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We're Not In Kansas Anymore!
Posted:Oct 24, 2010 8:41 pm
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2012 2:26 pm
Wow! We're definitely not in Kansas anymore Toto! I came back for a visit, and everything has changed! I'm not even sure I know how to blog here anymore. Anyways......how are you all? What are you all doing? And WHO all remains here in blogland? Miss you guys!
Who Are We Anyways?
Posted:Dec 1, 2007 7:15 pm
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2012 2:13 pm
In my mind, I am tall....at least taller than I am now. My hair is still long, and blows romantically in the wind.

The prince I've always waited for rides in and swoops me up onto his huge white , and my hair and gown flows behind us as we ride into the wind.

He turns my face to his and kisses me tenderly and lets me know that I am the only woman in the whole world for him. He will always love me and take care of me.

The orchestra begins to play a romantic song......

"It seems we've stood and talked like this before,
We looked at each other in the same way then.
But I can't remember where, or when.

The clothes you're wearing are the clothes you wore,
The smile you are smiling you were smiling then.
But I can't remember where or when."

The orchestra music rises to a feverish pitch, and we sway together almost as one.........

What a crock of shit!

In truth.....I am short. My hair is short, cute and flirty....but I color it to cover the gray. The man I love is completely enamoured alright......with a girl younger than our daughters. And he never really liked to dance at all......so I gave up the love of dancing many many years ago. I probably don't even remember how to dance anymore.

So....is that why we are all here on this website?

Because we can be what we really want to be here? We don't have to put on that happy face if we don't want to?

Tell me......who are you.......really?
Just wondering
Posted:Nov 18, 2007 10:38 am
Last Updated:Oct 24, 2010 8:41 pm
So, enough of the sad crap. First of all, let me tell you all that truthfully, I have not been this happy in a long time.

I am married to a man......who is actually a very smart, wonderful person. But we got married very young. And our journey together has been a long, and often bumpy one. Of course all of you realize that it takes two to tango....so the blame belongs to me as well. Some of you who have been on here a long time know my husband....and have walked with us on part of this journey.

But I have chosen to be happy. And I have chosen to respect myself. And I have given him a choice to either respect me as well, or move on towards his next journey without me. As it stands right now.....he "says" he chooses me.
But we will see.

So.....what I'd really like to know is.......What the heck have you all been up to????

Give me the rest of the story baby.
Just Writing For Me
Posted:Nov 16, 2007 9:14 am
Last Updated:Oct 24, 2010 8:46 pm

I haven't been here in a long time. I pop in now and then to read some of your writings. I'm so tempted to be here all the time. But, life must go on.

In so many ways, you all have the right idea. Maybe this is the wrong place in some people's eyes. But this is one of the most loving and accepting places on the face of the earth. Where else can you write whatever is in your heart and just be accepted for who you are.

Today I am thinking alot about respect.

And the fact that I have NO respect from my husband.

Now, he would tell you that he respects me. That he loves me, that he wants me. But all of his actions say otherwise.

He has chose a VERY young girl who weighs all of about 90 pounds. A single mom with a baby. Someone he has NEVER met, has NEVER spoken to....but has only chatted with online. And he has chose her over me.

Now, he wants to stay married. He says he loves me. But he is also continually very drawn towards this young girl.

You know how I feel? I feel totally disrepected! And if I don't do something about it immediately, I'm going to lose my own self respect!

So, I think I will give him an early Christmas present.........HIS FREEDOM!
To All In Blogland
Posted:Aug 8, 2007 9:17 pm
Last Updated:Oct 30, 2010 5:09 pm
I do feel a little like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz........I'd like to click my ruby slippers together and say "there's no place like home".

I'm not sure why I have decided to leave a message here tonight. I guess I just wanted all of you to know that I do think of you often. And I slip back in now and then to read your blogs.

And I guess as well that I miss the blogging. I know that this is not exactly a place that I'd want everyone in my everyday life to know that I frequented......but in real life I'd be proud to introduce any one of you as my friend. And blogging is honestly cheap therapy, isn't it?

Well, just know that I care about you. That I still think of you. And just like Dorothy.....there's no place like home!
A Blogland Birthday Present!
Posted:Jan 18, 2007 10:31 pm
Last Updated:Dec 29, 2010 8:15 pm
It's been a very long time since I have even "peeked" at this website! But not a day goes by that I don't think of all of you.

You see, I have been on quite a journey.......and it became very apparent to me that I was using AdultFriendFinder, and in particular, the blogs as an escape! This is a place that I knew I could come to and find love and acceptance. A place where I could write whatever I wanted, and you all could choose to either read it or pass it by! I needed to leave for a time and deal with finding that peace in my life.

But today.....the 19th of January.....is my birthday! So, I decided that my birthday present to myself would be to come back here to this place I have loved, and visit all of you who became such a huge part of my life. I have spent the last several hours visiting all of the blogs on my watched blog list, and just saying hi to all of you!

THANK YOU BLOGLAND!!!! For being one of the best presents ever!

And please know that I love and miss you all! 143
Calling All Butterflies!
Posted:Nov 12, 2006 7:34 pm
Last Updated:Jan 18, 2007 10:49 pm
When my were little, and life was often hectic and hard.......I often thought that things would be easier when they were grown and we could be friends.

