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Your 1x1 Picture
Posted:Mar 23, 2020 6:46 am
Last Updated:Apr 4, 2020 7:05 pm

Dear Mr.  1x1 Computer Naked Picture Man FF-x,

We are in these dark days of sheltering in place.   I'm stuck at my desk surrounded by several monitors day after day.  (Queue the violins)   My thoughts wander and I find myself logging in to get a glimpse of you.   Just a little peek or maybe a big peek.

You haunt my thoughts.   Everywhere I look you have bombarded with images of your overwhelming package.  Left, Right, , Down, Next Page, Video's, IT is litrally ALL I SEE.  Sometimes I even see more than I really want see.    It seems if I had several monitors in front of (which I do) I would be surrounded and you might seem like you are in 3D.   (Or is that my multi-focal lenses playing tricks ?)

I want say I can almost reach out and touch you but let's be real here, Social distancing has come between us.    Gasp!   We've been forced back to the age where we can only write dirty explicit things to each other or think of them.   I really want to describe in vivid detail what my mouth can do to every part of you I see in your picture.  You've become my virtual centerfold.   (Queue: J. Geils Band - Angel is a Centerfold).   

I just wanted you to know how much pleaxure, delight, excitement, passion, and sexual gratification you've given me.    Many Thanks.   (Yes I wash my hands with soap each and every time so thanks for asking and caring)

Fondly Salivating over here,
Your standard member who can't IM with you.
Top Ten No-No's When Meeting
Posted:Mar 20, 2020 7:22 pm
Last Updated:May 22, 2020 2:28 pm

1. Put some effort into wearing something presentable. That old t-shirt with the rip, stain or faded grateful dead graphic is going to come across poorly. (Unless you know we share something common in music) . Grow up and wear some big boy clothes. Try to make it a shirt without wrinkles. Wrinkles make a girl think of ironing and nothing turns us off more than ironing.

2. Ummm... did you have Italian for lunch? Indian? Or was that a black coffee? Breath mints, mint gum, mint candy ... you get the hint.

3. If you are missing some teeth it would be nice to know beforehand. Skip the tobacco chew. (What were you even thinking?)

4. Body Odor. OMG. Need I say anything more. It's a BIG no-no. Take a shower that morning, put on some nice cologne and try not to do a workout without a shower before you meet. Pretty please. I promise I'll smell just like your favorite rice crispy treat.

5. Stop staring at my boobs. Honestly, I have a face - really. I know they are large and deserve delicious attention (and I might have named them) but uhmmm.... this is a first time meet. I'm going to get the creepy vibe from you. Like stalker creep vibe - yuck. Then I'm going to start thinking you watch too much porn.

6. Do NOT do NOT pull out your phone. Don't answer a call, don't text and don't even look at it. If you can't spend 20 minutes at a first time meet without touching your phone or taking a little peek - how much attention are you going to give anything else. I mean ... really. If I can teach my grown to do it - I'm sure you can do it too.

7. Do NOT stare at some other girl who passes the table and look her up and down when you are engaging in a conversation with me. Didn't your mom raise you right? If you want her - then just tell me. I'm sure she has three shoeboxes of sex toys like I do. Yeah right. Just remember karma is a bitch.

8. A first time meet is not where you want to hear about surprises. If you didn't mention you were married 4 other times . - this isn't going to go over well. Or the 12 . Or the 10 cats/dogs/chickens/etc. If you didn't mention you were still married - or were only interested in a hookup - prior to a first time meet - Yes Houston We Have a Problem. Honesty prior to a meet is always the best policy.

9. If you look nothing like your picture - all bets are off. The five minute policy is still in effect and a polite - thanks but no thanks is perfectly ok. Don't get mad and go ballistic when I say no thanks. If you look better than your picture - I'll likely be drooling and slightly incoherent because my brain is stunned. It works both ways.

10. Sex at a first time meet? You might want to ask first. If I slap you - then you'll get the message. Don't try to reach my tonsils and don't go all grabby on me (unless of course I'm giving the signals for full steam ahead and I'm grabbing you and people are staring or clapping or all of the above).

Hopefully I didn't miss anything and hopefully I didn't offend anyone. Remember this is all part of the fun.
1 comment
The top Corona Virus song on AdultFriendFinder ....
Posted:Mar 16, 2020 6:28 am
Last Updated:Mar 22, 2020 7:33 pm

Ok as the cases get worse, the grocery lines get longer and we must social distance to the little marks on the grocery floor - let's find another song for the week:

Down with the Sickness - Richard Cheese

In these dark days of self imposed quarantining and social distancing and shortages of soft TP, cleaning products, thermometers, and food ...

My top tune for the next few weeks:

Divinyls - I Touch Myself

Besides REM - It's the End of the World

Anyone else? Perhaps a sense of humor here?

Virtual hugs
1 comment
Ms. Curvaceous
Posted:Feb 5, 2020 12:31 pm
Last Updated:Jul 6, 2020 6:48 pm

I wish.

This one goes out to all the guys who want to write to their own Ms. Curvaceous. To truly get it - read Dear Mr Yum 2 first. Afterall, there are always two points of view.

I am simple amazed I did not have a heart attack after watching you at the gas station the other day. I hope this letter finds you well and maybe just FINDS you. This is feeling like a missed connection but in my heart I know you are reading it. Fingers crossed.

When I saw you - you simply took my breath away. I'm not sure what it was but perhaps the fluttering of your eyes though I don't really understand all that blinking that was going on but hell you had me at the first flutter. Were you winking at me? Heck, I had to rub my eye for a second watching you and then that gust of wind came by and I was trying not to be blinded by the dirt being blown all around me so I must have looked kinda strange looking like my eyeballs were falling out. I must say - Wow - that gust of wind where your hair went in every direction (and oh my - you have ALOT of hair) and it seemed like you were just staring straight at me. My personal porn star photo shoot complete with a fan blowing. How you managed to deal with all that hair in your face and mouth (were you chewing on your hair? I couldn't quite tell) was just astonishing. I thought maybe you were thinking something else should be in your mouth or maybe sucking on my fingers or something else. Really, I was a step away from a heart attack and dropping like a fly. Would you have run over to give me mouth to mouth? I seriously hope so. Maybe you could have bent over so I could see that deep cleavage and take a peek? The thought of you bent over. OMG. I know, I know - but I'm already having a heart attack so what's the real harm here? One or two - it's all the same. Tell me please you wear a demi-bra and your nipples just barely peek through. Please. Please. Dying men have to know these things. If I'm going out of this world - I want to make sure I go out with a great visual. Can you blame me? I'm a guy after-all.

