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SoundChaser's Blog
Posted:May 20, 2021 5:45 pm
Last Updated:May 20, 2021 7:13 pm
This is a Private mailbox for Standards or anyone else who would like leave a message in private via the comments...
Casual sex and emotional health
Posted:Nov 24, 2021 5:04 am
Last Updated:Dec 1, 2021 10:48 am

I came across an article in Psychology Today that should lift of our spirits! The outcome of a study about emotional health related casual came with this result,

"The authors primary finding was clear: 'In each study where authors tested the difference between positive and negative feelings, participants reported significantly more positive than negative feelings.'"

Not that I didn't know this before...

However, managing one's expectations is KEY. Casual is fun and can be satisfying, as well as embarrassing and unfulfilling, but if you're willing the game, the rewards are for the picking.
More than just friends
Posted:Jun 23, 2021 7:53 pm
Last Updated:Nov 24, 2021 5:12 am
Continuing my personal Secret Life

There are some common "rules" that are often mentioned when it comes swinging. One of them is not have sex with your neighbors since, if something goes awry, you still have live next them. Another is not fuck your existing friends. We were about ignore that last rule, but I do have say it created some great memories.

Swinging really set well with us. My wife and I imagined we'd found the perfect tonic for the doldrums of marriage and we were wanting to tell everyone about it. Well, not "everyone," but we took quite a few folks into our confidences and we stopped worrying about being "found out" and just enjoyed ourselves.

One of the friends we told were a couple our own age that I'd easily say were one of our two best-friend couples. We'd been hanging out for a few years and we had a lot of similar interests. We also occasionally flirted a bit with each other's spouses but since they were "vanilla" friends, we never imagined anything more than that. This couple, Sam (Samantha) and Kaj were really interested in the whole scene and wanted to know how the house parties worked. We let them know the details and after awhile, they let us know that they wanted to give it a try, too.

So we found ourselves one evening giving the tour of the party house to our friends. The evening was another where there weren't a large number of couples and most of those who showed-up were members of other cliques, so we ended up out on the couches in the living room just chatting with our friends, telling them that they just happened to show up on a down night and that they shouldn't consider it representative of a typical party.

My wife had partaken of a few glasses of wine by that time, and once she was buzzed, she would get very horny. She was sitting on the couch with Kaj while Sam and I were sitting on the floor with our backs to the couch...I realized that somehow we'd already paired-up (I suspect that was my wife's doing). As we were talking, my wife was caressing Kaj and his eyes were getting bigger and bigger as she got closer and closer to his obvious hard-on. Both Sam and myself were watching this activity and my wife suddenly sighed and said, "C'mon guys...if we're going to do it, let's do it!" and that broke the ice. My wife promptly unbuttoned and unzipped Kaj's slacks and brought out his very large, thick cock. I remember my wife cooing, "Lucky me!"

Sam laughed at that and followed my wife's lead, opening up my slacks and freeing my cock where she proceeded to give me exquisite head. I love it when a woman uses her hands and her mouth and Sam was adept at that technique, probably due to her having to manage Kaj's very large member which my wife told me would cause her jaw to tire out quickly due to its girth. I caught eyes with Kaj for a moment and he just lifted his eyebrows and made a face that said, "what the fuck!" but nobody was stopping.

Now, I'd found Sam very attractive for a very long time. She was without a doubt a secret fantasy of mine with her compact gymnast-like body and a twinkling smile. I once was alone with her at her and Kaj's house as I waited for him to get home from work, and we'd flirted harmlessly...but that was the source of many a fantasy about how things could have gone if we let the flirting move further. Now, here she was in my lap, slurping my hard cock into her mouth, coating it slickly so her hands would glide up and down the shaft effortlessly. It was fantasy magic.

Up on the couch, my wife had tired of trying to suck Kaj's huge cock so she discarded her panties, told him to condom-up, and straddled him, easing herself onto his throbbing shaft. My wife is a very small woman so accommodating the huge cock took a little effort, but I was transfixed watching her take him in little by little until she was moving up and down on him, fully enveloping his girth inside of her. As she moved, she unbuttoned her top and threw it across the room, her small breasts now in Kaj's appreciative face.

Sam noticed the change in movement from the couch and she chose to follow in my wife's footsteps by slipping out of her underwear (at which point, I discarded my pants and found my own condom). With one smooth motion, she straddled me and slid down upon my cock, taking me inside her completely. I remember thinking, "of course, since she's used to Kaj's huge cock." It was interesting though, because Sam liked to watch her husband at play as much as I liked to watch my wife fucking other men. We actually moved ourselves so that we could both easily have sex with each other, but also see our spouses fucking hungrily on the couch.

When it was over and we all collapsed in a naked, caressing heap together on the couch, we all ended up admitting that we'd all had fantasies about each other in the past. And from that day-on, they became part of the The Couch People. Kaj and Sam were also regular partners outside of the parties, both at their home and ours. They had married right after high school and had only had sex with each other for their entire marriage, so this was their first chance to try everything on their fantasy bucket list, and my wife and I tried to keep up with them the best we could.

I wish I could say it all stayed wine and roses, but Kaj and Sam had other issues with their personal relationship that eventually had them divorce when Kaj started taking liberties and seeing other women without telling Sam. Around that time, my wife and I had chosen to open up our marriage to allow each other more freedom and Kaj was seeing my wife, saying that it was "OK" with Sam...but he was lying. So, the friendship imploded when it all came out.

