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That Thrill of a New Experience  

hotdreamer1000 62M
9642 posts
10/12/2021 2:34 pm

Last Read:
11/22/2021 4:08 am

That Thrill of a New Experience


Lots of missing words in this one - see my first comment for a readable version.

I read a question somewhere - "Where will all end? When you get used a kink does become normalised and then you for something new?"

The thrill of a new experience? Is that, really? sometimes is that. sometimes what you are looking for is more of an instinctive mental connection, the one which seems always just half out of reach. The one you had once or twice didn't you, a long time ago, at least you think you did, now you can't quite remember what it felt like....

He / she looked at you, your insides caught fire and you just melted. Suddenly you found yourself thinking how much you wanted do all those things that would seemed a bit too animal until you saw that on their face. That electric moment when you first know they want you the way you want them. A shiver that goes through your veins when they touch your hand, that buzz when your lips first meet. I'm not sure matters whether they picked up on your kinks or whether they just looked inside and seen the real you. in the end that is almost the thing, and that's why the two feelings seem so similar?

I don't enough experience know, but me, a kink feels a bit like another way experience that initial hunger. You can't replicate the feeling of falling in love, but you can come close with a lustful kink? Especially if your partner knows and understands, or better still, shares your kink. But can a true kink be temporary, something you can move on from? me, a fetish seems grow if you feed , not become old. I don't know where came from, but the gothic always turns me on. But lies dormant in me until I see a woman with a black square-cut fringe. Or when Gothic walks by my window. I saw her yesterday, just as I was getting out of my car. She stopped and we chatted. She was smiling and happy. made me feel good. A few years back when we nearly got together she wasn't really in a good place, and made me happy see her now with her life all sorted out. And I know all the time we were both still thinking, "I wish we could slept together." I could see in her eyes. But we aren't going revisit that. We both know it wouldn't ended well. The hunger is still , but we don't feed . if we did then in the end would get old. I don't want find out. We are both happy with it the way it is. But then she doesn't<b> wear </font></b>all black and the dark purple lipstick or her hair like that anymore. I don't know how easily I could control myself if she did, lol.

's another kink I but I don't talk about anymore. 's not particularly unusual but could be detrimental someone wanted share with me, and I don't want encourage that. But stays with me, I can't imagine needing move on for a new one.

"Where will all end?" was the question. Do you always move on the next kink, like a jaded porn addict? I don't think so. From the I know I don't imagine the person asked the question really feeling like that either. Or that's just me.

Because I am lucky. For me, if I a meeting of minds, then whether brings lust or friendship, I always feel a new thrill.

hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/12/2021 2:38 pm

First Comment / Word Glitch Protector:

I read a question somewhere - "Where will it all end? When you get used to a kink does it become normalised and then you have to look for something new?"

The thrill of a new experience? Is it that, really? Maybe sometimes it is that. Maybe sometimes what you are looking for is more of an instinctive mental connection, the one which seems always just half out of reach. The one you had once or twice didn't you, a long time ago, at least you think you did, only now you can't quite remember what it felt like....

He / she looked at you, your insides caught fire and you just melted. Suddenly you found yourself thinking how much you wanted to do all those things that would have seemed a bit too animal until you saw that look on their face. That electric moment when you first know they want you the same way you want them. A shiver that goes through your veins when they touch your hand, that buzz when your lips first meet. I'm not sure it matters whether they have picked up on your kinks or whether they have just looked inside and seen the real you. Maybe in the end that is almost the same thing, and that's why the two feelings seem so similar?

I don't have enough experience to know, but to me, a kink feels a bit like another way to experience that initial hunger. You can't replicate the feeling of falling in love, but you can come close with a lustful kink? Especially if your partner knows and understands, or better still, shares your kink. But can a true kink be temporary, something you can move on from? To me, a fetish seems to grow if you feed it, not become old. I don't know where it came from, but the gothic look always turns me on. But it lies dormant in me until I see a woman with a black square-cut fringe. Or when Gothic Girl walks by my window. I saw her yesterday, just as I was getting out of my car. She stopped and we chatted. She was smiling and happy. It made me feel good. A few years back when we nearly got together she wasn't really in a good place, and it made me happy to see her now with her life all sorted out. And I know all the time we were both still thinking, "I wish we could have slept together." I could see it in her eyes. But we aren't going to revisit that. We both know it wouldn't have ended well. The hunger is still there, but we don't feed it. Maybe if we did then in the end it would get old. I don't want to find out. We are both happy with it the way it is. But then she doesn't wear all black and the dark purple lipstick or have her hair like that anymore. I don't know how easily I could control myself if she did, lol.

There's another kink I have but I don't talk about it anymore. It's not particularly unusual but it could be detrimental to someone who wanted to share it with me, and I don't want to encourage that. But it stays with me, I can't imagine needing to move on for a new one.

"Where will it all end?" was the question. Do you always have to move on to the next kink, like a jaded porn addict? I don't think so. From the little I know I don't imagine the person who asked the question really feeling like that either. Or maybe that's just me.

Because I am lucky. For me, if I have a meeting of minds, then whether it brings lust or friendship, I always feel a new thrill.


