidance on how to connect with women.

SEX comes as a BONUS to meeting a not as a result of having a profile on a sex site.

NOTHING in life is guaranteed and so many men feel as if, just showing up is enough to have a married women open her legs and be so excited about your dick.

Showing up is a great first step and we truly wish more men had the integrity to do what they say rather than breaking plans consistently, but the decision for most couples to move to a sexual level does not just hinge on showing up.
1 comment
How to write a QUALITY profile
Posted:Apr 28, 2019 5:31 pm
Last Updated:Aug 26, 2020 3:50 pm
3443 Views

We always see the same descriptions and profiles.

"We want to meet people like us" or " We want to add spice" , or "We joined to explore our sexuality"

WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE do you want to meet, WHAT KIND OF SPICE, WHAT TYPES OF EXPLORATION?

we see these statements along with a one sentence description and either NO pics , or just dick pics, or a bathroom toilet in the back round.

Does anyone truly realize that saying "we want to meet people like us or add spice " is a completely EMPTY statement with no value to the reader?

People like us could mean anything and adding SPICE is relative to the person who is writing the thought. WHAT KIND OF SPICE , threesome , water sports, BDSM , blood letting and cutting during sex.

We are making a joke here but truth is there are MANY people that like this type of play here

Most people writing a profile MUST stop to understand themselves FIRST, what they are looking for , what types of interaction they want to explore and create a profile with more detail around those specific thoughts , else we the reader have NO IDEA what you are talking about.

The swing world has so many nuances, if you dont spell it out you will not be successful in trying to attract and meet the right people.

HERE ARE SOME GOOD IDEAS here or any site because, after all, this is a DATING SITE LIKE ANY OTHER just sexually driven and based

Step 1: CHOOSE THE RIGHT PICTURES
Without the right photos, nothing you write matters.
This is an article about how to write a profile, but if you don’t have the right collection of photos, even the best writer cant help you

When putting together your photo gallery, make sure you look flattering in every picture, NOT a toilet in the back round or wearing dirty torn clothing LOL

If you can combine this with pictures that also show your personal interests and most attractive personality traits, you’ll have a very powerful photo gallery.
SPORT PHOTO
TRAVEL PHOTO
WINE & FOOD

add something of interest not just a DICK or torso pic-contrary to what MOST MEN think .. woman and couples DONT CHOOSE TO MEET because of the beauty of your dick. SIMPLE and pretty much common sense.

Step 2:
THIS blog post has a structure ----

Your profile should be structured in a similar manner. Each “mini paragraph” should give an idea of who you are as a person, what you are looking for , LIKES & DISLIKES etc.

Step 3:
Add some ideas that give people a CONVERSATION STARTER

The harder it is for someone to start a conversation with you, the more likely they will move onto the next profile, even if they were otherwise interested.

ask a question:
What is you r favorite place to travel?
What made you get into the lifestyle?
What is your idea of a great lifestyle date night?

These are ideas to give an ICE breaker and start conversation on more than just "hey , what are you into" and then having to re type and explain that THOUSANDS of times to different people contacting you

Step 4:
Remove all negativity.

Instead of writing, “I was bored or I just got out of a DIVORCE”

try, “I am looking to explore some new sexual ideas and have recently become single. I would love to meet a couple to learn and enjoy MFM”

Never focus on negative things in your life

Negative energy always attracts negative attention.

When someone approaches your profile it should exude optimism, happiness, and portray someone who is excited about meeting

Step 5:
Show don’t tell.

Saying you are funny or adventurous DOESNT CONVEY ANYTHING

try - telling a funny joke & story or explain HOW you are adventurous and show a MOUNTAIN CLIMBING picture- far more effective

Step 6:
change it up

People who read your profile want to know that meeting you will be fun and exciting

The more interests, passions, and personality traits you reveal, the more people will be drawn to your profile, and the more likely people will be able to find commonalities with you.

More commonality means more success and quality matches

Step 7:
Proof read what you wrote

There is a lot to think about and create but a poorly written , grammatically incorrect profile is disastrous.