Honestly Ms. Curvaceous I didn't think it could get any hotter until you pulled that nozzle from that gas pump and then tried (I will repeat this slowly, you tried) repeatedly to get the pump into the hole. I almost decided to go over to help you but you seemed so intent on studying the fit of the pump to the hole - I was mesmerized or is it spellbound? I never knew anyone studied these things and did it so intently. Were you doing a research report? You blew me away Ms. Curvaceous, well I secretly wish you would blow me) but really I am completely astonished. I'm pretty sure we can work on your technique together Ms. Curvaceous. I have a pump just waiting to fill your many holes. I can show you the quickie fit, the long and strong fit and not to forget the if you don't succeed try and try again fit. They ALL do the job. Maybe you'd do me the honor to study my pump up, close and oh so very personal. I wouldn't even rush you because I'm a really nice guy like that. Trust me when I tell you it is ready to serve! We can even experiment a bit so you can feel comfortable the next time you are at a gas station. Think about it.

Oh and Ms. Curvaceous was that you I saw at the coffee shop the other day? You were behind me weren't you? I was in line with my younger co-worker. She's a hottie isn't she Ms. Curvaceous? We were having a great conversation and she thought you were cute. She's really into women and she's the one who told me to secretly look behind me. I didn't realize you were staring at us. Maybe you were remembering me from the gas station? Or were you daydreaming and just staring off into space? I was starting to seriously sweat under my collar and for a second thought maybe some crazy stalker chick was following me. I wasn't sure if you wanted to lap me up like a vanilla latte or just slug me or you were zoned out. My brain was getting weird signals but it didn't matter because you were arousing me like crazy. My co-worker said she would do you a few times. She's kinda into all that kinky stuff. Ms. Curvaceous, how do you feel about that? Can I tie you up and have my way with you? I was thinking about a million sex toys I would use on you and then use again. We can see how long it takes to wear out the batteries. Crazy but I was thinking you looked like you might enjoy several sex toys at once. Am I right Ms. Curvaceous? Maybe I'll need to start a shoebox or two of these things. I was having such incredibly erotic thoughts that when my co-worker whispered in my ear we had to leave due to a meeting - I was kinda disappointed we didn't get to talk. She had to pull me away from that line just to get me to move. Ms. Curvaceous, I don't even know what kind of coffee you like? Please don't tell me you drink tea. Please. I'm not sure how I can go into that coffee shop again Ms. Curvaceous. I'm pretty sure I'm going to have a boner every time I think about you, vanilla lattes and sex toys for a long time.

It's almost Valentines Day Ms. Curvaceous. I was thinking about you and our missed connections. Oh - Not in a stalker guy kind of way but more like - she just does it for me so where is she kind of way. I can only hope you think of me the same way. Trust me - an evening doesn't go by that I don't think of you and what your mouth could do to me. You are the porn star in all my fantasies, the woman of my dreams and my sexual fantasy partner. Ms. Curvaceous, we could write a book of our many sexual explorations together or maybe just blog about our stories. Would you blog about me Ms Curvaceous? Do you dream about me and wake up wet and aroused? Ms. Curvaceous I hope you don't mind if I'm not sending you a box of chocolates - I want you to know that I think some strategically placed chocolate pieces in a line down my body (I was thinking you might need instructions considering how you were with pumping gas) is really all you need to satisfy all your desires. I'll even make it an arrow. Everyone knows what an arrow is right? Forget the box, save the calories and just think of devouring me instead.

Yours Truly,
Mr. Yum
1 comment
Inquiring minds
Posted:Dec 26, 2019 8:26 pm
Last Updated:Jul 6, 2020 6:49 pm

Seriously I write a story, I double check it, I triple check it - then I upload it and magically words go missing. Then I edit it and have to fix all the quotes and then fix all the missing words. I upload it and words disappear again.

Inquiring minds want to know why the word seems be filtered of blog posts strategically. It's worse than thinking it is smarter than I am.

One would start think I have no idea how form a sentence. I apologize everyone for having figure the missing words.

Ms. Curvaceous

First Edit: The word H followed by the letter O followed by the letter T is missing. It used to be there. The word M followed by Y used to be before . And the case of the word T followed by O was before figure. This is kinda funny. How can the word that is opposite of cold - be forbidden? Maybe I'm in an alternate universe.
1 comment
Mr. Yum (3), Yummy, Yummylicious
Posted:Dec 26, 2019 5:37 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2019 12:43 pm

I think I'll trying editing this Mr. Yum.

Dear Mr. Yum, Yummy, Yumly, Yummylicious,

Gosh darn it Mr. Yum, was that you again I saw? It's the holiday time Mr. Yum. You know ... like humming Chestnuts roasting on an open fire and some lady named Jackie nipping at your ... well I don't know all the words Mr. Yum but I'm sure that lady Jackie knew what she was nipping at or sipping at or just whatever she was doing. It if it was Jack Frost - he can nip at whatever he wants too! The world needs more women like Jackie or Jack nipping at something.

Mr. Yum, did you get all your favorite Christmas presents? Was Santa good to you this year? Pssst... I have tell you a secret Mr. Yum. Santa left this brown paper box filled with some very sexy toys, Mr. Yum. I don't even know how he knew where to leave it (well ok I'll admit I did kinda give him a few hints placing a few online orders like 5 or 6 or maybe 7 but I knew he was monitoring my internet connection to see if I was good or bad - Santa is good like that - he knows what you are thinking so be good for goodness sake - oh something like that). Mr. Yum, every time I opened up one of those brown paper package delights - I squealed in joy with OMG!!! I LOVE IT!!! and then I particularly thought about you with your eyes crossed as you watched me play with all of my toys.