Only_one_14 52F
4074 posts
10/12/2021 6:24 pm

Kink for me is something I look at for awhile and find something else for awhile and circle back like- oh yeah, babe! There is always something or someone who can give you a lustfull thrill.

A Man who knows how to use his tongue is extremely useful!


smartasswoman 64F  
35226 posts
10/12/2021 9:59 pm

As you alluded, I think there’s a difference between a kink and a fetish. I know a couple of foot fetishists and I can assure you it will NEVER get old for them.

Whereas someone who’s just fooling around, looking for something new to spice things up, yes they might get bored with a certain thing and want to move on to something else. Or, do the same thing but they need to get more extreme with it in order to feel the same thrill.

Sorry for such a clinical response to your post. It all kind of seems academic these days! *rueful smile*


hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/12/2021 10:44 pm

    Quoting smartasswoman:
    As you alluded, I think there’s a difference between a kink and a fetish. I know a couple of foot fetishists and I can assure you it will NEVER get old for them.

    Whereas someone who’s just fooling around, looking for something new to spice things up, yes they might get bored with a certain thing and want to move on to something else. Or, do the same thing but they need to get more extreme with it in order to feel the same thrill.

    Sorry for such a clinical response to your post. It all kind of seems academic these days! *rueful smile*
No need to apologise Smarty, and I can feel the resigned frustration in your words! But my blogs often have an academic side to them anyway, lol.

And you raise an interesting point, Apart from semantics (which people will often argue about, sometimes without even realising that's all it is) maybe a kink is different from a fetish. I'm not really sure if I was alluding to that or not, or if maybe you picked up on something which was a the back of my mind. Definitely I was thinking about the way one kink might be exciting only when it's new, but another stays with you for life for some deep seated reason you may not even be aware of.


hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/12/2021 10:45 pm

    Quoting Only_one_14:
    Kink for me is something I look at for awhile and find something else for awhile and circle back like- oh yeah, babe! There is always something or someone who can give you a lustfull thrill.
"There is always something or someone that can give you a lustful thrill." So true! Thanks for coming by.


G000dbuddy 34M  
1223 posts
10/13/2021 12:17 am

looking for something new

goodbuddy781


Jules1590 53F
7941 posts
10/13/2021 4:39 am

Hmmmm... I thoroughly enjoyed this morsel of a post. Decidedly yummy.

I think Smarty drills down quite well on the difference between kinks and fetishes.

My kinks (if we want to ascribe them so) have evolved over time. I grow concerned occasionally that they'll consume me, like a, hmmmm... "jaded porn addict!" lol. I do enjoy the thrill but I think it is more the thrill of my partner than it is the act itself. You're correct in your supposition.

You have piqued my curiosity though... what is your other kink that shant be spoken?


hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/13/2021 5:51 am

    Quoting Jules1590:
    Hmmmm... I thoroughly enjoyed this morsel of a post. Decidedly yummy.

    I think Smarty drills down quite well on the difference between kinks and fetishes.

    My kinks (if we want to ascribe them so) have evolved over time. I grow concerned occasionally that they'll consume me, like a, hmmmm... "jaded porn addict!" lol. I do enjoy the thrill but I think it is more the thrill of my partner than it is the act itself. You're correct in your supposition.

    You have piqued my curiosity though... what is your other kink that shant be spoken?
Lovely comment Jules.

The kink that shan't be spoken er....well it shan't be spoken, shall it!

I guess I could maybe talk about it, but not on here. And I would have to be sure the person I was telling wouldn't say, "I could do that."


BeccaLuvs 59F
20554 posts
10/13/2021 5:51 am

Guess we, people, hotdreamer can be complex - yep there will be some things, (or "kinks"), that def do it for you, and yet we also do need to experiment and experience new and exciting - to as you say "experience the thrill", plus it keeps life moving and not sameoh? Am also mighty curious about your secret "kink"! Oh, and "Happy Hump Day"!

..... And always 'hold onto all those sexy thoughts'!
(Remember if you feel like taking part in some sexy fun then click here!) Come on Some Sketch Fun
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hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/13/2021 5:52 am

What, you, or me?


hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/13/2021 11:32 am

    Quoting BeccaLuvs:
    Guess we, people, hotdreamer can be complex - yep there will be some things, (or "kinks"), that def do it for you, and yet we also do need to experiment and experience new and exciting - to as you say "experience the thrill", plus it keeps life moving and not sameoh? Am also mighty curious about your secret "kink"! Oh, and "Happy Hump Day"!
Hi Becca. It's nice to make you curious, and I should have known that would happen, but I didn't really mean it to, and for the reasons mentioned I don't usually tell anyone about it!


missthee 55F  
4457 posts
10/20/2021 12:37 am

The thrill of a new experience - could it be that something there is not so "new" and it's actually thrilling because we sense something "familiar." A new person a new circumstance but something in their features - looks, or smell, or voice - consciously or unconsciously take us back to something in our past that we once enjoyed or cherished.


hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/20/2021 8:55 am

    Quoting missthee:
    The thrill of a new experience - could it be that something there is not so "new" and it's actually thrilling because we sense something "familiar." A new person a new circumstance but something in their features - looks, or smell, or voice - consciously or unconsciously take us back to something in our past that we once enjoyed or cherished.
Oh yes - that's a very good point Missthee. I sometimes have had the feeling that the reason I am drawn to someone is due to a sub-conscious distant memory which makes them seem attractive for reasons I am not fully aware of. I had forgotten that.