It could be something as simple as a phrase that accidentally comes across as desperate or needy, a really bad grammar mistake, poor language choice, a misguided picture, negative energy, or any number of the dozens of unintentional red flags that people accidentally show.

Always proof read your profile

Step 8:
Put some thought into what you are doing

Time and EFFORT are prerequisites to a good profile and qaulity communication

Writing a profile takes a little time and extra effort, but you can create a profile that helps you stand out and meet the kind of people you’re interested in.
5 Comments
BEST advice for both SINGLE & COUPLES on Profile pics and how to succeed using ONLINE profiles
Posted:Aug 26, 2020 11:17 am
Last Updated:Oct 29, 2020 4:46 pm
597 Views

BLOG posts from a former professional dating coach with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies.

We hope our posts help make this community better offering the skills and education help members both experienced or new be more successful.

Your profile picture can be the difference between someone deleting your email and responding it. That first two-second impression is utterly crucial how you operate these websites.

If you pick the right profile pictures, you will increase your replies and ultimately your success!

First, what should your profile look like if you’re a single person?

If you’re a single person looking meet a couple, your swinger dating profile pic is how you tell this couple that you’re ready for action.

If you have a nice body, show it off. Add details on what type of person you are and what type or people you are looking meet- DETAILS MATTER- A great pic with no INFO means most couples will BYPASS your profile without contact.

This does not mean post a picture of your dick.
It should be known that most women and couples will not choose meet a man from a dick pic, they have no value.

Bathroom and mirror selfies are the absolute worst choice for your profile

Just some fun sarcasm" Ever heard a woman say -W

WOW I have meet that beautiful Dick? or
What a beautiful toilet in the back round of that Dick photo?

Much more likely they are looking to meet the man not a dick.

Dick pics are classless and should be shared when asked for. Always have nice lighting (natural lighting if you can, front off-center lighting if you don’t).

Try to get someone else to take the picture, and always include your face, or be willing to share. Worst is those single that say I cant share my face.

How would anyone know if they would be attracted to you ?

Remember, you’re getting people to invite you into their relationship. This is a very intimate act, and you should look like someone that is worth getting to know.

If you don’t have a great body, don’t worry!

There are plenty of swingers who are looking for exactly your kind of person, no matter what you look like.

No matter how old you are, how much you weigh, what your skin is like, there are people out there who are looking for you.

If you are not confident in your body, dont worry!

Take pictures of yourself in action shots. Make yourself seem like the kind of person that someone would want to hang out with.

Pick something you won’t mind talking about if the subject comes when you finally meet someone online you want move a real-life hookup.

Don’t just photoshop yourself in front of something interesting if you don’t know anything about it. If someone asks, you’ll just look like a fool.

If you’re a couple, make sure both of you are in the photo!

You’d be surprised at how many couples only post photos of one person online. Sometimes it’s because one is shyer than the other, or didn’t want their face in the photo.

Whatever the reason, it comes across as a bit strange to have a couple advertised but only one person in the picture. or thats its a FAKE couples profile. This is the first conclusion experienced couples will think.

Do something fun.

You don’t need to post photos of the two of you kissing, but it’s nice if others can see that there’s genuine affection between the two of you.

Remember, you’re inviting someone into your life, even if it’s only for a single evening. You want them to know they’re coming into something fantastic.

If you have nice bodies, don’t be afraid to show them off—but there’s no reason to be really lewd about it.

If the person who wants to hook up with you wants to see more intimate shots, it’s fun to get them to ask for it.

In general, shots of the two of you poolside or at the beach is a great way to showcase your bodies without being extra forward. If you can show off your bodies in an effortless, fun way without making a big deal out of it, that’s even better.

The basic rule of thumb is simple. Make yourself look like the kind of person (or couple) you’d want to hang out with.

MOST PEOPLE join these sites with no plan, no organization and no real thought behind the profile they are creating.

We have seen 10's of thousands of DEACTIVATED members or those that have QUIT in as little as 90 days due to no success.... however there is a reason for this...

The profile itself often had no value, no quality pics , and no information.