Mr. Yum, you don't mind if I call you Mr. Yummy do you? I kinda like thinking of you as my favorite Christmas cookie that I can never get enough of. So Mr. Yummy, did you ask Santa for a favorite toy too? No, Mr. Yummy - not a Star Wars action figure or a box of Lego's (though I do love Lego's too but that's a different kinda story) but ya know...... Psssst ..... like an adult toy. Like a whip, chain, pair of nylons, I don't know maybe some probe device so you can search for aliens that might be hiding in my body. Ok, ok Mr. Yummy, you know what I mean, don't make me get my panties tied in a twist. There could be aliens. Maybe we can that old game - what was it called - oh Operation. You can use your probbing wand and see if you can make me create some noises. I promise you Mr. Yummy - my nose won't light up but maybe you can find some of my other red light up spots.

So Mr. Yummy, any scorching exciting new year plans? Are we meeting at our secret spot .... you know .... the spot sooooo secret we both don't know where it is so we never ever meet and I keep writing you these corny messages that you love? I hope you don't have a date Mr. Yummy. You know there is nobody hotter for you than I am. I'm practically combustible. Trust me, Mr. Yummy, Yumster, Yummylicious - you won't be able to walk, move or run after we meet - I'll apologize afterward for tying you up. No no Mr. Yum - it'll be hot - I promise. You'll love it. I'll tie myself up too and we can just stare at each other all night if that makes you feel better so you don't think I'm that stalker chick kinda girl again. Ok forget the ties, who am I kidding. I think you are perfect the way you are Mr. Yum. Oh and Mr. Yum - I bet she's a lousy new years eve kisser and probably doesn't know what to do with her tongue but I'm not jealous. I'm just kinda stating the obvious for you Mr Yum. She probably has bird lips too (is that a thing?)

Uhmmm ...Mr. Yum - I think this upcoming year is going be Our year. Just us, Mr. Yum.

So be prepared Mr. Yum (Were you a boyscout Mr. Yum?) - and make sure you order the industrial supply of condoms from amazon - ok? Very very important - boxes everywhere and I do mean everywhere including underthe bed too and don't forget the kitchen table. I'm giving you the best advice I can because this year is going to be a heck of a great year and Mr. Yum - don't forget - you are in the starring role.

Ms. Curvaceous
Santa Baby ..
Posted:Dec 25, 2019 4:38 am
Last Updated:Dec 25, 2019 5:47 am

Sometimes - you take a previous story and you give it new life..... Happy Holidays to my readers. You know who you are. May Santa have delivered to you - a sexy present.

Waiting patiently was never one her strong traits and damn him - he was late. Her thoughts a jumble of erotic images and her body already tense with anticipation. The wait was excruciating but she knew it only enhanced her arousal.  She felt like a at a candy store and wondered if she would just jump him when he arrived.  He was late.  Perhaps the nasty Austin traffic - shouldn't people stop moving here at some point?  She couldn't wait to see him. She settled herself on the bed, laying on her stomach and pulling out a pen and pad to start another erotic piece of literature.  Humming a Christmas song - Santa baby, slip a condom under the tree for me,  been an awful good girl, Santa baby, so hurry down my chimney tonight....  Images of him danced in her head like visions of sugar plums. He was making her mouth water.   Hmmm maybe this is how Santa feels when he sees a plate of cookies?

She heard the rattle of the doorknob and looked over. He walked in, closed the door and then he just enjoyed the little stage setting for a minute. It was chilly outside, the weather colder because of the holiday season and the so-called Austin winter.  Is it really ever Winter in Austin - sure a bit chilly and enough to want to warm your body against just about any warmer body but not truly really truly cold.  Traffic was impossible with a car accident that caused miles of backed vehicles, he's not sure how he escaped that madness.  Thank goodness years of living in the area means he knew every side street and exit to get around the chaos.

She was dressed in her holiday attire. Red silky pajamas, red painted toenails and a small red bow tied around her neck. Just like his own personal holiday gift ready to be unwrapped. Her legs were crossed up in the air as she was penning some thoughts and she was humming some freaking Christmas tune. She looked over and smiled. She said - I was warming up the bed for you ... come over and join me. How did she do that to him - a simple sentence and already he was getting hard. He removed his sweatshirt and walked to the bed sitting down next to her with a huge smile on his face.  How could you not have a smile - A big red bow just for him.  He placed his hand on her back and leaned over nuzzling her neck. Mmmmm... you're nice and warm. She laughed and discarded her pen and pad without a thought, flinging it without a care in the world. She turned around, wound her hands around his neck and pulled him down for the kiss. She savored the feel of his lips, tongue and the heat melting in his embrace. Her tongue played an ancient mating game with his and her mouth seduced him like only she could.  While she nuzzled at his neck enjoying the slight stubble and peppering him with kisses she whispered Happy Holidays. He laughed, thinking to himself Happy ... hell ya. As she licked him from jaw to ear... she whispered - I hope you enjoy unwrapping your present.  They say unwrapping very slowly adds to the excitement.

He reached down to unbutton the front of the silky pajamas. To his delight
he discovered more gift wrap as she wore a bright red holiday pushup bra
underneath. Whew.  How do they make these things that barely fit?  Really does Santa have special Elves set aside to figure out sizing and the fact her breasts were barely contained?   He slid it off her shoulders and dipped his head to nuzzle his way down her neck to her cleavage. She tasted like his favorite holiday sugar cookie maybe a combination of vanilla and almond with a hint of sugar cookie frosting.  Absolutely fucking Delicious. He placed his hand on her hips and slowly peeled off the silky pajama bottoms revealing her red holiday V panties. He sighed in appreciation just staring at the miraculous sight in front of him.  What man (and would likely tempt any woman) in his right mind could ignore these scraps of nothing really with the power to bring a man to his knees so he could use his mouth to pull the lovely little bow strings holding the pieces of fabric together.  He didn't think he'd ever get tired of the sight. Thank you Santa (and your Elves) for women's lingerie.

