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Hippie, Nun and the Bus Driver
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Posted:Oct 22, 2008 11:38 pm
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2009 9:53 am
25658 Views
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Got this from a friends blogs, he is so funny. You should check out his blog if you have the check, JHinTracy. He is so cool.
A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.
The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop.
When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."
The hippie, of course, says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord.
"If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."
The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.
The nun agrees, but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.
After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie!"
The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"
Bet you didn't see that coming!!!!
       
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Wish Me Luck!!!
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Posted:Aug 3, 2008 11:42 am
Last Updated:Sep 20, 2008 10:08 pm
24752 Views
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So much has been happening lately. This last week I was talking to a friend about quitting smoking. I have so many reason to quit but the biggest one right now is that I just can't afford to buy them anymore. But my friend had just quit himself and he was telling me that I should just pick a day and do it. So, that is what I did. I pick a day.
So, as of yesterday I have quit. I have done really well, I must say. Went all day yesterday without a smoke. But I was disappointed in myself last night. Messed up and had one before bed...could have just kick myself for that one. But this morning I got up and started again. Have not had one yet today. So, I have not given up, I guess we all fall sometimes, just have to keep trying.
Someone once told me, of course she was talking about something else, but I guess it works for this and a few many other things too. She told me that it is not a shame to fall off the wagon, the shame is not getting back on and trying again. I'm going to keep trying. I started smoking when I was fourteen. That is a long time to be smoking, it will take time for me to get out of the habit. Does anyone have a pen cap?....haha!
Wish me luck...I'm not giving up this time.
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Morning Sex
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Posted:Jun 8, 2008 10:25 pm
Last Updated:Jan 1, 2009 2:41 pm
25116 Views
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The door was unlocked, just as you had promised. I let myself in, being careful to enter as silently as possible so as not to disturb you. I hurriedly undress before entering the bedroom. There you are, asleep, covered only by a sheet. I admire your figure there on the bed. Perfect ass cheeks begging to be caressed, the curve of your back calling me to be next to you. I hesitantly enter your bed, not wishing to wake you from your slumber. You stir and release a small moan, as if from a dream of ecstasy. Your body meets mine and I wrap my arm over you, my hand coming to rest on your bosom. You smile gently, not fully awake yet. I can not resist your abundant breast and almost without thinking I fondle it. Your gasp with pleasure, beginning to awaken now. You arch your back and press your round ass against my already stirring cock. I meet your desire and my cock slips between your ass cheeks. Both my arms are around you now, fondling your breasts, my cock throbbing between your ass cheeks, my mouth nibbling on the nape of your neck and your ears. You sigh and moan with pleasure and I can tell you are becoming aroused. I slide one hand down to your nether region and caress your mound, wet with desire. I spread your labia apart and run my fingers up and down your moist slit before circling your pleasure button. You moan louder as I keep up the rhythm on our clit and I alternate pinching and massaging your nipples with my other hand. You writhe all over me as you build toward your orgasm. I am so turned on right now and my cock is aching to be inside you. I know you want me inside as well but you are so close to orgasm and you are driven by your need. I continue playing with your clit and massaging your breasts and with a final gasp you cum, screaming with release. I nearly cum myself, so turned on by your orgasmic beauty. You finally begin to come down from the height of your orgasm and you lay back on the bed. I know it's time to enter you and I position my erect cock at your entrance. You grab my hips and pull me in deep with one fluid motion and I gasp at the intensity of being inside your sopping, wet pussy. You smile at me and I am overcome by my need to have you. I kiss you hungrily as my hips thrust in and out of their own accord. You moan and kiss me back, your nipples pressing against my chest. I am an animal now, unable to temper my desire. You meet my every thrust, your pussy squeezing and massaging my aching cock. Soon I can feel my impending orgasm and with a few final thrusts I explode deep inside you, shooting my load hard against your cervix, setting you off again and your moans mix with mine. As we both come down from our emotional high, we collapse in each other's arms. We cuddle together and continue touching each other, relaxing before we begin another round. Can you imagine a better way to wake up?