You have to know your audience and create a profile that would be enticing for those to get to know you and invite you to meet ---otherwise its an exercise in futility and wasted time and effort.
1 comment
BEST advice for both SINGLE & COUPLES on Profile pics and how to succeed using ONLINE profiles
Posted:Aug 26, 2020 11:11 am
Last Updated:Oct 29, 2020 4:46 pm
573 Views

BLOG posts from a former professional dating coach with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies.

We hope our posts help make this community better offering the skills and education help members both experienced or new be more successful.

Your profile picture can be the difference between someone deleting your email and responding it. That first two-second impression is utterly crucial how you operate these websites.

If you pick the right profile pictures, you will increase your replies and ultimately your success!

First, what should your profile look like if you’re a single person?

If you’re a single person looking meet a couple, your swinger dating profile pic is how you tell this couple that you’re ready for action.

If you have a nice body, show it off. Add details on what type of person you are and what type or people you are looking meet- DETAILS MATTER- A great pic with no INFO means most couples will BYPASS your profile without contact.

This does not mean post a picture of your dick.
It should be known that most women and couples will not choose meet a man from a dick pic, they have no value.

Bathroom and mirror selfies are the absolute worst choice for your profile

Just some fun sarcasm" Ever heard a woman say -W

WOW I have meet that beautiful Dick? or
What a beautiful toilet in the back round of that Dick photo?

Much more likely they are looking to meet the man not a dick.

Dick pics are classless and should be shared when asked for. Always have nice lighting (natural lighting if you can, front off-center lighting if you don’t).

Try to get someone else to take the picture, and always include your face, or be willing to share. Worst is those single that say I cant share my face.

How would anyone know if they would be attracted to you ?

Remember, you’re getting people to invite you into their relationship. This is a very intimate act, and you should look like someone that is worth getting to know.

If you don’t have a great body, don’t worry!

There are plenty of swingers who are looking for exactly your kind of person, no matter what you look like.

No matter how old you are, how much you weigh, what your skin is like, there are people out there who are looking for you.

If you are not confident in your body, dont worry!

Take pictures of yourself in action shots. Make yourself seem like the kind of person that someone would want to hang out with.

Pick something you won’t mind talking about if the subject comes when you finally meet someone online you want move a real-life hookup.

Don’t just photoshop yourself in front of something interesting if you don’t know anything about it. If someone asks, you’ll just look like a fool.

If you’re a couple, make sure both of you are in the photo!

You’d be surprised at how many couples only post photos of one person online. Sometimes it’s because one is shyer than the other, or didn’t want their face in the photo.

Whatever the reason, it comes across as a bit strange to have a couple advertised but only one person in the picture. or thats its a FAKE couples profile. This is the first conclusion experienced couples will think.

Do something fun.

You don’t need to post photos of the two of you kissing, but it’s nice if others can see that there’s genuine affection between the two of you.

Remember, you’re inviting someone into your life, even if it’s only for a single evening. You want them to know they’re coming into something fantastic.

If you have nice bodies, don’t be afraid to show them off—but there’s no reason to be really lewd about it.

If the person who wants to hook up with you wants to see more intimate shots, it’s fun to get them to ask for it.

In general, shots of the two of you poolside or at the beach is a great way to showcase your bodies without being extra forward. If you can show off your bodies in an effortless, fun way without making a big deal out of it, that’s even better.

The basic rule of thumb is simple. Make yourself look like the kind of person (or couple) you’d want to hang out with.

MOST PEOPLE join these sites with no plan, no organization and no real thought behind the profile they are creating.

We have seen 10's of thousands of DEACTIVATED members or those that have QUIT in as little as 90 days due to no success.... however there is a reason for this...

The profile itself often had no value, no quality pics , and no information.

You have to know your audience and create a profile that would be enticing for those to get to know you and invite you to meet ---otherwise its an exercise in futility and wasted time and effort.
0 Comments
INSIGHT INTO MONOGAMY vs Traditional Marriage and deeper insight into SWING LIFESTYLE couples
Posted:Jul 21, 2020 1:53 pm
Last Updated:Aug 26, 2020 3:50 pm
908 Views

INSIGHT INTO MONOGAMY

Articles written by a former professional dating coach, psychology degree in Human behavioral studies.