She was so restless - You're making me hot ... here let's get you out of these useless clothes. She slowly removes his clothes tossing them just about in every direction as her hands are teasing him with sinful torture... so delicate ... so delicious.. he groans.  She's going to be his undoing.   Then he then slides his hands over her breasts as it's all fair play and slides the cups aside and stimulates her hard pebbly nipples as she gasps in delight squirming closer for more. He could swear he still hears her humming that damn Christmas tune again.    

She just wants to devour him and that impressive candy cane package that she just can't get enough of.  She feels herself getting wet as he reaches behind her unhooking her bra clasp and discarding it. Then leaning in he starts sucking on her breasts with his mouth, tonguing her nipple and slowly sucking it in.  He hears her whimpers of delight and feels her restless movements and it's turning him on that he has the power to bring her to her knees. He lightly bites down on her nipples knowing how much stimulation she enjoys as she reacts with trying to climb him like garland on a Christmas tree. Then he reaches down and slowly undoes the ties on her pretty little panties to have them slip to the floor like soft little flower petals.  His personal holiday gift fully unwrapped and ready for his plunder.  He was never very gentle with his toys during the holiday season.  Smirking while remembering his naughtiness he slides his finger over her soft vaginal folds and slowly inside her feeling her warm wetness and juices as he continues slowly fucking her with his finger.  She's pushing against his finger and whispering More as he adds in another finger and uses his two fingers to stroke her g-spot over and over again.  Slowly he slides up to stimulate her clitoris until and she is pushing and bucking up against his finger. He smiles.. knowing she is as aroused as he with an impending orgasm on the way.   Who needs holiday goodies when he has his own personal supply.

She leans in and says,  wait, wait ..... She reaches over and grabs the bottle of scented oil this one saying Buttercream Frosting. She's smiling and thinking to herself, time for some fun knowing he will enjoy every second of it. She tips a stream of oil onto her hands and slowly warms and massages the oil so her hands are covered. She looks up at him and says - Have you been naughty or nice this year?  Then she slowly begins to rub in the oil.  Starting on his cock she works the oil onto his erection with long, tight pulls that draw his shaft up and out. He practically shivers in delight wanting more but waiting patiently. She uses her hands to cup his balls, his scrotum is full, warm and already pulled up with excitement. She can feel herself getting warmer and wetter just from the anticipation and his reaction. Satisfied he is ready, she removes her vibrator from the table and starts rubbing the oil over its head and body. This is going to be so delicious and so naughty.  Then while staring at him she takes the vibrator and slowly starts inserting it into her pussy, spreading herself so she can get the full length fully inserted.   It's taking her a moment to adjust since it isn't exactly the smallest vibrator she has and it's lodged pretty deep inside.  They really do need to make candy canes much bigger to practice with and maybe she'll send a letter to Santa next year.   Like he's just been mesmerized - he slowly realizes this is not how he wanted this to play out.   So he grabs her, turns her around before she can recover and tips her over so her ass is in front of him in carnal invitation.  He grabs the scented oil bottle and tips a stream over her tailbone and using his fingers he works it in and down slowly, massaging it into her anus. Around and around he rubs the oil into her till his finger is buried knuckle deep inside. She is squirming, moaning and is that a prayer to Santa he hears? He knows she needs to be well lubricated, the fit is going to be very intense especially with the vibrator fully lodged in her pussy. Knowing she is ready he slides his cock over her well oiled backside letting her feel and enjoy the slick surface. She feels his erection sliding down between her cheeks and she is tingling all over from the sensuous sensations.  Why is that damn song still stuck in my head - hurry down the chimney tonight.  Geez.    Then she feels him pushing the head through her tightened rim and slowly pushing so she can savor the full penetration. She panting and groaning and reaches over to turn on the vibrator on low and Gasps.  OMG.  Tight, warm, slippery, vibrating, steamy, slick penetration in both her pussy and her ass has her gripping the bed so hard she's sure - There really is a Santa Claus and maybe some special Angels.   He starts thrusting back in as she arches her back allowing him to slide in so deep he is completely held. He thinks -he might just lose his mind and takes a minute to catch his breath. So good, so slippery and so extremely tight.  He's murmuring something as he is pulling out and sinking back in again. She is beyond control. She turns up the vibrator and for a second she swears she's seeing stars dance in front of eyes or are those blinding Christmas lights as the mindless pleasure just climbed to new levels. He starts moving faster and each stroke deliciously rougher with his cock like a heated stone. Stroke after stroke and she is whimpering now, the pressure so intense she may barely survive.  Hanging by a thread she grabs the bed covers and he leans in and whispers some sexy dirty words to her and she melts into endless convulsions.  He knows he's a goner as his breath rushes out,  his hips jam forward, his body quaking and erupts with a long toe numbing climax. Damn - he gasps as he collapses on her neck.  He can still feel her body twitching around him and she is face planted in the bed.   He stays there a few minutes before pulling free and falling to the bed on his side. She laughs, groans and reaches out to him and says Can't Move.  Give me a few minutes.  This Christmas gift might need new batteries.   He leans over grabbing her waist and leans in and whispers - Happy Holidays Sexy.
Dear Mr. Yum (2)
Posted:Oct 3, 2019 4:08 pm
Last Updated:Jul 6, 2020 6:52 pm

Dear Mr. Yum,

Yoo-Hoo,  Over here Mr. Yum.  I'm am pretty darn sure I saw you again today.   We need to seriously stop having these Missed Connections Mr. Yum.   I'm not sure my heart can handle it.   And my girl parts ?  Well gosh darn Mr. Yum I can only change my panties so many times in one day.  What are you doing to me?   I could swear you are doing it all intentionally.