Thus, there is the rule not to fuck your friends. I'm sure it doesn't always go sideways, but it did in this case. Nonetheless, I have many, many good memories of times with them exploring fantasies that still bring a smile to my face and a lift to my cock.
A party life produces a party brain
Posted:Jun 23, 2021 6:54 pm
Last Updated:Jan 22, 2022 6:41 pm
Continuing my personal Secret Life

The whirlwind of parties begins take it's toll on my memory at this point. We'd been going for about a year and we had our "regulars" that we'd hook up with and there'd be occasional new members with which we'd have fun. A few of the new members only have blips my memory like the couple Patricia and Tom. We ended up being fantastic friends with them, meeting with them commonly for non-sexual purposes, but for the life of me, I can't recall our first sexual meeting at the parties. I do recall one evening after we'd known them for some time, where I was at loose ends on a bed of writhing bodies, and Patricia appeared out of nowhere, smiled broadly, and slurped my cock into her mouth with no other preamble. We ended up fucking happily on that bed amidst other couples happily fucking. I also remember a private party at their house where they instigated making a "sundae" out of your partner and the whole group of us decided by the end of it all that whipped cream and chocolate sauce really belonged on ice cream, not bodies. Live and learn.

There was a French couple who became part of our groups. The wife was a large-eyed beauty who spoke almost no English. Her husband told stories about the clubs they frequented in Paris when they were at home and how they were so much more risque than could be found here in the US. She was extremely thin and I recall wondering if she would break in two when we connected one evening.

There was a dirty blonde housewife who I played with on a couple of occasions. I recall her sitting on a chair in the party-house's living room, her skirt pulled up and panties pushed aside as I went down on her in front of the assembled couples who were milling about.

It was about this time that the semi-clique I was part of began being referred-to by the regular clientele as "the couch people" since we tended to invade the living room once things got going and having our fun out in the open in front of everyone. The exhibitionist side of us really came out at these events and the leather couches were a perfect place to let our freak flag fly high!

When I next remember a full experience, it was with a woman I'd noticed a number of times before at the events. She and her husband were likely in their early 50's, so they tended not to hang out with us mid 30-somethings. However, if you've been following my blog, you know I have a thing for older women, and this woman had something about her that just fizzed my hormones. She certainly had fantastic breasts that she was very-good at putting on display. She also used a body moisturizer that left a slight glitter to her skin, too, so her beautifully presented cleavage seemed to be flashing with diamonds and I would find myself glancing again and again. I really wanted to touch her...

So one night when my wife went off with a hookup, I found this fantasy woman sitting chatting with her husband. I ventured up to them and told her I found her very attractive and I wondered if they'd like to play. She looked a bit surprised at the offer (the couch people are calling!!) but she and her husband checked in with each other, nodded, and we cavorted into the downstairs bedroom where we began to get each other into the mood with touches and kisses. Her husband mostly sat back and watched as we slowly disrobed and those amazing, glittering globes were finally in my hands.

Now, I am the first to admit, I am a breast guy. Sizes and shapes don't matter to me since I love them all but occasionally a pair just has something about them that is completely without definition that makes them slightly above the rest, and this woman was blessed with that "something." I'm sure she probably sucked my cock, but I can only remember being transfixed by her luscious boobs and I made sure that when we fucked, that she was on top so I could watch her and touch her as she rode me.

I never knew her name but it was so much fun to make a fantasy come true since I'd desired her for many evenings, but usually something just got in the way of my following-up on my desires.

The only other memory that comes to mind was a young couple with whom I wouldn't get to fully cavort. The early 20-something couple was at the party for their first time and while I noticed them immediately due to their attractiveness, I had written them off, thinking that she was out of my league. She was extremely cute, nicely shaped (between thin and slightly overweight), and she was quite bubbly. My wife commented on the husband being attractive, too, but as I noted, I didn't imagine we'd have a chance.

I recall that evening was pretty lightly attended, so my wife and I were just enjoying the party for the sake of the party, but we'd not really found anyone we thought we'd connect with. We were sitting in the living room when the young couple sat down with us and we started chatting. After we'd conversed a bit, the young woman, very wide-eyed, asked suddenly if we'd like to play with them. I probably looked surprised, but since my wife and I had already mentioned to each other that we found the couple attractive, my wife was already reaching for the husband's hand and heading toward the bedroom!

We claimed the California king bed in the master bedroom and each took a side on which to play. The young woman and I kissed deeply, our hands running over each other's bodies excitedly. I remember thinking she was very unpracticed, and she was also rushing things a bit. Nonetheless things progressed as they typically do, a blouse discarded, pants slipped off, a bra removed, a skirt flung into a corner, and as she slipped her panties down, she sat back on the bed to remove them over her feet and I lightly pushed her onto her back, spread her legs and went down on her.

She started moaning almost immediately. Then she started thrashing about, writhing, and I had to try to keep up with her undulating body as I tried to keep my mouth in contact with her pussy. All my concentration was in riding things out with her when suddenly she pushed me away and yelled, "FUCK ME NOW!"

With all the concentration I was giving to providing her pleasure, the last thing I was really feeling was turned-on and my cock was not at all ready to "fuck her now." And since I never had sex without a condom, there was nothing to do but suggest we do something that resembled less a ship on a stormy sea to get me back into the game. Unfortunately, she saw this moment as an affront, a loud and clear message that she wasn't sexy, and she stormed away in a huff and hid in the master bathroom.

Her husband, his cock in my wife's hand, was kneeling on the bed with his mouth open in astonishment. He apologized profusely and went to talk with his offended wife, but that was the end of that experience. And while I know that pretty young woman was not a flag-bearer for all younger, sexually inexperienced women, I've not spent any further time seeking out sex with those significantly younger than me.
Posted:Jun 15, 2021 7:40 pm
Last Updated:Nov 24, 2021 5:30 am

Continuing my personal Secret Life

Warning...there is some description of guy-guy action in this post, so if you are against that, you may wish move along...nothing see here.

The house parties continued and the experiences continued make and my wife more and more comfortable with sharing each other. On this one night, we showed around a newbie couple, both in their early 40s, an auburn-haired wife with a very tight knit dress that enhanced her very large breasts and her husband, an attractive, thin, brown-haired accountant-type. They asked the typical questions about how things tend flow and we gave them our typical advice of "don't have any expectations and you won't be disappointed." We checked about their rules make sure they'd talked about what they would do if something did happen and they appeared have things well-managed.

