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Guest Book!
Posted:May 26, 2008 6:01 pm
Last Updated:Apr 19, 2017 1:55 am
Hey, I'm here. Please let me know who you are! So, please sign in. Would love to know who are or you can just say hello to me.

I have some very funny jokes, some funny tests and writing that I have done. Some writing done by friends of mine. Read and enjoy!

Leave a comment if you wish, would enjoy hearing what you think. Be nice please, but I do expect honesty, but there is no need to be mean. Most time I would not say anything but lately have found it best to say it...PLEASE BE RESPECTFUL...thank you

1 comment
Posted:May 28, 2008 1:03 pm
Last Updated:Dec 10, 2008 8:24 pm
Sex Stories
Hotel Excitement
Hotel Excitement Part 2
Sex Fun
My Fantasy With A Stranger
Unforgettable Night
First Meeting
A Night To Remember
One Night Of Passion

What A Tease
Me Again
Dream Club
My Dream Man
The Simple Things In Life
Afraid To Try
What Kind Of Spell Did You Put Me Under
Now and Forever
Under The Stars With You
True Friends
Goodnight Sleep Tight
Him And Her And Sex

Sex Stories and Peoms (Written By Friends)
San Joaquin County Fun Story
Must Read It is Beautiful
First Encounter
Unfinished StorySo Sad
For The Ladies
Blown Movie Date
Morning Sex

Sex Test or Funny Test (Questions)
What would you do if we had sex
Position Open Fuck Buddy
Friends With Benefits
Molested with Ice
Math Equation
Another Silly Birthday Thing
I cost 2,125, maybe a little silly but funny
How You Get OffTurn Ons
Just A Few Good Questions
Virginity Lost
Something New
For the LadiesOrgasms

Jokes and Funny Things
The Why
Babieshow funny
Hamburger is like Sex
Little Daniel
If We Had Sex
Business card
Old Woman
Cure for a cough
This is hilarious
A Mule, a Donkey, Or A
9 Words Women Use
Tax Time
Ha Ha Silly
Bubba and Leroy
Good trade
The LOVE Dress
So True
Dusty Underwearheehee
Jokes Daily
Joke ha ha
Grandpa and Grandma and Viagra
Women are Crazy or are they
Drinking With a Redneck Girl
Hillbilly Love Poem
Ladies Night
Bad Day At Work
Vibrator Versus Men
Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth
Nick the Dragon Slayer
What a Wife
Why Parents Have Gray Hair
Good to be a Woman
JOKES for the men and women
Baby Planes
Hospital Chart Bloopers
Short and Funny
Remember the great oneliners from Hollywood Squares
A Funny Email I Got
Some Funny Joke that Where Sent to Me
The Husband Store LOL
Butt Measurements
Hippie, Nun and the Bus Driver

Personal Thoughts
Married Men and Lies
While I'm Still In A Mood
JerksMixed With Friends
My Thought for Today
Who is True
Delete Friends
What the Fuck
Standard Member
TrustNo Means No
My Last Blog 92507
Life Goes On
Innocent Comment
I Think to Much
Weather, How Nice
Friday Is Here, With My Birthday
Test This Morning
No Responsible
Just Another Day
Test DayWent Well
The Truth Won Out
Crazy Mood Or NotOh Yesss
Mostly An Uneventful Weekend
Second Day Back
Heard But Not Heard
What A Weekend
Just Talking Nothing Important
From Meet to Bed
Computer Troubles
Wish Me Luck
Update to Wish Me Luck

Other Interesting Things
Just Plain Wrong
Income Tax Rebate Check Schedule

Hippie, Nun and the Bus Driver
Posted:Oct 22, 2008 11:38 pm
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2009 9:53 am

Got this from a friends blogs, he is so funny. You should check out his blog if you have the check, JHinTracy. He is so cool.

A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.

The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop.

When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."

The hippie, of course, says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord.

"If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."

The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.

The nun agrees, but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.

After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie!"

The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"

Bet you didn't see that coming!!!!

1 comment
Butt Measurements
Posted:Oct 22, 2008 10:46 pm
Last Updated:Nov 11, 2008 9:46 pm

Got this from one of my groups, thought it was funny. Had to share, enjoy.