Little did I know that a mother's heart work is never done. We never stop worrying about them. Wishing we could help them glide through life just a little easier. Hoping and praying that the bumpy roads they all must face as adults will be just cushioned enough that they can glide over them somehow.

But the pain we all feel as mothers never stops. Watching them go through what they must is painful......and joyful.....and painful.

One of our own ShayeDK ShayeDK is facing something that as parent's we all hope we will never have to face. The death of a .
Her post today [post 587684] is short and painful to read. But I'm asking you to read it.

Then....do what Blogland does so well. Show your support for her. Fly the butterflies on your blog......and share just a tiny bit of her pain. Thank you my friends.....for being here...and for caring.
Posted:Nov 11, 2006 8:29 am
Last Updated:Feb 24, 2011 8:06 pm
Oh yeah, Baby!!!!

Make Me...............
Posted:Nov 9, 2006 10:24 am
Last Updated:Aug 8, 2007 9:19 pm
This is what I need!

Make my head fall back
My mouth fall open
Let my ears hear sounds
And my mind wonder who is making them

Make my body arch
And the world stop
Even for a moment

This is what I need!

Posted:Nov 8, 2006 3:33 am
Last Updated:Nov 11, 2006 8:30 am
There were three girls in my family. And my mom's sister had two boys. I was the oldest, and it went boy/girl, boy/girl after that. My parents and my aunt and uncle used to play cards on the weekends....and my sisters and I would come along to play with our cousins.

And play we did. Sometimes we'd get a little ornery and play "doctor". We should have known better than to get too quiet....because soon we'd hear booming footsteps (my uncle was big) and the door would burst open while my uncle yelled "What's going on in here?"

We'd always undress the youngest two....and this time, we tried to shove them down between the bed and the wall so my uncle couldn't see that their pants were off. He told us to "behave ourselves" and went back to playing cards. We could hear the laughter out in the other room.

I realize now that he probably knew exactly what we were doing.....but also knew that it was just innocent childhood stuff! I also realized after I was grown up that he was slightly perverted too!

So, my sister blames me for her own perversions.....due to being the "patient" for our doctor adventures.

And my cousin....who I taught to kiss....blames me because no one has ever kissed him quite like me before or since.

So....who do you think I should blame?

Who do you blame for your personality woes?

Or your sexuality?

Or your perversions?

Who here in blogland would YOU like to play doctor with???

Everything Came Out Fine
Posted:Nov 7, 2006 6:17 am
Last Updated:Nov 9, 2006 10:10 am
Well, the prep was rough! I thought that my intestines would be on the outside before the actual procedure would be done.

But the colonoscopy was not too bad. They had a rough time starting the IV....but that's nothing new for me. I had to remind them about a hundred times that I was allergic to latex. And even then the second nurse that tried to get an IV going put a latex tourniquet around my arm....and made me get hives.

They did find one polyp and removed it. So, now we wait for the biopsy. I feel like it will be fine though. I don't feel any sense of dread. Anybody else get those feelings?

The medication they gave me has kept me asleep almost the rest of the day and night. And even though it's 9am now, I feel like I could go back to sleep again.

Thanks you guys! For cheering me up and keeping me in your thoughts and prayers! I was thinking about butterflies as I fell asleep yesterday!

I'll write more when I can wake up fully!
Posted:Nov 5, 2006 8:14 am
Last Updated:Nov 7, 2006 6:10 am
Ok! I'll admit it....I'm a big weenie!

But didn't you know that nurses make the worst patients ever???????

Tomorrow, I have to have a procedure done. And they have to sedate me to do it....and you all know how much I HATE sedation. I just don't do it well. But, I'm an obedient girl....and the oncologist says its time to do this. I am just completely dreading it.

But, my good friend, unlistedone [blog unlistedone], reminded me that we're not getting older, we're getting better. He has a great blog post today....hop over there and read it!

So, today I can't eat.....I have to drink lots of clear liquids though. And don't you know....most days, I'm not a breakfast eater. But just tell someone they can't eat....and guess what? They want to eat! And then I have to drink this horrible stuff.....that's going to completely clean me out!

Have you guessed it? I'm having a colonoscopy!

Pray for me tomorrow at 11am, will ya? I'm terrified of sedation....even though the last one went well. And to add insult to injury....when I went to my pre-procedure appointment.....THREE of my former students work at this office! So......just let me stick my ass in the air.....and hide my head! lol
Posted:Nov 3, 2006 5:38 am
Last Updated:Nov 5, 2006 3:41 pm
I've been thinking alot about masturbation these days. Well......to be truthful, I've been DOING alot of masturbation these days!

One of the interesting things to me recently is that my fantasies have changed while masturbating! I think that is absolutely part of my own spiritual awakening. But it is still interesting.

But here's my problem.....I'm bored with masturbation. It seems to take longer to orgasm....and it's just not as much fun.

Maybe I need a new toy. Or a mindblowing orgasm. Or a new fantasy. Or a lover!


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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
Ahhhhhhh! (48)dess36
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