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What do you Remember?  

hotdreamer1000 61M
9579 posts
7/9/2021 4:02 am

Last Read:
7/22/2021 6:41 am

What do you Remember?


When years have gone by, and you reflect on past relationships (if you ever do) what do you remember the most?

Is it the pain of the break , or the sweetness of the first few months? Is it the companionship and the things you did together, or the sex? Or is it something less tangible; the feeling of who you were when you were with that person, or the sense of who they were and what being part of their life meant to you.

Maybe it is different in each case, and for different people. I don't know what I think, I just found myself day-dreaming about past loves today, and what they meant to me. And for me, it seems there is a kind of atmosphere about each relationship which defines it, and that is what I remember. I don't know if I could put that into words.

I do remember the sex too, and the heart ache. But mostly I think I remember how each time I felt differently about myself. And each time, I saw and shared my lover's hopes and dreams as well.

I hope she found them.

hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/9/2021 4:03 am

The Way We Were?

When years have gone by, and you reflect on past relationships (if you ever do) what do you remember the most?

Is it the pain of the break up, or the sweetness of the first few months? Is it the companionship and the things you did together, or the sex? Or is it something less tangible; the feeling of who you were when you were with that person, or the sense of who they were and what being part of their life meant to you.

Maybe it is different in each case, and for different people. I don't know what I think, I just found myself day-dreaming about past loves today, and what they meant to me. And for me, it seems there is a kind of atmosphere about each relationship which defines it, and that is what I remember. I don't know if I could put that into words.

I do remember the sex too, and the heart ache. But mostly I think I remember how each time I felt differently about myself. And each time, I saw and shared my lover's hopes and dreams as well.

I hope she found them.


AnewWoman 63F
266 posts
7/9/2021 4:54 am

Given enough time to ponder I remember most things about each relationship from meeting to ending. The period following the breakup is what probably stands out the most. The rehashing over and over again why did it end. Could I have done something differently.


jajo696 66F
3955 posts
7/9/2021 6:47 am

I remember the feeling th internal feeling of our meetings. I remember the connection, i felt we had. I remember the laughter. I remember how he took care of things, how he spoiled me. I remember the lessons and how i grew from our being together. ~


flannel_light 59F  
3975 posts
7/9/2021 7:20 am

I remember all the laughs and passion we had towards each other and seeing him recently after 11 years there were none of the passion for me. That's when I knew it was truly done and over. It was just a memory now

The Light is shinning and she is lonely and waiting in the darkness.


hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/9/2021 10:35 am

    Quoting AnewWoman:
    Given enough time to ponder I remember most things about each relationship from meeting to ending. The period following the breakup is what probably stands out the most. The rehashing over and over again why did it end. Could I have done something differently.
Yes, it's true, the soul searching time can end up preying on your mind a bit. Although I think most often there is nothing you could have "done" differently.

Sometimes of course you can be aware of a mistake you made which caused a problem, but if you don't have a specific event in mind, then I think most likely something would have gone wrong sooner or later just because the blend between the two of you didn't last. I have learned over the years that if two people want to stay together they can normally work out a way to do it, and if they don't want to they don't.

I try to learn from what goes wrong and be a better person, but I also try not to beat myself up and wish I was different, because as has been famously said, "you have to be yourself - everyone else is taken."

I suppose I feel now that it is very rare for a relationship never to come to an end, and so I try to remember the good times, because if I only ever allowed a relationship to start if I knew it couldn't end badly, then I might never have any, and I would certainly miss some good times!


hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/9/2021 10:37 am

    Quoting jajo696:
    I remember the feeling th internal feeling of our meetings. I remember the connection, i felt we had. I remember the laughter. I remember how he took care of things, how he spoiled me. I remember the lessons and how i grew from our being together. ~
Hi Jajo, good to see you. Yes, those are great things to take from a relationship, even if it ends. Thanks, you made me smile!


hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/9/2021 10:37 am

    Quoting flannel_light:
    I remember all the laughs and passion we had towards each other and seeing him recently after 11 years there were none of the passion for me. That's when I knew it was truly done and over. It was just a memory now
But still a fond memory I hope?


spunkycumfun 61M/66F
38437 posts
7/10/2021 7:53 am

I often daydream about my past relationships, generally with fondness and sometimes with regret especially with the passage of time.


hippiechick1967 57F
13154 posts
7/10/2021 11:23 am

I usually remember the good times and all the laughs we had. I rarely remember the sex unless it was extraordinarily good or bad.

Elevate me...


hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/12/2021 7:49 am

    Quoting hippiechick1967:
    I usually remember the good times and all the laughs we had. I rarely remember the sex unless it was extraordinarily good or bad.
"Extraordinarily good, or bad." Ha ha! Yes, me too exactly!


hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/12/2021 7:50 am

    Quoting spunkycumfun:
    I often daydream about my past relationships, generally with fondness and sometimes with regret especially with the passage of time.
That's nice to hear, yes, me too mostly.


agelesssexylegs 78F
980 posts
7/22/2021 3:47 am

With each new lover or relationship makes you different on the other side,after the break up,maybe not as strong as you went in,especially if one or the other called it a day but you live on until the next one you get involved with,up to you if it makes you stronger or weaker,your wants needs and emotions change over time


hotdreamer1000 61M
12167 posts
7/22/2021 6:41 am

    Quoting agelesssexylegs:
    With each new lover or relationship makes you different on the other side,after the break up,maybe not as strong as you went in,especially if one or the other called it a day but you live on until the next one you get involved with,up to you if it makes you stronger or weaker,your wants needs and emotions change over time
Yes, it's true, people can change you as much as events can. Some people can weather storms and don't change much though.


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