A man and his wife were working in their garden one day and the man looks over at his wife and says: "Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big. I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue."

With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom.

"Yes,I was right; your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!"

The woman chose to ignore her husband.

Later that night in bed,the husband is feeling a little frisky...

He makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks.
She answers: "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?

Update to Wish Me Luck!!!
Posted:Sep 20, 2008 10:15 pm
Last Updated:Oct 22, 2008 10:40 pm

My luck has not been to good as far as this goes...

I have been trying for weeks to quit smoking but is not worked to good. My will power has not been all that strong. I seem to do well when I'm away from my house but here my will power just seems to go.

I know I can do it. Because when I am away from home I don't smoke but I come home or go to work and I have an over powering feeling of having to smoke.

But I have not given up yet. I'm still going to keep trying and one of these days I will have the will power to not smoke at all. But if anyone has a good idea that might help I would love to hear it.

Wish Me Luck!!!
Posted:Aug 3, 2008 11:42 am
Last Updated:Sep 20, 2008 10:08 pm

So much has been happening lately. This last week I was talking to a friend about quitting smoking. I have so many reason to quit but the biggest one right now is that I just can't afford to buy them anymore. But my friend had just quit himself and he was telling me that I should just pick a day and do it. So, that is what I did. I pick a day.

So, as of yesterday I have quit. I have done really well, I must say. Went all day yesterday without a smoke. But I was disappointed in myself last night. Messed up and had one before bed...could have just kick myself for that one. But this morning I got up and started again. Have not had one yet today. So, I have not given up, I guess we all fall sometimes, just have to keep trying.

Someone once told me, of course she was talking about something else, but I guess it works for this and a few many other things too. She told me that it is not a shame to fall off the wagon, the shame is not getting back on and trying again. I'm going to keep trying. I started smoking when I was fourteen. That is a long time to be smoking, it will take time for me to get out of the habit. Does anyone have a pen cap?....haha!

Wish me luck...I'm not giving up this time.

Computer Troubles
Posted:Aug 3, 2008 11:12 am
Last Updated:Sep 7, 2008 10:51 pm

Hi, Everyone.

I know it has been a long time since I posted in my blogs. And have not posted much in my groups either and have not been in chat for three weeks now for TMTM. And I have taken a few days even to answer my e-mails at times. There is a reason for that. I have gotten e-mail and calls asking me why. So, I decide to take the time to tell everyone that reads my blogs, there is a reason.

I have not disappered, I am here. Just not as much as I once was since I have been having trouble with my computer. Has not been working for me. I have been trying to get it fix but right now time has not been on my side for that. But I hope soon that I will be able to get my computer fixed. But until than I have had to use my sister-in-law's computer. Which means I have to use it when I can. She does online schooling so she uses her computer a lot. So, when I get the chance to use her computer I do. But I don't always have a lot of time to do much. I should just be happy I can get on at times and I am. It is just a pain that I can't get on whenever I want to.

Then of course with all that I also went back to work this week...how fun. Been a pretty crazy week too.

Working now...I'm so happy!!!