They went wandering off and my wife and I began take stock of the other couples who had arrived. Our general mode of operations at this time was to see if we found any new couples attractive, then them see what might transpire, and if that didn't pan-out, we'd fall back our -faithful friends. our friends had this unspoken arrangement, so that we typically ended finding fun one way or another at most parties.

About halfway through the night, we found ourselves chatting with the new couple we'd shown around earlier. The wife was the aggressive one with the couple and she suggested that we head the private room and have some fun. My partner and I checked in with each other and she nodded, and I was more than happy canoodle with the well-stacked wife.

My wife and I were really good with new couples, giving them the space and time progress with things their own terms and we'd do what we could provide them with the chance communicate how they were feeling, in case things weren't quite what they expected when things started getting hot and heavy. We really planned using our "new the block" style, but as the door closed, the stacked wife whipped off her tight dress in a single movement so she was standing in a thong and an overworked bra that barely kept her huge breasts in check. I didn't have a chance do anything but smile as she slid and pressed her body against mine, kissing deeply.

I have always been highly attracted women who were -front with their desires, so her brazen movements had me hard in an instant. She rubbed my cock through my slacks as we continued making out, my hands trailing across her shapely body.

I glanced over at my wife and the husband see they were already the bed, him his back with his pants down, his cock standing at attention, and my wife stroking him softly. I watched momentarily as she slid her mouth down over him and the husband made the obligatory gasp of appreciation.

The well-shaped woman in my arms was watching my wife go down on her husband and egging him on, saying things like, "You like that, don't you honey? Is her mouth good? I know you like it!" Then she turned to me and asked, "Doesn't that look good?" and I figured that was going to be the moment she pulled out my cock..but I was mistaken.

The woman slipped away from me and got on the bed next her husband and got everyone's attention by saying, "Hey , we have a fantasy and want know if you'll help us with it." I was so-wanting see those tits of hers released from that confining bra, I was willing do just about anything, so we shrugged and asked what she had in mind.

She looked at her husband for a moment smiling and answered, "John here has always wanted see what it was like have a guy suck his cock..would you do that?" she asked looking at me while running her hands over her breasts. My wife still had the husband's cock in her hand and the surprise was not concealed on her face.

Now, when you're swinging and especially when guys are pleasuring one woman, guys will sometimes touch each other. Different guys have different reactions to this with most swingers falling on the side of just not paying any attention to it. I'd even had one woman shove my cock and her husband's into her mouth at the same time, so there was no way for us not to be touching each other's boners. I didn't find any of those situations exciting in particular, but they also didn't turn me off. The main key was that there was a woman in the mix that was getting-off on what was happening.

So when my wife cocked her head and asked if I wanted to try, her hand still holding his cock, I found myself being more curious than anything else, so I said "sure, let's try." After all, there was a majorly stacked woman that would be my party favor afterward.

So I sucked a cock. It turned him on immensely and it also seemed make his wife even more turned-on than before. I have gay friends who like to say things to straight guys like, "how do you know you won't like it unless you try it" - usually to get a rise from those straight guys. So I tried it. And I can't say it turned me on - but it was very nice seeing he and his wife getting very excited about the situation. I have a pleaser personality, so making others turned-on makes happy. And frankly, as long as there is a woman involved in the mix, I've not turned-away a bit of oral during my swinging days (sharing a cock at the same time with a woman is actually a turn-on ). So I admit it opened a new avenue of fun for and I found that I'm not fully heterosexual the Kinsey scale. I didn't find this at distressing.

Unfortunately, that's about that happened during that connection. My wife was chatting with the stacked beauty as I worked on my technique and suddenly, my wife asked stop. She said she wasn't comfortable with the situation and that she was sorry, but we should stop and go our separate ways. The primary rule we had as a couple was that if one of us was not comfortable, both of us were obliged to say good-night to our partners. The couple was crestfallen, and I lamented not getting to further explore those amazing tits, but we apologized, gathered our clothes and made our way out of the room (that's right...we didn't dress...but that wasn't unusual for us).

Later, my wife would tell me as she was chatting with the buxom woman it was revealed that there was no plan for there to be anything else to happen except some guy/guy action...that was their fantasy. The couple used the buxom wife to lure us into the situation but she had no intention of doing anything more than get her husband a blowjob that evening. Tacky...and the couple got even weirder later in the evening when they called the police on the party, claiming that there were people paying for sex on the premises. Our hosts had the last laugh as they showed the police around the house and explained the situation, and they ended up giving their card to one of the cops, who later showed up with his wife a few weeks later!

I don't recall what else happened that night, but this experience was pivotal in making me realize how fluid sexuality can be. And no, it didn't turn me into a raging cock-hound. But it did cause me to respect women more who enjoyed sucking cock.
Cum one, Cum all!
Posted:Jun 14, 2021 6:56 pm
Last Updated:Jun 15, 2021 5:44 am
Continuing my personal Secret Life

There were a number of experiences at parties where I was able enjoy Gabriela. Then she and her husband scheduled a party at their own house with some of their friends. My wife and I were invited but on the day of the event, my wife came down with a cold, so she bowed-out. I called Gabriela and let her know we were going have cancel, but she asked if I could come alone. I checked with my wife and she told me to go have a good time.

Since my wife and I rarely swung together, it wouldn't be all that different for me to be a single in a house of mostly couples. I arrived and was introduced to the other attendees. Most were around Gabriela's age - in their late 20's or early 30's making me one of the oldest there (at the time in my late-30's). We all sat around talking and drinking wine or beer, just getting to know each other. The women then got on a topic that I've never enjoyed: their experiences with guys who suffered a temporary erectile issue. The women laughed at the usual "you can't shove a rope" jokes and us guys nervously laughed along.

