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I'd Rather Feel Pain Than Nothing At All  

infinitepoetry 50F  
101 posts
1/17/2020 2:51 pm
I'd Rather Feel Pain Than Nothing At All

In Freudian psychoanalysis, the pleasure principle (German: Lustprinzip) is the instinctive seeking of pleasure and avoiding of pain in order satisfy biological and psychological needs. Specifically, the pleasure principle is the driving force guiding the id. But what drives some of us feel pain as our pleasure principle rather than avoid?

There is the personality disorder of not being able feel anything at all unless pain is present. The inability feel anything - neither sadness, happiness, nor anything else, is labeled by the psychoanalytical gurus as being clinical melancholic depression. Many of our community self-harm and are cutters, will relate the cycle of hurting self feel anything at all. I don't know about you, but I have often wondered if the need feel pain in a sexual context is merely being too chicken-shit or lazy to commit self-harm on oneself. Therefore, we relent because we have an undying need to feel something rather than the abyss of nothing at all. It has ultimately been too long for me to remember experiencing coitus without some pain before, after, or during, but if I recall correctly, it was as boring as watching paint dry and about as emotionally touching.

Can we become ultimately numb to the pain we originally needed in order to feel something? Well of course we do, which is why I haven't continually ventured so far down the rabbit hole of breaking limits for fear there would be no return once a certain level was breached. The likelihood of stretching too far, like a rubber band that has lost its elasticity, is a very real possibility to . It is similar a drug addict has justified that they may like doing a little coke but they would never smoke it. They are chasing that and are faced with smoking it or nothing at all, and so they smoke it. The next stage they face is they can't get their pleasure fix unless they shoot it into their veins with a needle and so they succumb to the act in order to chase that again. When does it stop?

When the D/S connection between people has been a sustained tornadic fury, there will be no turning back. It could be said that the loss of this dynamic after experiencing it is akin to a mourning of epic proportions. , as we know, it is not so easy extricate oneself from attempting catch that higher than high intensity the addict was looking for. You may, in fact, do better realize that you will possibly never find that incredible force with another human being again. Does the id then seek the pleasure principle rather than keep doing self-harm by seeking the pain?

Perhaps we simply seek any pain at all so we can feel again, because being numb is such a damned bore

"You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust , and take hand
When the lights go , you'll understand
Pain without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all ""
Pain ~ Days Grace









HAMONMAN 60M
10061 posts
1/17/2020 7:35 pm

a heavy topic


justaguyinalaska 53M  
374 posts
1/18/2020 2:41 am

The *pleasure principle* referenced in your first paragraph also encompasses the endorphin *highs* that athletes (myself included) regularly enjoy and are stimulated by the pain of intense exercise. My (self-serving) conclusion is that this pursuit of *euphoria* is less about filling an emotional void and more about an addictive personality (I'm guilty on that one, too).

That said, I concur that depression and other mental disorders often play in an important role in self-harm, especially in the extreme behaviors (cutting) that you describe. Although I am not in the LS, my kinkster friends approach BDSM with the intensity and discipline of an athlete (inclusive of boundaries and thresholds), which suggests to me they are also chasing *euphoria* with the same positive addiction that keeps me slogging through ultra-endurance events.

Excellent blog-post!


NewName62 57M
11916 posts
1/18/2020 1:04 pm

I appreciate how thoughtful your postings are. You also curate excellent imagery.

[gulp]
Aaaaand...I just got hard.


infinitepoetry 50F  
97 posts
1/18/2020 4:16 pm

Oh I bet I can find heavier lol But yes it can turn into that


infinitepoetry 50F  
97 posts
1/18/2020 4:19 pm

    Quoting justaguyinalaska:
    The *pleasure principle* referenced in your first paragraph also encompasses the endorphin *highs* that athletes (myself included) regularly enjoy and are stimulated by the pain of intense exercise. My (self-serving) conclusion is that this pursuit of *euphoria* is less about filling an emotional void and more about an addictive personality (I'm guilty on that one, too).

    That said, I concur that depression and other mental disorders often play in an important role in self-harm, especially in the extreme behaviors (cutting) that you describe. Although I am not in the LS, my kinkster friends approach BDSM with the intensity and discipline of an athlete (inclusive of boundaries and thresholds), which suggests to me they are also chasing *euphoria* with the same positive addiction that keeps me slogging through ultra-endurance events.

    Excellent blog-post!
You hit the nail on the head


infinitepoetry 50F  
97 posts
1/18/2020 4:20 pm

    Quoting NewName62:
    I appreciate how thoughtful your postings are. You also curate excellent imagery.
Why thank you.....taking a bow


sexychelleforu 46F
2 posts
1/22/2020 4:45 pm

I agree. No pain is a waste of time. I never tried true bondage


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