So was that you I saw at the gas station the other day?  I know it was Mr. Yum.  Definitely You.  I was watching really closely.  I saw you wink at me.  Well pretty sure.  There was that gust of wind and you did rub your eye but I swear you looked up and winked at me.  Maybe both eyes.  My heart went pitter-patter.  I almost dropped the darn nozzle but the attendant was staring at me.  I almost gave her a mean look but I only had eyes for you.   Did you see me wave back Mr Yum?   I was kinda trying to do this one handed thingy but it might have looked a bit unusual Mr. Yum.  That darn wind blew my hair right into my mouth and well the wave kinda might have looked like I was force feeding myself some hair instead of removing it - but I know you saw me Mr. Yum.  You kinda squinted in my direction.  After all,  how many amusing things do you get to see at a gas station Mr. Yum?

So Mr. Yum are you a boxer or brief kinda guy?  Or maybe commando?  Whew - the thought of that is seriously hot Mr. Yum.   The girl parts are zinging now.   Or maybe its those hot flashes but wowza Mr. Yum you take my breath away.   Pssst... I'm always fantasizing about you.  Can't help it Mr. Yum.   Not in a crazy girl weird stalker chick way - not me Mr. Yum.  More like in the way I just want to lick you to death kinda way.  You don't think that's over the top - do you Mr. Yum?   

I was at that popular coffee shop the other day Mr. Yum - and I could swear you were in front of me.  Definitely you.   Seriously Mr. Yum - what was that woman doing next to you?  Clearly we seem to be having some trouble with our communication (well ok, we've never actually communicated which is really the main issue) but seriously a babe next to you?   You have your own personal sex slave less than three feet away and you are out with another woman?  Sigh.  Pretty sure she wouldn't do the things I would Mr. Yum.   Pretty sure she doesn't fantasize about every part of your body the same way I do.  Pretty sure her girl parts are probably frozen.  I get it Mr. Yum.  You were trying to make me jealous.   Well you succeeded.  I had to go home and pull out ALL the sex toys.  All three shoeboxes full.  Once wasn't enough, twice wasn't enough and three times might have been too much but Mr. Yum - you were the star of my porn fantasies.   I may never recover from that day.  I might never walk into that coffee shop again for fear of sex toy PTSD.  

I just wanted to make sure you knew I was thinking about you again, Mr. Yum.   I'm a woman of many talents.   Maybe I need to repeat that .... many talents.  Wink, Wink.

Ms. Curvaceous
Flirty Fridays
Posted:Sep 6, 2019 10:16 am
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2020 4:49 am

The bar is crowded, noisy and filled with the atmosphere of adults on the prowl. We agreed to meet at this location to fulfill our demand for some role playing. It had a been awhile and I was looking forward to meeting you. I scanned the bar area but didn't see you yet so opted to grab a drink and wait it out. The dress was skintight hugging every curve. It was meant to get attention and provoke a response. From the appreciative glances my way it seemed to be doing the trick for both the men and women in the crowd. I smell like a warm vanilla cookie and it gets noticed those I pass. Who can resist wanting a taste of a warm cookie? I stroll up to the bar and order my drink and while I'm waiting I feel a set of eyes on and know it can only be you. I turn around and see your smile as you head my way. There is a certain lust filled gleam in your eyes as you scan from head to toe enjoying what you see. The temperature in the room seems to have heated up causing my heart to race a bit. I should be downright chilly with the AC pumping in this place but your scintillating scorching stare is hotter than the Texas heat outside.

You approach wondering how the hell I can walk in those heels but the thought quickly leaves your mind when I reach up and place my arms around your neck, slink my body right up against yours and proceed to devour your mouth with mine. A kiss was long overdue. heated warm all consuming kiss gets the blood roaring in your head, punches your gut and has all things lower pumping with blood. My pussy is throbbing with arousal and I can feel myself getting wet with wanting you so badly. I can feel your delight at my boldness. We aren't shy showing each other our affection. I'm hearing some whistles and yeah I want what she's having remarks. So I look at you and smirk. We just spiced up the room and everyone wants a taste.

Lady luck seems to be on our side tonight as we find a small table in the corner. Devouring our drinks your hand never leaves my thigh with your fingers circling and circling higher as if they are wondering what's underneath. Our smalltalk and laughs never seem to be enough. You're a brilliant conversationalist and I love watching how you think. I could talk for hours with you and find myself aroused beyond belief. I'd let you whisper anything and everything in my ear as I love the sound of your voice. There is a certain chemical attraction I get when around a thinker and you just do it for me and push all my buttons.

My hand on your upper thigh has a mind of its own as my inhibitions are lowered from the drink. I'm slowly teasing you as you sit and try to ignore it. Your own fingers are getting bolder and I find myself wanting to share this experience. You feel yourself getting harder as my hand reaches upward to caress you and outline the feel of your cock. It practically dances in my hand wanting more attention but constrained damn zipper. Your fingers have reached underneath my dress to start caressing the outline of my pussy beneath the panties. You're outlining my pussy lips and going up and down the slit over and over again. Your finger slowly goes to the edge of the panty line then underneath. I'm instinctively holding my breath. My mind is screaming - yes I want more - go there, do it. My own fingers are wrapped around as much of your cock as I can get to but I'm constrained your pants and the fact we are in a very public intoxicating environment. I don't want to share you. I lean in to you and start nibbling on your neck. A playful bite, suck and lick and I whisper some words into your ear. I stand up, smile to you and head to the back of the bar.