Happily, it wasn't to be a problem that evening, but there was a different failure to come...

Things started off by a couple of the women who were sitting together and touching each other suggestively all evening finally giving-in to the sexual tension and beginning to make-out heavily. It was like a bell went off and our clothes suddenly disappeared and the group moved into the bedroom. There were bodies all over the bed, on the floor, and in a large chair in the corner and I let things get started, not having a specific partner of my own. As mouths found other mouths or cocks or pussies or breasts, the sounds of pleasure filled the room. A woman who was on her back, licking and sucking on a guy's twitching cock, motioned for me to join them and I smiled and kneeled before her, sliding my hands inside her thighs and pressing on her light patch of pubic hair. She raised her hips from the bed and I took the hint to move my head between her legs and lightly licked around the edges of her pussy, teasing her.

With a laugh, she grabbed my head and shoved my mouth against her sex where I happily teased, licked, and sucked on her slippery lips. In retrospect, I should have taken the hint the she liked things more forceful and teasing wasn't her style. A common problem with swinging is that you don't really have the communication that might occur between longer-term lovers. Most of my lovers had been more sensually focused, so this woman who was into the SLAM-BANG aspects of sex found my teasing style less than enticing. Unfortunately, she didn't know how to communicate that and just pushed me away and grabbed someone else (where she proceeded to moan, "This guy REALLY knows how to lick pussy").

So I learned something interesting that night - that the number of different preferences for sexual styles is about as varied as people. While there are some adequate starting for any sexual act, try say that "this way of licking pussy/fucking/fingering/etc. will turn on every woman" is utterly preposterous. I also found that shame someone sexually is pretty darn tacky in the swinging world. NEVER think that just because you experience something in one way that it is the same experience for everyone else.

The bed of writhing bodies continued move about and I found myself sucking on nipples, licking other, more appreciative pussies and eventually Gabriela ended up on top of with my cock buried deep inside of her. I love having a woman ride as I can watch/touch her body AND I can last and last without worrying about going over the edge of the orgasm. Any bad feelings about the evening were blasted away as I looked about myself at the bodies in all sorts of sexual congress, then back at the caramel-colored beauty in my lap. She held my hands tightly to her breasts, mumbling Spanish phrases of pleasure as she used my cock to pleasure herself.

Later in the evening, as the attendees began calling it a night and wandering home, Gabriela had planted me next to her on the couch and kept me pinned where I was with her legs across mine. I could languidly stroke her perfect skin as we bade good-bye to the others. When it was just the of us (Gabriela, her husband and myself), she led back the bedroom where we all melded into one moving body, her husband and myself pleasuring Gabriela from all directions. Between moans, licks, kisses, touches and sucking, it came out that I'd not cum yet that evening. Gabriela's eyes opened wide with excitement and she pulled me on top of her and she ordered me to fuck her and cum inside of her (we always used condoms).

Who was I to say no? The evening ended with a powerful orgasm with my favorite fantasy woman.
1 comment
Gabriela, Clove and Cinnamon
Posted:May 20, 2021 6:48 pm
Last Updated:Jun 14, 2021 6:47 pm
Continuing my own "My Secret Life" story

Continued from the last post...

The party wore on and my wife and I hadn't found anyone that particularly aroused us. I let her know that Gabriela was a complete fantasy woman for me and my wife looked-over the husband and said she wasn't not attracted to him. Even then, I didn't imagine Gabriela would share herself with me.

Imagine my surprise when later in the evening while my wife and I were outside chatting with each other, Gabriela and her husband approached us. My eye had been hungrily watching her throughout the evening and I had noticed they'd talked with a lot of people, but her sparkly dress had stayed put upon her shapely body.

We sat outside and we chatted for close to an hour, really hitting it off. Gabriela and my wife were really similar and they became fast friends, a friendship that would extend outside of the party later-on. All the while, couples would wander by in different states of undress, or to jump in/out of the hot tub.

Then out of nowhere, Gabriela said, "You know, we really like you guys - it looks like the hot tub is empty. Want to go in?"

Having learned from my mind-blowing experience with Mary (a previous post), I somehow managed to keep my cool as my wife and I exchanged our silent assent to each other and she answered, "Sure!"

We all got up and moved to the hot tub where we undressed, still chatting amicably like it was the most normal thing in the world to get naked with strangers. Gabriela led us all in and as she sat down, she held out her hand to me so she could guide me to sit beside her. My wife did the same to the husband and we silently basked in the churning warm water for a bit. Gabriela had ditched her glasses before entering the steaming water and I gazed upon her face and its perfect skin. Her eyes opened and noticed me looking at her and she smiled, put her hand behind my neck and pulled me in to kiss her. I pivoted on the seat to make it easier to continue kissing and our legs entangled for a moment, and then she lifted hers over mine so she was essentially sitting in my lap, my aching cock pulsing against her thigh.

I let my hand that was resting on her waist slide upward and cup her breast as we kissed. She whispered "yes" against my lips and grabbed my hand making me squeeze her and she somehow guided my thumb and forefinger to tightly pinch her nipple. While I've never been reticent to make love TO a woman, I still love it when they feel comfortable enough to guide me toward giving them even more pleasure. From talking with many women through the years, so many of them have told me about bad experiences with big-ego men getting offended when the woman tried to guide the guy's actions. I've never had that problem and apparently Gabriela either never came across such big-ego, small-confidence men, or perhaps she just didn't give a shit. She wanted to get off and she was going to make sure her lover knew how to get her off.

That's when she started speaking in Spanish to me as her passion began to take over. I was doing great managing to keep my cool as this amazing woman checked off the fulfillment of one, then another fantasy. The only moment that wasn't perfect is when she straddled me and guided my cock to her pussy. She was so wet that I slid in to the hilt in one movement, but hot tubs aren't good for keeping things lubricated. The chlorine just strips away the natural slipperyness of things. We laughed at the situation and she jumped up on the edge of the tub and spread her extremely limber legs, encouraging me in Spanish to come fuck her.