This is a deeper look at the decision to share sexual partners, not just SEX oriented decision but based much deeper within the human brain and predicated more so on tenants of psychological nature of human Biology.

MOST people think its just a SEX hookup site.

The decision for most experienced , tenured , quality SWINGER members is much deeper than just fucking or sex and requires a little more connection , commonality and respect than people think.

ITS ALSO why we see 10's of thousands of DEACTIVATED profiles in our 7 years here that quit in as little as 90 days due to NO success because they lacked a true understanding how the SWINGER WORLD works and why people choose to have open relationships of some nature

Almost civilizations before the advent of Christ had some form of communal love making and sharing.
Greek, romans, Indians (wrote the Kama sutra) , Norwegian (Vikings would share wives prior battle, in hopes that men would be more apt protect their brothers back in war, creating a closer fighting and family unit within their society)

Japan this day still has certain open marriage unwritten rules- MEN have concubines and it’s not uncommon for women have a partner AFTER having a baby since a mothers brain changes BABY BRAIN rather than having attention towards male partner as it would have been prior to motherhood days.

I often think that these cultures had it CORRECT -- we are varietal creatures...

You only see anomalous examples where a HUMAN would choose to have the same dinner, same drink, and same vacation, drive same car etc. etc... You see the pattern, for an entire lifespan

Marriage came out of necessity during religious creation and was useful for when we lived to age 35 to protect and nurture a family.

It did not take into consideration longevity of 90 yrs. old present day.

Humans are varietal creatures and to expect one partner to be the EVERYTHING for another person for a lifespan is asking a lot.

This is also why we have friends with different personalities that we may choose to spend company since they serve different interest and needs for us on a social scale.

There are tons of statistics going the way back the KINSEY sexual institute studies in the 1960's

74% of men anonymously report some form of infidelity during a marriage
You would think much lower for women?

63% of women anonymously report infidelity

30% of married couples report staying in an UNHAPPY marriage for or financial reasons and are NO longer in love with their partner.

Add that a natural DIVORCE rate of 50% 54% in any given year means that 84% of marriages end in divorce or unhappy pairing where almost ¾ of both men and women have cheated.

It should be readily apparent that monogamous marriage has never truly been monogamous.

Ask any mathematician and these numbers mean that DIVORCE & CHEATING is the majority not representative of monogamous marriage being successful at .

We are not against marriage BUT do believe that there should be more individualistic rules and arrangements for each set of people –

Not rely an old antiquated system that never took human psychology into consideration... we blindly follow a lot of societal constructs without truly thinking about them and how they affect our relationships with each other

We don’t think we have any more answers than anyone else.. BUT do feel that making your own rules and family unit around reality makes far more sense than something that is 2000 years old.

There is a GREAT book out there called "AGAINST love” Laura KIPNIS ... its a "polemic" which is a story based on truths that is written not to answer any specific question but rather to provoke thought and conversation --GREAT BOOK

The most reported anonymous FANTASY by men is to see their wife sleep with another man... Also has not changed since the 60's since KINSEY INTSTITUE studies and has some roots in "sperm competition" –
-hidden deep within our brain AMYGDALA to be exact are instinctual drives and instinct just like any other mammal on the planet

when most animals mate another animals girl LOL ... they are immediately driven to have sex so that the SCOOP of the penis can REMOVE the other sperm and deposit yours to further promote pro creation of the strongest and most virile sperm --whichever one that may be ..

No matter how hard we try or what means we use to place ourselves into boxed dogma of societal thinking... You will never beat biology...

BIOLOGY will win even if it’s just in fantasy inside the head and never acted on.

Why porn is so popular and in some cases just as bad as the "cheat" part...

easier to just talk about it and grow as a race to understand needs and human interaction.
2 Comments
No show , No contact , last miute cancellations
Posted:Oct 13, 2019 6:05 pm
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2020 7:13 am
2971 Views

Lifestyle BLOG posting from a couple with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies and a former professional dating coach.

WRITTEN OCTOBER 13th ,2019

This will be one of our shortest articles.

We do a lot of work to set expectations , make plans, confirm and reconfirm when trying to meet a new person-date , location , & time to meet as well as clear our schedules to ensure that we are available.