Written by: Eward920778 (use to be his handle on this site)
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Blown Movie Date
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Posted:Jun 8, 2008 10:18 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2008 10:58 pm
25122 Views
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Christine has an independent streak and at times she needs to be disciplined. She is hard to control sometimes though, being a full figured woman who oozes sexuality. She has a fair complexion, jet black hair, a gorgeous ass, and full, ripe breasts. Her face is pleasant to look at, with freckles and luscious lips that know how to kiss and work over a cock. Because she is so beautiful, I let many of her indiscretions slide. However, she sometimes pushes my buttons and tries to take advantage of my leniency and I need to put her back in her place like a . Because of that, I bought a riding crop to punish her the next time she got out of line.It wasn't long after I purchased the riding crop that Christine gave me a reason to put it to use. We had made plans to watch a movie but she either forgot or simply blew me off. I fumed when I came home after work to find her already gone out with a few of her friends. I had endured a particularly hard day and I was peeved that she had not let me know of the change of plans. I decided that I was going to punish her when she arrived home.Christine came home a few hours later and despite the fact that I was calmer now than before, I was still upset with her. I was both turned on and peeved at what she was wearing: a short skirt and corset top that framed and accentuated her assets. I wanted her but I needed to punish her first and as she bent to kiss me as I sat in my easy chair, I deftly handcuffed one wrist before she even realized what was happening. She was surprised and asked me what I was doing and I told her that she needed to be punished for forgetting about our movie date. Her temper flared and she ran toward the bedroom but I was hot on her heels and caught her just as she tried to shut the door behind her.I quickly grabbed her wrists and pinned her firmly against the wall. She squirmed under my grip but I held tight, pushing my body against hers. She continued to struggle but I had the leverage I needed to keep her under my control and with one hand, I unzipped her skirt and pulled it roughly down her legs, exposing her perfect ass, the view broken by the blue thong she was wearing. I pulled on it, forcing it to dig deeper into her ass crack and teasing her pussy slit. I felt Christine submit, as her thong pushed into her slit. I knew she was getting aroused but I wasn't ready to allow her complete pleasure. I slid my finger under her thong and worked it out of her slit and crack, pulling it down so that it slid down to her ankles. Her arousal filled the air and I inhaled her musky scent, turned on by her desire. I knew she would give herself to me now, fulfilling my every need. Nevertheless, I wanted her to know I was in control and would not allow any insubordination. I told her to stand spread eagle against the wall and as she obeyed me, I fetched my riding crop. I told Christine she needed to be punished for disobedience and without further warning, I let the crop fly across her taut ass. She gasped as the stinging pain shot through her with each stroke and it wasn't long before I had turned her ass cheeks a lovely red shade. Christine was a good girl and took her punishment well, barely flinching as I spanked her. It wasn't long before I saw the telltale glisten of her pussy juices running down her thighs. She was aching for my manhood, knowing that I could not resist her juicy ass and abundant breasts. I made Christine finish undressing herself, exposing her lovely tits and erect nipples. I longed to suckle on them but I needed to tease her a bit longer. I told her to get on her knees and service me and she pouted a bit but did as she was told. She unzipped my pants and pulled them down to my knees, freeing my raging hard on. She began to suck on my cock and fondling my nut sack. Normally I would let her work my cock but tonight I was going to push her further and without warning I grabbed her hair and forced my cock deeper than it had ever gone before. Christine looked up at me with pleading eyes as she struggled to take my cock in her mouth but I ignored the plea and fucked her mouth, working my way deeper and deeper. Christine reached down to play with her clit but I smacked her hand with the riding crop and she whimpered with frustrated desire. I continued to fuck her mouth and felt my building orgasm and Christine sensed I was close as well and she sucked my rod with renewed enthusiasm. At the last possible second I pulled out of her mouth and finished all over her gorgeous tits and I could see that she was unhappy that I had wasted my hot cream instead of feeding her. I carefully took a towel and cleaned my cock of all cum and then shoved it back in her mouth, commanding her to suck it and get it hard again. Christine looked very frustrated now, as I had never held back this long from her before. It didn't take long before Christine got my cock hard again and I was ready to allow her to have her pleasure. I pushed her flat on her tummy on the bed and shoved my cock deep inside her sopping wet pussy. She moaned and bucked up to meet my thrust but I pushed her back on the bed and leaned over her to bite her lower shoulders and upper back, leaving hard marks on her. I told her she could finally play with her clit and as she did, I felt her pussy tighten around my rod. I kept shoving my cock deep inside her, massaging her G-spot with each thrust. I knew that because she had been tormented for so long she would cum hard and soon I felt her building orgasm as she fingered her clit faster and faster. I sat up on her thighs as my cock lay inside her and began to spank her ass and back, leaving red marks that contrasted nicely with her creamy white skin. Then with the ferocity of an animal, I forced my cock in as deep as I could just as she began to cum. Christine screamed with release but I kept up the deep fucking as wave after wave of pleasure swept over her and bliss washed over her. Her pussy pulsated and I felt her massage my cock as I began to shoot my load within her pussy. She squirmed as each spurt hit her pussy walls and cervix, moaning with pleasure. I gripped her hips to steady myself before collapsing on her. My cock slipped out and as it did, our love juices flowed down her thighs, soaking the bed. She looked at me and told me she would be a good girl but I know better. It wouldn't be long before I would have to punish her again...
Written by: Eward920778 (use to be his handle on this site)
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To link to this blog (Rosebud322) use [blog Rosebud322] in your messages.
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