I moved between her legs and slid back inside and this time things were much better. Her tanned and toned body moved beneath me and she grabbed my hands, shoving them forcefully onto her breasts and crushing my hands closed upon them. She was now lying back upon the deck around the hot tub while I was still standing in the water, so things sloshed and splashed which seemed appropriate as my cock bathed in the sweet smoothness of her very wet pussy. She kept telling me, "Fuck me Papi!" which for the non-Spanish speakers is, "Fuck me Daddy."

All during the experience, she was cumming again and again making her my first multi-orgasmic partner. When I finally realized she was going to keep cumming, I timed her and my orgasm so that we actually came at (darn close) to the same time...another first for me since my wife never climaxed from fucking (we were good friends with a powerful vibrator, though, so she could climax afterward).

After I came and slid out of her exquisite pussy, she sat up and we kissed, with her panting against my mouth. She then took my hand and placed it back on her pussy and she looked me directly in the eyes as she let me know she wanted me to play with her clit and make her cum again. We held as close as we could with my hand between us rubbing circles on her clit as she continued to kiss me, mumble nonsense, and spit out Spanish at me. Then her kisses stopped and her eyes locked mine once again and her face took on a look of certain climax, but this was different from those she had during sex. This climax was huge and I rode it out with her until she pulled my hand away and collapsed against me breathing heavily.

After a few moments of gathering her breath, she laughed lightly against my chest, then looked up at me smiling saying, "Oh yes...that was good..." and we both kissed again.

Only then did we look over to our spouses who were sitting watching us, both smiling broadly. My wife told us they'd finished earlier and were enjoying the show and we all laughed and climbed from the hot tub where we dried off, dressed, and exchanged telephone numbers and email addresses. My wife and Gabriela promised to make plans to get together. And with a few more kisses, we parted for the evening.

The detail I can remember about this experience with Gabriela is a bit surprising to me. But from a male-ego perspective, having such a fantasy woman share such an intimate time with me left a major mark on me. I still fantasize about her to this day, and I cherish the experience of that evening and the friendship we found in the coming months.
How do YOU do?
Posted:May 20, 2021 5:43 pm
Last Updated:May 26, 2021 10:25 am

Continuing my own "My Secret Life" story

Before I continue this story, I want to be clear that this story is not meant to be boastful in any way. I plan to outline each and every sexual connection I've had in my life mainly to give my own memory a workout. Swinging and polyamory has gifted to me a bounty of experiences that I want to set down. The lessons I learned from those experiences will also be listed here, again more-so to help them be etched into my psyche. If you happen to enjoy these missives, and if you learn anything from them, that's great. However, as I have grown older, I think it is important to look back over situations and view them from outside and above. Many of these things have a slightly different feel to them when I view them now with the eye of age.

And so, we continue.

The order that things occurred during our party days is largely a blur from this point-on. The parties were held every 3 weeks and my wife and I attended every one between 2001 and 2004. We became an alternate host and hostess, often taking-on the job of showing-around the newbies and explaining the rules of the house while the actual hosts kept an eye on other details. They even gifted us a certain number of free nights at the events since we helped-out so much.

So on this night, we arrived just a bit early help out with the setup and we planted ourselves in the kitchen where all guests were greeted as they entered through the back door of the home. A few regulars came in and we all caught up for a bit. Then a bit of a surprise occurred.

The next couple who came in were decidedly familiar, but not because we'd seen them at a previous party. No, we'd met them before outside of the swinging world at a very different and non-sexual event. I think most folks, when they're starting to swing, ask each other the question, "What if someone recognizes us?" We were about to find out exactly what happens! Initially, there was the awkward realization that we knew each other. Since we were so out-of-context with our previous meetings, it was not an instant realization how we knew each other. But we could see the lights come on as we all clicked that we had a connection in the vanilla world. And we laughed. That's about it. No drama. We never spoke about it outside the party when we saw each other.

After all, we'd seen EACH OTHER. We both had something on each other, so there wasn't anything to be gained "outing" the other couple since we'd be outed as well.

So, we just took them on the tour and gave them our presentation about the rules of the club and we headed back downstairs. And that's when I spotted Gabriela the first time, standing in the middle of the living room with her husband, chatting with the hosts. She was a vision of beauty, late 20's, long legs in high heels, wearing a sparkly and very short dress over a perfectly proportioned body. Her long curly brown/blonde hair fell over her shoulders and she possessed 2 of my sexual kryptonites: she wore glasses and was Hispanic.

I would find out later that she usually wore contacts, but that night some allergies were causing her some issues, so she decided to wear the glasses. I know that glasses don't mean anything in particular about a woman beyond that she needs to correct an eye issue, but a woman who chooses glasses over contacts suggests a sort-of personal confidence and care-not attitude toward the "establishment" that, more often than not, is exactly her attitude. It also makes her look smart and I am a sucker for an intelligent woman.

I don't have any idea why I have a thing for Hispanic women. However, I remember vividly the moment I realized it. When I was in high school, my family was eating out at our favorite Mexican restaurant and as we went to pay the check, I noticed the teenage girl behind the cash register. She was the most beautiful creature I'd ever laid eyes upon. She had the darkest eyes framed by long black hair and brown-caramel skin that I longed touch, just to prove to myself that its perfection was real. I was painfully shy at that time of my life (a problem I happily shucked thanks to my swinging experiences) and I did nothing but look at her beauty. It was to be a lifelong desire.