I stroll into the women's restroom - several stalls with long doors. It's an upscale place and the amenities are nice. No one is around so I head to one of the stalls and I hear the restroom door open and know it's you. You are right behind me. You enter the stall, close the door and pull me against you and proceed to devour my mouth as if you haven't kissed anyone in months. I'm melting in your arms trying to angle for the deepest most intimate kiss. I can feel your hard throbbing cock through my dress. Your hands slide down and lift the dress to my waist. You glance down and chuckle at the cute little polka panties with the bow over my pussy. You slide the dress down my arms so it it's now just wrapped around my middle and you slide my bra cups down so my breasts spill out into your waiting hands. I'm already hard and pebbled and you quickly work, pinching, pulling my nipples as my moans get louder. You lean down to suck the nipple in my mouth working into a frenzy. I'm shuddering at this point from the pure unadulterated desire and heat flowing through . Then you say - I can't wait, turn around, hands on the wall. I turn around as you slide my panties off and have your fill of my ass. My tattoo is on display for you to see as you part my thighs and quickly nestle your hard delicious cock at my ass. You pull my ass to you as you reach underneath parting my folds and push the head of your cock to my wet dripping opening. I'm so aroused you easily slide through the first inch and then have to push your way inside till your balls are nestled to my ass. I'm squirming in delight and no way to stop the moans of how good you feel and the pressure from this angle. I can tell you are really horny and demanding and this release will be just what we both need. Your pumping is getting so intense and I'm in a mindless delirious place feeling two heated bodies together in pleasure. I'm talking dirty to you asking you to pound and fuck and you can't seem to get enough. You keep hitting my g-spot and I can feel myself gushing inside releasing fluid with every stroke. The buildup is tremendous and I bear down gripping your dick with my pussy walls knowing I'm so close as I give myself over to the waves of orgasmic shuddering pleasure and my muscles ripple and intensify with every stroke. You are riding my orgasm and prolonging my pleasure as I feel you swell and then gush into me spurting stream after stream into .

I'm breathing heavy and you are leaning into . It's going to take a few minutes for us to recover from . I can hear someone else in the restroom giggling. I reach up with my hand to touch your face giving you the reassurance everything is ok and was simply amazing. It doesn't have to be said with words - we know each other. You pull out of and I can feel your already leaking out riding down my leg. I grab some toilet paper to wipe up. You look at me with the dress still very much only in the middle of my body and you lean in for our kiss. soul-touching kiss confirms the passion and excitement we have between us. I immediately start to redress so we can exit and head back inside.

We grab another drink and sit in a different corner. The tension has been released for the moment. Your finger is itching to go back to what it was previously doing. We look at each other and laugh. You're insatiable. So I open my legs and give you access as your finger gets all slippery and wet sliding inside of me then circling my clit, playing with it. My eyes are half closed and I'm wondering how I'm going to survive the night.
Holding out for a Hero
Posted:Aug 20, 2019 2:03 pm
Last Updated:Oct 18, 2019 7:14 pm

Eagerly awaiting my arrival, you're anxious and a bit nervous. Your mouth
waters in anticipation and your palms are sweaty as you try to picture the events unfolding. You gave a key and knew I would show up shortly. You just didn't know what to expect. I had warned you it would be a surprise. You adored surprises and looked forward to each and every one. It was like getting your
own personal present each time we met. Who wouldn't want that?

Using a key, I opened the door slightly. I was wearing a long overcoat covered almost every inch of me except of course the boots. You couldn't hide the boots. The red thigh high stiletto heels were vibrant and outrageous and so sexy only a few can truly appreciate the look. I knew you would adore them. Maybe even worship them a little. (A can hope) When I walked in the room you were likely in the bathroom so I decided to take a few minutes to get myself ready. I took off the overcoat and pulled my hair accessories to make sure everything was in place. Damn, this outfit was tight and it was going take a miracle to keep breasts from spilling out. Leaning over might not even be possible. I seriously should have done some more heavy-duty aerobic activity this week. Damn that slice of chocolate cake.

It felt like forever before you came and saw me and just stopped to stare. It was a great costume and I knew I looked the role. You were staring so hard I thought maybe something might be wrong. Your eyes took in every darn inch from the knee- boots to the barely-there panties/skirt, to the cinched deep burgundy bustier and all the way up to the metallic headband. Let's not forget about the golden lasso coiled the waist. Yeah, the lasso. You were looking it with wonder.

I think you said it all in just word - Really?
Then you laughed. I guess I kinda laughed back - it was hard not to. It's a pretty outrageous costume.

For a second I think my mind-short circuited. I mean ... who would wear such a costume a damn overcoat? How the hell did she do this? I feel like a all tongue-tied. She's so smoking I swear my cock might be trying push through the damn zipper and . The outfit is truly sinfully, seductively sexy and molded every curve of her body. I just want to trace with my hand every
single inch of it and maybe my slide hands underneath. I think amazed she could think of such a creative costume. My very own Wonder Woman for the evening. The top is so tight wondering if her breasts are the only thing holding it up. If I pushed it down would I hear a 'pop'? Even her hair is curled in the exact same way. While this is great to - thinking all I want to do is strip her of this and have own personal way with her. I wonder what she is up to?

She says: I hear you've been searching for a hero. here to audition for the role. Why don't you take a seat?

So I take a seat on the nearby chair. pretty anxious to see where exactly she is taking this. Am I a participant and how the heck will this unfold.

She walks over to turn some music on. The music is dark and erotic with a seductive beat. Her hips start to slowly move with the music and our eyes meet. She smiles, .... alluring and teasing as if she's daring me to away.

I can't believe doing this. But hey - I can see I have his full attention and invested 0%. He seems captivated. So it's time to get this show going. My hair is down all loose, wild and slightly curly and I shake it for effect. The music takes over as my arms and hands slowly caress my body and skin for him. He watches every movement. I turn around and continue gyrating movements then slowly lean over so you can see that scrap of skirt material and glimpses my silky black thong. I turn my head towards you and run my tongue over my lips. You're mesmerized. Your very own personal erotic hero, truly a rare treat. Turning around, while moving my body to the seductive song, I start unzipping my top. watching you as I remove it and my breasts fall free. Full and curvy and very aroused. Delicious. I have your full attention as you stare at and beckon with a finger. As if you could make do what you want.

I walk over to your chair, turn around and start removing the mini-skirt, sliding and slinking it off my hips, down my legs and boots and onto the floor. The thong is barely hiding much but it does make a statement. I take the lasso off the skirt and attach it to a little loop I put on the side of the thong.

You're very aroused and enjoying your personal entertainment. It's every 's dream. Turning around, I lean into you to steal a deep tongue sucking kiss. ravenous. Your hands are my sides, touching and feeling the smoothness and you can smell my sweet alluring scent that is beckoning you to continue the kiss. Mmmmm... so yummy.