Violette001 49F
4614 posts
10/22/2021 11:12 pm

Out with it, Dreamer!!! your reason for not sharing your secret kink makes absolutely No sense AT all!!!!

"Do not put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket"
--Author Unknown



hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/25/2021 3:29 am

    Quoting Violette001:
    Out with it, Dreamer!!! your reason for not sharing your secret kink makes absolutely No sense AT all!!!!
Ha ha, well, I might not have made sense to you, but there really is a good reason for keeping it a secret, for the good of everyone. I might be able to tell you about it, but I would have to be sure you would not be going to say, "I could do that." And of course I can't be sure of that without saying what it is! lol.

Great to see you by the way!


Violette001 49F
4614 posts
10/25/2021 7:38 pm

Normally, i'd hesitate - but -- i learned something about myself some months back -- that the things i'm willing to experiment with, or not, don't seem to be related to the thing itself, but rather to the person i'm adventuring with! So you can be Absolutely Sure that i'd say "I could do that!" - which for some reason is the WRONG Answer!

But, i am insanely intrigued -- you have a dangerous secret??!! It has to be kept secret 'for the good of everyone'??!!! is this something like a nuclear weapon of mass destruction?! It doesn't match with the Kind and Gentle Hearted Dreamer that i know!

WHO are you, Dreamer??!!

Good to see you too, Dreamer! (that is, if it truly IS you! )

"Do not put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket"
--Author Unknown



hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/26/2021 9:47 am

    Quoting Violette001:
    Normally, i'd hesitate - but -- i learned something about myself some months back -- that the things i'm willing to experiment with, or not, don't seem to be related to the thing itself, but rather to the person i'm adventuring with! So you can be Absolutely Sure that i'd say "I could do that!" - which for some reason is the WRONG Answer!

    But, i am insanely intrigued -- you have a dangerous secret??!! It has to be kept secret 'for the good of everyone'??!!! is this something like a nuclear weapon of mass destruction?! It doesn't match with the Kind and Gentle Hearted Dreamer that i know!

    WHO are you, Dreamer??!!

    Good to see you too, Dreamer! (that is, if it truly IS you! )
It is definitely me! How can I prove it? I can prove it by calling you a wannabe slut, (lol) and saying I actually am a bit worried that if we spoke about this you would, being the wannabe slut that you are, say, "Yep, I can do that." I am getting turned on just thinking about it.

So part of me really really wants to tell you about it, and the the part of me knows I probably shouldn't. "Dangerous toys we have been given" (more proof) and all that. Such is life huh?


Violette001 49F
4614 posts
10/28/2021 4:53 pm

hahaha ok. i see it's still you!

So, what are the chances that i run into another man just like you?! He's also protecting me from himself!

But... i am truly blessed to have so many good men in my life! While 98% of the women in the world are whining about all the good men being gone, i'm just sitting here, thinking, i know all of them! hahaha

With that said - i DID think of ONE situation in which my answer to you would be: "Hell NO, DREAMER! do you think i'm a wanna-be-slut or something?! " -- If i ever find myself in a relationship with one of these many good men that i know - then - i'd be closing the door for adventures with all other good men out there.

UNLESS -- i share your idea with my man and he says: "Oh Hell yeah! You could do that!!!" So what do you suppose will happen then?! lol Would it still be so dangerous?!

"Do not put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket"
--Author Unknown



hotdreamer1000 62M
12248 posts
10/29/2021 3:41 am

    Quoting Violette001:
    hahaha ok. i see it's still you!

    So, what are the chances that i run into another man just like you?! He's also protecting me from himself!

    But... i am truly blessed to have so many good men in my life! While 98% of the women in the world are whining about all the good men being gone, i'm just sitting here, thinking, i know all of them! hahaha

    With that said - i DID think of ONE situation in which my answer to you would be: "Hell NO, DREAMER! do you think i'm a wanna-be-slut or something?! " -- If i ever find myself in a relationship with one of these many good men that i know - then - i'd be closing the door for adventures with all other good men out there.

    UNLESS -- i share your idea with my man and he says: "Oh Hell yeah! You could do that!!!" So what do you suppose will happen then?! lol Would it still be so dangerous?!
Imagine if my fetish was for you to go sky-diving naked without a parachute. (It wasn't that, but now I think about it that would be pretty sexy! lol. ) So I wouldn't want you to actually do that, would I, because it wouldn't exactly be good for you!

So this is something like that, only it isn't something which would instantly kill you, and it isn't anything disgusting, so you could well say, "I can do that" but it still wouldn't be good for you, so I wouldn't want to encourage it. Does that make enough sense?

Anyway you are sexy enough without any help from fetishes, lol, so there is no need for anything dangerous.


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