And here was a perfect example of such a woman standing in the middle of the party's living room. My wife and I approached so we could take them on the tour and we all introduced ourselves. Now, to be clear, I felt that I had zero chance with a woman this beautiful and I'd resigned myself to fantasizing about her as we led them through the house and showed them the amenities. As we chatted, we found that she was a personal trainer by trade (yes, she was THAT toned) and her husband was in IT, which meant he and I had something in common. When we finished the tour, we bid them good luck and left them to wander around and meet others.

We'll continue this one during the next post as this one is getting a bit long!
1 comment
Mary Tyler Moore-ish
Posted:May 19, 2021 4:55 pm
Last Updated:May 26, 2021 10:09 am
Continuing my own "My Secret Life" story

Early-on in our visits to the house party, I'd spied a woman who really caused my desire to go into overdrive. She was the spitting image of Mary Tyler Moore (search online for her, you younger bunch). She was also what I imagined to be the age of Mary Tyler Moore in 2001 (which was about 20 off...this gorgeous woman could only be in her early 50's at most). I let my wife know that I found her extremely attractive, but my wife didn't find the woman's husband at all exciting since he appeared be in his early 60's. be fair, my wife really went for younger guys.

Therefore, I was really not expecting ever be able connect with her. But one night when they appeared at the party, my wife wandered over and began chatting with them. By the time I'd joined her, she was well-into setting me up with Mary. My mind was so overwhelmed at the thought of just touching this unattainable beauty who connected so strongly to one of my earliest crushes (Mary Tyler Moore...keep up here...) I have no clue how she finagled the situation.

But before I knew it, Mary smiled at me, took my hand and led me upstairs to the private room. In the subdued light that our hosts set up in the room, we undressed and made small tal Mary was a goddess as I beheld her naked form. Where my wife had smaller breasts, Mary's were perfect for her small frame - neither too small nor too big. Her waist and hips were of a shape that would be coveted by porn stars. After my run of overweight women, Mary was so perfect to behold, my brain was short-circuiting.

Happily, my cock didn't follow suit and it leapt obediently to life as she squatted before me and took me in her mouth. I watched in awe as her brown eyes met mine while my shaft, now slick with her saliva, slid expertly in and out of her mouth. Happily, I have never had a problem lasting during oral sex since this blowjob with a fantasy woman would typically be the source of premature ejaculation in most cases. Mind you, while I love receiving oral sex tremendously, it takes a herculean effort by the woman to bring me off, and there have been precious few who have the patience to see it through (which is perfectly fine with me since I prefer orgasms gained from fucking).

I needed to touch her body and I lifted her from her squat and brought her close to me for a kiss, and feeling her small, perfectly proportioned body against mine was heaven. I led her to the bed where I laid her back and kissed my way down her body, lingering on her erect nipples, wandering across her flat belly, and sliding between her toned thighs to worship her pouting pussy.

My mind remembers those moments the most clearly - licking and sucking while hearing her whisper encouragement and guidance, her fingers weaved into my hair, pulling me against her, or moving me where she wanted me, my nose tickled by her small strip of well-manicured pubic hair that pointed suggestively at the treasures between her thighs.

Then somehow, I was on my back and she was straddling me, expertly slipping a condom over my straining coc Then with a smooth movement she was on me, her head back and mouth slack with the pleasure. The memory of that vision of her above me is something that I return whenever I need an extra shot of desire for any reason. This was a fantasy fuck come true, beyond anything I had ever experienced before. I spent half the time shocked at my luck, and the rest of the time reveling in touching this amazing body melding with mine.

We went through a few positions and I finished in a missionary atop her while kissing her deeply. Her eyes showed that she realized I was blown away by this experience and that she was both aroused and a bit amused. I know I was so distracted by being so turned-on that I had to have lost my usual sexual cool. But I wouldn't have traded it for anything. Next to having my very first sexual experience, this one was full-on synapse-bursting in its power over me.

Later, I would be able to use this experience to be a bit less overwhelmed when presented with female perfection in my arms. Mary was more interested in variety, so we never connected again, but as you can probably discern from this post, she left a major impression upon me.
Island Girl
Posted:May 19, 2021 2:46 pm
Last Updated:May 19, 2021 9:15 pm
Continuing my own "My Secret Life" story

My wife and I focused our swinging solely on the house party we'd happily discovered. My wife is very much a social butterfly and she preferred to connect with people face to face, compared to the online ad world. As we attended through those first months, the parties could be a serious party with or more couples, or occasionally they were a bust with only 5 couples, none of which appealed us.

Like any group that meets consistently, cliques did form, but at this point in our fun and frolic, we weren't limiting our playtime any specific group and were really wanting try as much variety as we could. After a couple sessions where we really didn't find anyone we were interested in, there came a night when Island Girl and her husband appeared.

Island Girl was from Jamaica and she came part and parcel with the expected accent. My wife, however, spotted the husband first - a tall, thin, and very attractive guy with an easy smile and soft voice. That he was black was certainly a bonus her since she'd never had sex with a black man, and she wanted- as part of her quest for variety. Seeing as that is a major theme the videos here on AdultFriendFinder, it isn't surprising she also wanted some of that action.

My wife made the introductions and we chatted awhile before she laid out our preference of swinging separately. The couple agreed readily and Island Girl and I were left on the living room couch as my wife and the husband slipped upstairs.

Island Girl was without a doubt the most exotic woman I'd ever connected with. Her hair had weaves and a few cornrows, her voice was an amazing island lilt and her body was overweight, but she owned it in a way that made her extremely sexy. I find confident BBW women quite attractive and this woman was full of confidence and desires that she eagerly imparted as we moved from kissing a bedroom undressing and beyond.

Island Girl was the first woman with whom I had sex over many different party dates. Unlike my wife, she wasn't particularly interested in variety. She liked repeat and hone her sexual experience with someone, and since we had the same sort-of relaxed style, we got know each other's desires very well. That she and her husband played separately was a good thing because he was a hot property amongst the women at the parties and he stayed pretty busy. Island Girl would seek me out when he went off on another bout of exploration. We fucked a lot. We talked a lot. She was the first true FWB I made during these heady days of exploration.