We are consistently cancelled on last minute, or even worse no contact , no show after hours, days , or even weeks of text messaging and calls.

You cant be successful on any site if you DON'T SHOW UP.

We are tired, frustrated and disappointed by the lack of courtesy our society offers others.

Over 80% of plans on this site never show up -- This is one of the major reasons that people QUIT the lifestyle and using online sites of this nature- due to so many lies, fakes, and people that simply cant keep a promise to meet.

Simple message -- have some integrity and courtesy for others time and effort.
12 Comments
Do you choose to meet men from ONLY a dick pic?
Posted:Oct 4, 2019 3:01 pm
Last Updated:Jul 27, 2020 10:29 am
2765 Views

There are many different preference for best match.

It seems that almost 90% of male profile only HAVE A DICK.

While we like a quality dick photo , we will not choose to meet a man for her, if men are NOT willing to show anything more than just a dick picture

What we are interested in knowing is:

Do couples or single women choose to meet men with ONLY a dick picture to make a decision?

Would you meet?
YES
ABSOLUTELY NOT-NO
2 Comments , 26 votes
SELFIES SUCK! - Take a normal picture for your profile
Posted:Aug 9, 2019 7:42 pm
Last Updated:Oct 29, 2020 4:46 pm
2713 Views

Lifestyle BLOG posting from Couple with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies and a former professional dating coach.


We see almost every profile including couples profiles with SELFIES posted as main pics.

This trend is TERRIBLE.....and its NOT doing you any good!

You should always have some one else take your picture for profile, it will have far better quality and show more appealing than you might think.

Also , since couples by definition are 2 PEOPLE , you have no excuse not having another person available to shoot a good pic.

Why do we tell you this?

Phone cameras don’t work like mirrors.

Instead, they distort the image at short distances (like where selfies are usually taken from), with the facial features looking bigger than they actually are.

According to CNN, the nose in particular can look up to 30% bigger than it actually is.

The solution is to have someone else take your picture like a normal fucking person, or use a selfie stick to create some space between you and the camera.

Using a little creativity , back round , design , thought and maybe even having a little fun while shooting may help you post some more exciting photos, get more views and potentially more connections here!

Its not that hard to do and can help you look better to reach the audience you want to meet , so its worth the extra time and thought behind it.

SELFIES SUCK!
2 Comments
How to write a quality message to others-Communication tips
Posted:Jun 23, 2019 7:37 pm
Last Updated:Jul 31, 2020 9:59 pm
2925 Views

Some tips from the rare with a psychology degree in human behavioral studies as well as former professional dating coach.

This is not say we are leading experts on the subject but far more versed than most and used TEACH men and women how make better,more successful connections with other people on a romantic and sexual level.

Oh, I, could tell you why
The oceans near the shore
I could think of things I'd never
Thunk before,

And then I'd sit down and think some more.
I would not be just a muffin',
My head all full of stuffin',
My heart all full of pain;
And perhaps I'd deserve you and be
Even worthy even you
If I had a brain.
SCARECROW -WIZARD OF OZ

We have of the most detailed profiles on this site, with explicit road map on the best approach yet we still get word or sentence greetings asking if we are interested?

We look at profile from person sending message and there is NO PIC, a DICK pic, and no description available.

HMMM HOW CAN ANYONE BE INTERESTED with no information make a decision?

There are plenty of couples that are looking for stunt cock and have limited profile descriptions themselves, so possibly from inference you may get with these couples with such a mediocre or sub par greeting.

However when you see a couple that has spent time and effort giving a great deal of detail it should automatically be considered that maybe....they are looking for more.

We are of the rare single friendly couples on any site.

Like the opening of the wizard of oz excerpt, we WISH single men had a brain.

Be worthy, sit and think before sending a lackluster introduction.

Especially when you have a couple that spent time let you know exactly how respond.

We get THOUSANDS of messages a year so keep that in mind!