Morning Sex
Posted:Jun 8, 2008 10:25 pm
Last Updated:Jan 1, 2009 2:41 pm

The door was unlocked, just as you had promised. I let myself in, being careful to enter as silently as possible so as not to disturb you. I hurriedly undress before entering the bedroom. There you are, asleep, covered only by a sheet. I admire your figure there on the bed. Perfect ass cheeks begging to be caressed, the curve of your back calling me to be next to you. I hesitantly enter your bed, not wishing to wake you from your slumber. You stir and release a small moan, as if from a dream of ecstasy. Your body meets mine and I wrap my arm over you, my hand coming to rest on your bosom. You smile gently, not fully awake yet. I can not resist your abundant breast and almost without thinking I fondle it. Your gasp with pleasure, beginning to awaken now. You arch your back and press your round ass against my already stirring cock. I meet your desire and my cock slips between your ass cheeks. Both my arms are around you now, fondling your breasts, my cock throbbing between your ass cheeks, my mouth nibbling on the nape of your neck and your ears. You sigh and moan with pleasure and I can tell you are becoming aroused. I slide one hand down to your nether region and caress your mound, wet with desire. I spread your labia apart and run my fingers up and down your moist slit before circling your pleasure button. You moan louder as I keep up the rhythm on our clit and I alternate pinching and massaging your nipples with my other hand. You writhe all over me as you build toward your orgasm. I am so turned on right now and my cock is aching to be inside you. I know you want me inside as well but you are so close to orgasm and you are driven by your need. I continue playing with your clit and massaging your breasts and with a final gasp you cum, screaming with release. I nearly cum myself, so turned on by your orgasmic beauty. You finally begin to come down from the height of your orgasm and you lay back on the bed. I know it's time to enter you and I position my erect cock at your entrance. You grab my hips and pull me in deep with one fluid motion and I gasp at the intensity of being inside your sopping, wet pussy. You smile at me and I am overcome by my need to have you. I kiss you hungrily as my hips thrust in and out of their own accord. You moan and kiss me back, your nipples pressing against my chest. I am an animal now, unable to temper my desire. You meet my every thrust, your pussy squeezing and massaging my aching cock. Soon I can feel my impending orgasm and with a few final thrusts I explode deep inside you, shooting my load hard against your cervix, setting you off again and your moans mix with mine. As we both come down from our emotional high, we collapse in each other's arms. We cuddle together and continue touching each other, relaxing before we begin another round. Can you imagine a better way to wake up?

Written by: Eward920778 (use to be his handle on this site)
Blown Movie Date
Posted:Jun 8, 2008 10:18 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2008 10:58 pm

Christine has an independent streak and at times she needs to be disciplined. She is hard to control sometimes though, being a full figured woman who oozes sexuality. She has a fair complexion, jet black hair, a gorgeous ass, and full, ripe breasts. Her face is pleasant to look at, with freckles and luscious lips that know how to kiss and work over a cock. Because she is so beautiful, I let many of her indiscretions slide. However, she sometimes pushes my buttons and tries to take advantage of my leniency and I need to put her back in her place like a . Because of that, I bought a riding crop to punish her the next time she got out of line.It wasn't long after I purchased the riding crop that Christine gave me a reason to put it to use. We had made plans to watch a movie but she either forgot or simply blew me off. I fumed when I came home after work to find her already gone out with a few of her friends. I had endured a particularly hard day and I was peeved that she had not let me know of the change of plans. I decided that I was going to punish her when she arrived home.Christine came home a few hours later and despite the fact that I was calmer now than before, I was still upset with her. I was both turned on and peeved at what she was wearing: a short skirt and corset top that framed and accentuated her assets. I wanted her but I needed to punish her first and as she bent to kiss me as I sat in my easy chair, I deftly handcuffed one wrist before she even realized what was happening. She was surprised and asked me what I was doing and I told her that she needed to be punished for forgetting about our movie date. Her temper flared and she ran toward the bedroom but I was hot on her heels and caught her just as she tried to shut the door behind her.I quickly grabbed her wrists and pinned her firmly against the wall. She squirmed under my grip but I held tight, pushing my body against hers. She continued to struggle but I had the leverage I needed to keep her under my control and with one hand, I unzipped her skirt and pulled it roughly down her legs, exposing her perfect ass, the view broken by the blue thong she was wearing. I pulled on it, forcing it to dig deeper into her ass crack and teasing her pussy slit. I felt Christine submit, as her thong pushed into her slit. I knew she was getting aroused but I wasn't ready to allow her complete pleasure. I slid my finger under her thong and worked it out of her slit and crack, pulling it down so that it slid down to her ankles. Her arousal filled the air and I inhaled her musky scent, turned on by her desire. I knew she would give herself to me now, fulfilling my every need. Nevertheless, I wanted her to know I was in control and would not allow any insubordination. I told her to stand spread eagle against the wall and as she obeyed me, I fetched my riding crop. I told Christine she needed to be punished for disobedience and without further warning, I let the crop fly across her taut ass. She gasped as the stinging pain shot through her with each stroke and it wasn't long before I had turned her ass cheeks a lovely red shade. Christine was a good girl and took her punishment well, barely flinching as I spanked her. It wasn't long before I saw the telltale glisten of her pussy juices running down her thighs. She was aching for my manhood, knowing that I could not resist her juicy ass and abundant breasts. I made Christine finish undressing herself, exposing her lovely tits and erect nipples. I longed to suckle on them but I needed to tease her a bit longer. I told her to get on her knees and service me and she pouted a bit but did as she was told. She unzipped my pants and pulled them down to my knees, freeing my raging hard on. She began to suck on my cock and fondling my nut sack. Normally I would let her work my cock but tonight I was going to push her further and without warning I grabbed her hair and forced my cock deeper than it had ever gone before. Christine looked up at me with pleading eyes as she struggled to take my cock in her mouth but I ignored the plea and fucked her mouth, working my way deeper and deeper. Christine reached down to play with her clit but I smacked her hand with the riding crop and she whimpered with frustrated desire. I continued to fuck her mouth and felt my building orgasm and Christine sensed I was close as well and she sucked my rod with renewed enthusiasm. At the last possible second I pulled out of her mouth and finished all over her gorgeous tits and I could see that she was unhappy that I had wasted my hot cream instead of feeding her. I carefully took a towel and cleaned my cock of all cum and then shoved it back in her mouth, commanding her to suck it and get it hard again. Christine looked very frustrated now, as I had never held back this long from her before. It didn't take long before Christine got my cock hard again and I was ready to allow her to have her pleasure. I pushed her flat on her tummy on the bed and shoved my cock deep inside her sopping wet pussy. She moaned and bucked up to meet my thrust but I pushed her back on the bed and leaned over her to bite her lower shoulders and upper back, leaving hard marks on her. I told her she could finally play with her clit and as she did, I felt her pussy tighten around my rod. I kept shoving my cock deep inside her, massaging her G-spot with each thrust. I knew that because she had been tormented for so long she would cum hard and soon I felt her building orgasm as she fingered her clit faster and faster. I sat up on her thighs as my cock lay inside her and began to spank her ass and back, leaving red marks that contrasted nicely with her creamy white skin. Then with the ferocity of an animal, I forced my cock in as deep as I could just as she began to cum. Christine screamed with release but I kept up the deep fucking as wave after wave of pleasure swept over her and bliss washed over her. Her pussy pulsated and I felt her massage my cock as I began to shoot my load within her pussy. She squirmed as each spurt hit her pussy walls and cervix, moaning with pleasure. I gripped her hips to steady myself before collapsing on her. My cock slipped out and as it did, our love juices flowed down her thighs, soaking the bed. She looked at me and told me she would be a good girl but I know better. It wouldn't be long before I would have to punish her again...