My wife and I had begun planning meet with them outside of the party environment when the husband's job took him to another city. He had a government job that pretty-regularly moved him around the country, so they were off to a new life.

But Island Girl had taught me that swinging sex was not always just wham-bam and on-to the next fuc You could really make connections with someone and have feelings for them that were more than raw sexual desire. I also began realize that all the propaganda I'd swallowed through the about how there was only one perfect match out there for everyone, and that you were only able love one person at a time was simply wrong, if you had the psychological makeup move outside such propaganda (not everyone does).

Around this time, I came across a book called "Everything you know about love and sex is wrong" by Pepper Schwartz. I found it interesting reading. While I didn't agree with everything she wrote, it helped me connect the dots between some of what I was feeling and the reality of the psychology behind it all. And it made me begin examine the possibility of polyamory, but acting on that would take a bit more time...
1 comment
Our second house party
Posted:May 18, 2021 4:48 pm
Last Updated:May 19, 2021 8:20 am

Continuing my own "My Secret Life" story

Having kicked-off our house-party experiences with such a bang-bang, our second house party would be a bit different. My wife went with the goal of meeting up again with the same guy as last time, but she wanted him for herself.

Now, most couples who start swinging have a long list of rules they plan to follow. This is a good idea so that no feelings get hurt in the sometimes mindless striving for sexual release. My wife and I had a few rules that we planned to stick-by during our first forays into swinging that included such things as "we always stick together" and "if one of us is uncomfortable, we both leave."

Like most couples who start with lots of rules, those rules often begin to fall away as the couple becomes more and more comfortable with sharing sexuality with others. I know it was my pleaser personality that said "yes" when my wife suggested that she could connect with a lover alone. After all, we'd be at the same party - what was the big deal? I acquiesced and the plan was for her to hook up alone.

As luck would have it, the same couple was there and to be honest, I'm not sure what happened so that she and her partner got together and headed off to the private room (with door closed) and I was left by myself. I would have been VERY happy to with the blonde firecracker again, but that was never suggested, and I found myself sitting in the hot tub by myself. That didn't last long.

Out of the house came a trio of women - all quite a bit older than we usually saw at these parties.. They all shucked their clothing and slipped into the hot tub with me. I will be the first to admit that I find older women attractive, and tend to prefer them to younger women, largely because they tend to have a better idea about what they want out of sex than younger women who are still seeking their focus.

We all chatted amicably a bit and I let them know my wife was inside having fun. One of the trio mentioned that they couldn't have me out here all alone like this and the trio, in one movement, slid through the water to me. I had a woman on either side of me, and one kissing me from the front. Suffice it to say, I considered myself a very lucky guy.

But just as I felt a couple of hands playing with my cock and balls, I heard someone approach the hot tub. The blonde firecracker was standing beside the hot tub crying, asking me to help her. While she had allowed her husband to go off with my wife, she was unprepared for the feelings that welled-up in her and she wanted to go back on the arrangement. She confessed that she didn't feel comfortable with my very thin and sexy wife playing with her husband and disparaged herself and her slight chubbiness.

Without a thought, I made my apologies to my trio of fantasy fulfillers and climbed from the hot tub to help out my former playmate. We went to the private room and knocked quietly on the door before letting ourselves in, interrupting the activities inside. We all chatted, with her apologizing profusely that she didn't realize she'd feel the way she did. Again, she disparaged her body shape in comparison to my wife's very thin physique and I hope that by the time we finished our talk, she felt better about herself. Being a young-dumb-full-of-cum guy, I would have happily proved to the blonde that I was more-than attracted to her, but that wasn't to-be as we parted ways. We never saw them at a party again.

However, it had established a swinging style for my wife and myself - we swapped, but we didn't play together. This rule would make things a bit more challenging for me since I was quite a bit more shy than she was. And frankly, she was smoking-hot, so picking up guys was exceedingly easy for her.

We didn't hook up with anyone else that night, but I still wish I could have seen things to the end with that trio of fantasy women in the hot tub.
First time full swap
Posted:May 18, 2021 2:48 pm
Last Updated:Jan 22, 2022 6:41 pm
Back in 2001 when my wife and I began our swinging experience, the scene was both more underground, and easier to get into. We generally hung out in one of two cities and in both of them there were a number of regular house parties that couples could get involved in. A quick internet search for "[city name] swinger party" would typically turn up a couple private house parties that had a web presence with a list of rules and the basic contact information so one could get registered. They were held at people's houses, not at a full time club, so they were much more intimate. In my most recent foray in to couples swinging, it seems these parties have gone completely underground, if they exist at all anymore.

But as it goes, we found a house party that was within a half hour of our home. We initially emailed to schedule an interview (required) and had soon gotten all the details to attend our first party. I really enjoyed getting-ready the night of a party which was always filled with the excitement of the possibility of having NSA sex later in the evening.

The party was held in an upscale neighborhood in a large 3 bedroom house. They had a formal dining room that was converted to a dance floor, a huge living room with multiple couches where debauchery could occur, and as noted, 3 bedrooms...a large master suite downstairs and 2 smaller rooms upstairs. We found out that the rules of the house required that 2 of the rooms always have their door open and one was an optional "private" room - if the door was closed, you were supposed to respect that and stay out. There was also a game room with a pool table and a huge hot tub in the backyard.

That first night, there were about couples, as I recall. My wife, being the pickier of us two, pretty much identified the couple she wanted to play with early-on. They were a couple our own age with an attractive husband who was a bit quiet and a wife who was a cute blonde, just a little overweight (something I've always preferred), but extremely bubbly and the life of the party. My wife has never been shy - and she sidled up to the husband and proposed we get together and they answered they'd spotted us early-on too...so they were on-board!