OH wait we should be absolutely ECSTATIC that you sent a HI ! message --HOLY SHIT 2 letters and an EXCLAMATION POINT --

OH now we found the ONE ..

let me get my wife ready SPREAD her legs WIDE open and get ready for the most intuitive, most intense , ground breaking sex she has ever received ---anyone writing 2 letters and an exclamation MUST be the absolute best choice there is in the universe.

Come on? Think, use your brain- HOW does your message stand among the 200 others that we receive monthly and garner our attention with such a lack of effort in reading and NO apparent attention detail.

or wait....Hung, 26 year old with stamina ----get plenty of those ---OF course we are so interested no picture , no value and absolutely no reference the things we offered in profile that may be important us.

When was the last time you took your cock at a Night Club with a BAG on your head , PULLED DOWN YOUR PANTS and spoke No words other than ARE YOU INTERESTED? and had 20 to women swooning over the beauty of your cock? NEVER?

So , we ask , Why do it here?

Do you think thats a good way build rapport?

We have NEVER seen this work before yet on virtual interaction men consistently do it here as if the cock is a decision factor over the other 1 MILLION COCK pics that exist on this site.

Stop thinking with the totality of your DICK and you may find better success.

Step step:
1) Read profile

2) respond with something of interest that specifically points to a SPECIFIC thing you like about our profile or HOW YOU fit the preferences WE ARE LOOKING FOR.

3) Show some effort -give examples or direct reasons why you feel you may be a good match

4) STOP leading with your own agenda --statements like I want to meet because I want to fuck her, means nothing to us ---you are in a sea of lackluster , mediocre responses with everyone else

5) OPEN pictures or be ready provide --HOW can we offer invite when UNABLE gauge attraction -or have a COCK pic-we dont invite cocks meet --we invite MEN with personality and intelligence-Common sense

6) Use common sense --she is not a piece of meat and sex is not guaranteed --nothing in life is-- natural conversation and interest is how HUMAN BEHAVIOR works -- not a cock pic !

We list preferences and a direct step step on how approach us and yet still get ridiculous introductions..

We know we are on a sex site BUT is it so unimaginable that we expect some intelligence, intuition and effort?

How about natural communication and conversation SKILL above and beyond sex?

If you cant write a complete thought or give effort in introducing yourself how do you think we feel YOU PERFORM IN BED? The the disregard and lack of interest other than getting yourself off?

This is your chance make a first impression --why is it that our society has lost all its ability make a quality introduction and offer anything of value more than a few words and a virtual bullshit greeting.

We are very approachable, honest, sincere people that want meet --but also have a certain expectation at least read profile and extend a moderate level of effort with us-
1 comment
OUR idea of a GREAT night meeting a Single Guy
Posted:May 2, 2019 2:05 pm
Last Updated:Aug 26, 2020 3:51 pm
3091 Views

POSITIVE MEETING STORY
-- we visited Atlantic city NEW JERSEY in August 2018...we met a great guy, handsome model quality looks, great physique , well above average size and great interactive personality with sex appeal..

we went for drinks, light bite to eat around pm... dancing a bit at the night club where she is more than willing to kiss, dance and "rub" while flirtation begins but respectfully so in public...

She invited him back to our hotel room at 1am....he fell asleep at 5am ---so great stamina, fun MFM , sharing her and "taking turns. He awoke to us at 9:30am still at it ....

He had thought we went to sleep....we actually took a few breaks but were still having fun some 4 and a half hours later AFTER already spending 4 hours MFM with him-- ..

He exclaimed "AND I thought I was good!!" we all had a nice laugh, the comment and the moment of experience was worth the whole night...

it was great he came to a true realization we were the type of couple is NOT missing anything at all ...we enjoy sex, interaction and fun with the right people and he was a great match for us to have been cognizant, socially adept, and perfectly flirtatious to enjoy the night with us

There was no role -fantasy enactment, "need" to perform for us nor us him.

No need other than to have a good natural time with the buildup of the night and the excitement she found someone she liked enough to invite back to the room which happens RARELY ---

She has no real "need" for the LifeStyle but likes to when it fits and makes sense to her.

We are always happy and refreshed we met some one has NATURAL ability to make a connection with social skills to garner the right kind of attention without having to force their own agenda on an already experienced couple.
3 Comments

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