I stand up, move your legs together then I sit down staddling you. I start unbuttoning your shirt and undressing you as slowly licking your neck, chin and up to your ear. After I have you shirtless, my hands stroke your delectable body while your hands have a mind of their own and they feast on my breasts, squeezing, sliding and pinching the sensitive nipples and creating enough friction to have purring in delight. I close my eyes reveling in the pleasure your hands are giving . I can feel myself getting so aroused and wet and I want to squirm and push against your groin. Instead, I slowly unzip your pants pushing them to the floor and reach inside to touch your silky cock. So hard, so ready and all mine. I slowly end our little lap action and stand up. so aroused and know it won't take much for to climax. I grab the lasso, slide it down and discard it. I walk around the back of the chair and wrap your hands together with the lasso knowing you will surrender to . I can hear you chuckle.

I walk to the front of you and slowly start straddling your legs so my pussy comes in with your hard cock. Then I lean in for a devouring kiss. As I rub breasts against your chest, I slowly start nibbling my way down your neck. My hands have reached down to grab your cock and pump up and down. My other hand is now slightly cupping your balls and reaching lower to excite you even further. I can hear your moans as I have my way with you. I rub your precum over the top of your dick and then position myself so that you're at my pussy entrance. Ever so slowly I push you inch by inch inside my wet sheath. You moan as the tight walls of flesh tightly encase you. So good and so damn tight. I start to lift and lower as I ride you cowgirl style with your hands still bound behind your back. Your staring at my tits jiggling in front of your . I lower my hands and start to caress your balls from behind as I ride you. so so wet and it's making it slick. Then I take my hand and rub it on my clit and you are watching mesmerized as I start to bear down and get tight. My climax is close. I increase the pace and feel myself getting to the point of no return and as my climax descends on me - my pussy starts clamping down on your cock and gasping now as the incredible pleasure takes over and rolls through over and over again. My body is on fire and I can feel you coming so close so I reach you and you use my finger rubbing it near your anus and you go ballistic. You start thrusting and your climax hits you with a roar. I can feel your hard spurts inside my body that cause my own internal walls to contract. You groan in mindless delight. Your head thumps against my shoulder as you try to regain some control.

It takes us a few minutes to recover from our delicious treat. reminded that I still have thigh-high boots on and a headband.

You lean in grab a sensual intimate kiss. You nod your head where your hands are tied. I kinda laugh. What did you think - we were done?
Finally finished it ... Mistress is complete.
Posted:Jun 25, 2019 3:33 pm
Last Updated:Jun 25, 2019 3:40 pm

I finally got around to completing Mistress. Enjoy. xoxo

Now on to finish Moon Tan (mr. sexy airport man).
Triple Fs
Posted:May 17, 2019 7:25 am
Last Updated:Jun 24, 2019 4:16 pm

You simply amaze me. It's that feeling I get when I see you. My heart races, my breasts tingle and I really just want to rip my clothes off or maybe yours. If you told me this a few months ago I would have laughed at you but now that I'm hooked, it's like an automatic response. I'm salivating when I just see your seductive smile. Too bad they haven't figured out how to put your sex appeal into a bottle.

I'm casually leaning against the wall wearing another of my surprises. Pure adult enjoyment on this absolutely F'ing Fantastic Friday (Triple Fs). You can practically feel and taste the electric excitement and the passion ready to explode. You notice the shoes first - kinda hard not to considering you're wondering how I could possibly wear them or walk in them without killing myself (high black platform sandals and toenails painted bright pink). Your eyes travel upward to take in the plain white button-down oxford shirt that reaches the tips of my thighs. It's unbuttoned down to my waist and you can clearly see I'm not wearing a bra because my nipples are hard and erect poking through the material. My hair is down, long slightly wavy and traveling to about my breasts..alluring and arousing. All tousled as if I just had a long marathon of sex or if you had run your fingers through and messed it all up.

I stood up and walked over, ran my hands up your chest, circled your neck and said 'I've missed you.' It had been a while since our last encounter but we knew that made it more special, more exciting, more tantalizing and more important to fulfill our illicit fantasies. You leaned over me and kissed my lips, softly, sweetly - as I parted my mouth inviting you deeper. You slanted your mouth over mine and tangled with my tongue mating insatiably. Oh, it was delicious, slow and made me melt. It was filled with languid sexuality and pure hunger. Your mouth made sweet love with mine, your teeth nibbled, tongue licking and seducing. I moaned and sank into your sensual embrace. Your hands slinked underneath the bottom of the shirt lifting it slowly and caressing my skin. You could feel my skimpy panties- just a string in the back and a small v in the front - practically nothing but so damn sexy. You backed me up to the side of the bed and slowly unbuttoned the shirt, sliding it down my arms and to the carpet. You smiled at the panties - bright pink. 'Turn around' - you asked. Then you said ' Bend forward and put your arms on the bed.'

You looked your fill of my position and those skimpy panties with my ass up in carnal invitation. You passed your hand over the rounded cheeks with delight and removed the panties. You quickly removed your clothes and I stole a peek and could see you were very aroused and hard. You moved forward and pressed your erection against my ass feeling my heat and dampness. Mmmmm, perfect fit with those shoes.

You placed your hands on my breasts and started playing with my nipples, rolling them between your fingers and pinching them. I was squirming in delight and against your erection. My body wanted more, I always wanted more. You were going to make me beg. Then you slid your hand between my legs and touched my hot and heated flesh. You started stroking me till you felt me swell and pulse with need. I pleaded with you - 'now, more, more'. You leaned over and spread me further. Then I could feel the head of your cock pushing in and stretching me. I moaned in delight and longing since it felt so good. You pushed more, I was always so damn tight. Then you started that exquisite mating dance of pushing in and pulling out, you appreciated the picture of me bent over, my tattoo in your vision, as you took me. You were so insatiable and demanding tonight. I loved that about you as you could easily read my moods and knew I wanted you so badly. You kept the pace making me moan in delight as you felt my juices let down all over your heated flesh.

I was so close to a climax and you could feel it. Your hand reached under and started stroking my clitoris. I was squirming from the pleasure and could feel it building and ready to explode. I arched my back and felt the tremendous waves of pleasure as they took me and pulsed through me. I knew you had held back and let me enjoy myself and I have no idea how you had such control. After a few moments, you removed your cock still hard and erect and you stood me up and turned me around.