We grabbed the hand of each other's partner and excitedly slipped into the closest empty room. As it turned out, this was their first time doing this, too, so we all giggled about what we should do next. That didn't last long as my new partner threw her arms around my neck and we began kissing. From that moment-on, I barely looked over at my wife as I became completely focused on my new partner and how she felt, smelled and tasted. Remember, this was the first time I'd had sex with someone other than my wife. The sheer power of the excitement was beyond description as our clothes disappeared and I found us in a sideways 69, my face between her legs licking her smooth pussy as she played a fine tune on my pulsing cock (my wife didn't really like oral, so it became a treat for me thanks to swinging).

I was very lucky that this spicy partner of mine was such a perfect "first time" in every way. She knew what she wanted and she moved to get it, often making the first move, so we were never in an awkward spot during our fun. It was also clear was enjoying the experience as much as I was and that heightened my arousal since I am a pleaser who gets turned-on most when my partner is turned-on. We soon dug out the obligatory condom and fucked every which way we could imagine as we cast aside the rut of married sex. I think I looked over to where my wife and her partner were only once, on a couch on the other side of the room, and I saw her being fucked gently by her temporary lover, looking quite pleased with the experience.

Where my wife and her partner were slow, gentle and quiet, my firecracker of a partner was vocal, always moving, and demanding of what she wanted, and I gave her everything she asked until I could hold back no longer and came heavily, The afterglow of sex is always an interesting time in swinging since there is not the expectation of further congress between the partners. It can be very abrupt with some couples, but in this case, it was lingering, very sweet and filled with gentle touches and kisses. I finally let my attention drift across the room where my wife and her partner were still fucking, but with more abandon than before. She was on her hands and knees over the arm of the couch and he had one foot on the floor and a knee on the couch cushions as he filled her from behind.

I had always imagined I'd love watching another man fuck my wife, and here was the moment when I would find out if, in reality, that belief held true. Later-on in my experience, there were times when what I expected to feel was quite off the mark to what I ended up feeling. But in this case, seeing her take his hard cock and watching her body respond with such pleasure, I was massively turned-on by this vision before me. Sharing was definitely caring, as far as I was concerned, and I wanted to share her as much as I could...and if I was lucky enough to gain an NSA partner like my blonde firecracker, all the better.

Not everyone has a great first swinging experience, but we were one of the lucky couples. Our first party ended in an amazing time with truly sexy partners. Later in the evening, we sat naked in the hot tub with the host and hostess and talked about the experience. We casually stroked each other's bodies - but nothing more happened. It was a nice finish to an evening that would define our sexual behavior for the next 20 years.
Making the rounds
Posted:May 17, 2021 6:13 pm
Last Updated:May 18, 2021 4:50 pm
One thing we discovered is that by going swinger clubs, it caused my wife and I get our hormones so carbonated that we needed fuck someone blow off the sexual tension that we'd built up all night long. Since we were starting off very discerning and honestly, kinda picky, we ended up having only ourselves for satiating our desires. On occasions, she couldn't wait deal with the pent-up sexual energy we'd generated and we engaged in some rather risky behavior. But, as she told me later, that was just the point to make it that much more exciting.

The first time came after an evening at a small club we visited. We didn't find anyone particularly exciting, but the general energy of the people managed to get us feeling pretty frisky by the time we left to head home. This club was on the outskirts of town and as we drove back into town at 1am down a -lane road, my wife ordered park on the side of the road in the driveway of a cement company. I had just turned off the ignition when she ordered me out of the van and she met me on the side away from the road. Once there, she pulled up her skirt, slid her panties the ground, faced the van and leaned her hands against the side, waving her now bare ass at and shouted at , "FUCK !"

There wasn't a moment waste and I slipped my slacks down, freed my instantly hard cock and slid it easily into her pussy, already wet from the night's unrequited sexual tension The lights from the cement plant illuminated us completely so we could be easily spotted by anyone driving around a curve to our right. It didn't take me long to cum with the sheer excitement of having sex on the roadside, a mere van's width away from the road.

I pulled out of her and she slipped her panties back up her legs as I slipped back into my slacks. We clambered back into the van and drove home laughing. Nobody had driven by, but that was because it was well after 1am on a rural road. Still, we'd defied decorum for a bit of public sex and that was all that mattered. We later would wonder if there had been any video cameras monitoring the driveway where some lucky security guard got to "monitor" our fun.

Another time, we were coming home from one of the inner-city clubs where we'd ground and groped all night with a few couples. My wife directed me to exit the highway and directed me to the parking lot of Sam's Wholesale, and then to a distant corner of the lot. It was again well past 1am and as we got out of the car, I wondered what she had in mind as she headed into the woods next to the parking lot. It turned out that there was a small path that led to a wooden pathway over a wetland with some science-filled placards describing the area. We were completely out of sight from the world, but still in earshot of the busy highway.

As before, she pulled down her panties then leaned over the deck's railing, offering her own wetland to me as frogs sang to us from theirs. We were able to fuck with a little less urgency, but she whispered, "Do you think Sam's has a security guard who may come out here to find out why we're parked here?" and that increased the sense of being found-out. She loved the risk of it all - it pushed the experience to heights she could never get in our bedroom and I loved fucking my wife again. The risk pushed me over the edge quickly and we sauntered back into the parking lot and drove away...a bit disappointed not to see a security guard coming to figure out what was going on.

We played at a few more clubs before we eventually discovered a regular house party where we'd become a long-standing member and attendee, and where we'd earn our full-fledged swinger's wings many times over.

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Most Recent Comments by Others

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More than just friends (2)neotrio
Jun 24, 2021 2:05 am
Cum one, Cum all! (1)author51
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May 26, 2021 6:42 am
Mary Tyler Moore-ish (2)author51
May 19, 2021 11:24 pm
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Our second house party (4)author51
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