Written by: Eward920778 (use to be his handle on this site)
Your Favorite Part
Posted:May 28, 2008 9:53 am
Last Updated:Feb 11, 2009 5:18 pm

Just curious, what part of the boby on both men and women do you like best?

Leave a comment if you wish!

Face and Smile
Pussy or Cock
2 Comments , 27 votes
would you rather...
Posted:May 28, 2008 9:43 am
Last Updated:Feb 11, 2009 5:20 pm

Found this and thought it an interesting question. But a tough one for most...unless you know me.

If you had me in your room RIGHT NOW, would you rather?

Want me suck your cock?
Want to eat my pussy?
Fuck me hard right then and there?
Make sweet love to me?
Tell me to turn around and leave?
0 Comments , 17 votes
For the Ladies....Orgasms
Posted:May 28, 2008 9:33 am
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2009 6:10 am

How many of you can achieve orgasm? I've seen varying statistics in the past, but I just did a little research and saw a statistic saying that 10-15% of U.S. women can't have an orgasm.

Can you have an orgasm? I'm not talking about only during intercourse. I'm talking about using any type of stimulation, either alone or with a partner or using a vibrator, etc.
Yes, I have orgasms.
No, I don't have orgasms.
Maybe. I'm not sure.
I used to, but I can't anymore.
1 comment , 3 votes
Something New
Posted:May 27, 2008 9:32 pm
Last Updated:Apr 24, 2009 6:07 am

Everyone has different sexual experiences, if you had the opportunity to try something different, what would you try?
Double Penitration?
Gang Bang?
Couple Swap?
Girl on Girl Action?
Well Endowed Male?
Happy with just One on One?
1 comment , 9 votes

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