I immediately knew what you wanted. I leaned in and kissed you - quick, fast, devouring then I started working my way down your chest, your stomach, and your hips - light kisses and licking till I was kneeling in front of you in perfect height with your hard, erect cock. My tongue reached out and started licking your smooth testicles. Long licks then sucking that skin. I moved to the underside and continued my delicious licking torture. Your hands moved to my hair and pushed me further towards you. Then I moved up your shaft and looking at you worked the head of your cock around with my tongue. Then my lips parted and I placed the head into my mouth. All warm and wet. I sucked my way down the length. Mmmm ---- up and down in my mouth -- sucking and so wet. My hands moved to play with your balls, stroking, squeezing till I could feel you getting tighter. I applied more pressure and increased my mouths suction over that silken smooth skin. You pushed harder against me - grabbing my hair. I could feel you tighten and then you exploded in my mouth - warm, salty, cum filling my mouth. I licked my way back up your body letting you recover and just enjoy the sensations. Then I leaned in to give you a nice salty kiss of shared pleasure.

I knew we were only getting started and I was so damn horny from giving you the blowjob. I could feel I was on the edge of my own second orgasm. You backed me up to the bed and said 'Lie down and open yourself for me'.

I'd do anything I was so horny. You reached over and got my favorite little toy, my pink rabbit vibrator. Then you laid down on the bed with me, positioning yourself so you could use the vibrator with your head near my breasts. Your fingers checked my wetness - one finger then two and moving in and out to tease me. You switched the vibrator on and started pushing the head inside. So wet and so easy. You positioned the little bunny on my clitoris and then slid the variable control to slow so the head would start turning inside me. It felt so good and so wicked to have someone else playing with my toy on me. It increased my excitement as I watched you. Then you leaned over and started sucking on my nipples and biting them. My back was arching off the bed in sheer delight. You slid the variable control on the rabbit causing it to vibrate against my clitoris. My mind had wandered and was in this place where the pleasure was so intense and so wonderful, I thought I might burst. You increased the rotating head and I was moaning in ecstasy. I was going to explode - the sensations too much - I could feel it. My breasts were tightening, I bore down on the vibrator to cause more stimulation and my hand gripped the bed as my back arched and the orgasm exploded inside of me. My insides were shuddering, quaking and my muscles out of control and it was minutes before I could feel my body again. Then you switched off the controls knowing how sensitive I had gotten. I had to take a moment or two to recover from the intensity. Then I leaned on my side, propping myself up with my arm and said 'Come here'. You scooted up and we kissed. Gentle, lovely, sweet and full of our shared pleasures and these precious moments.

I pulled back and with that disheveled look and smile said 'What now?'.
You always enjoy my insatiability and my carefree attitude. You're thinking ...
Damn, I love F'ing Fantastic Fridays.
Dear Mr. Sex Quiz Man
Posted:May 16, 2019 9:47 am
Last Updated:Aug 3, 2020 3:13 pm

I'm taking your sex quiz online and I'm failing. That's right, I'M FAILING.
My jaw is dropping and I'm sitting here stupified. Mr. Sex Quiz Man, whoever you are that made up this quiz - you clearly haven't met me AND you didn't let me test the sex quiz to see if it even made any sense.

1) Who has more sex? Answer: Men. Once again Mr. Sex Quiz man - IF I met Mr. Yum - I wouldn't be reading your online sex quiz. We would be having sex ALL THE TIME. Why should guys get all the fun?

2) How often do most Americans have sex? 62 TIMES a year. OMG! I'm not sure I can catch up in my lifetime. Mr. Sex Quiz Man - WHO are you talking to AND where are they? Mr. Sex Quiz Man - you are making me somewhat depressed now.

3) How long does sexual intercourse last on average? 5.4 minutes WTF!! Clearly, this quiz is defective. Everyone on here can prove this wrong! Is this like old lady/man sex? Ahhh ... they studied 500 couples. They must have gone to a senior citizen community and passed out the test. What happened to the 4 hour marathon session? 5.4 minutes - I'm shaking my head. THAT is just wrong, wrong, wrong on so many levels.

4) I even FAILED the glass or two of red wine a day question. My AH HAH moment proven with my five minutes of research failed me. The answer is 1 glass of red wine for women increases your libido!! For guys, it is two. YOU HEARD IT HERE therefore, it must be true.

5) What percentage of married folks between 25 and 60 have sex 3-4 times a month? A MONTH? Just under 50% AND They think this good!

Look at the answer: This is a higher rate than single people or people who have partners (not spouses) in that same age range. Guess we know who’s getting all the action.

I'm speechless. I want that to be my weekly rate - Mr. Yum ARE YOU HEARING me? We should try and make it our daily rate but I may wear you out!

6) If you want to boost a man's sex drive - You should ..... wait for it ...... are you still waiting... Turn on MORE LIGHTS. Hmmm... I guess he wants a closeup of your V-Jay-jay kinda like your ob/gyn. And here I thought it could be music. Silly me.

7) When men watch a lot of porn it can lead to trouble with intimacy.
Mr. Sex Quiz Man - that's because they want their partner to be porn stars. Do you even watch porn? It's so hot it's scalding.
Mr. Yum - are you catching all this? You are the lead in my porn fantasies - I'm pretty sure my fantasies are really intimate. Don't pay any attention to these silly quizzes.

Holy Cow ! Mr. Sex Quiz man - you say that during pregnancy sometimes a woman's libido increases. Uhmmm... Mr. Sex Quiz man - I would have used every vegetable in the produce section and then some when I was pregnant. I was so damn horny all the time I thought maybe something was wrong with me. I had dreams of orgies every night and had to resort to masturbating maybe 6, 7, or 8 times. I was insatiable.

Mr. Sex Quiz Man, may I suggest you go home Have more than two glasses of wine, don't turn on all the lights leave one off and have some sex that lasts longer than 5.4 minutes. Let's have fun and skew those results.

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