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No conversation  

nerdygirl721 31F  
1921 posts
7/14/2020 9:32 pm
No conversation


Ugh. Maybe I'm jaded. But what happened to good conversation? It used to be that a person could have a good talk, get comfortable and enjoy each other. Now it's just grunts. "Clothes off. Penis in vagina. Ug ug ohh gug " This is the main reason I'm so tired of the meet and greet thing. There's no let me put you at ease. Let's conversate. See if there is a mental stimulation between us. Stroke my mind like you would<b> stroke </font></b>my body.

nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/14/2020 9:32 pm

Can we talk?


agedfun1 73M
641 posts
7/14/2020 10:28 pm

Shouldn't that be may we talk? We can always open our mouths and chatter but conversing is something we may do if we want to know about each other.

Equal opportunity chatter here. All topics fair game from A to Z. Private mailbox blog agedfun1.


jajo696 65F
2360 posts
7/14/2020 11:02 pm

Yup.....they just need a vessel for the appendage. They have bought the ' sex site ' hype.......and wanna hit it and quit it. They dont care abt conversation , they dont care abt putting anyone at ease.....they dont care abt emotions or connecting. Thats why there is a diff between having sex and making love. Many just need the slam bam thankyou and out the door. Its all abt the vessel. You need to decide if you want to be objectified as this ...or not . I think here is a place for many types of need......just hang in there ...decide and find those which match your need. Good luck ~~


Dark_Star1972 48M
721 posts
7/14/2020 11:16 pm

A'FF isn't what it used to be when I first joined the site. Hell, even then it wasn't always that great. I rarely do anything but come here to blog and read a few blogs that have actual words on them.

I've never been to a meetup in my area and now with COVID-19, it would likely turn into a hot mess. Good conversation has to be here online and A'FF's messenger system is broken, at best, and non-functional at its worst.

And don't get me started on the elitism of the site's mail system.

The Darkstar

The Bearded One: Dark_Star1972
_______________________________


kzoopair 69M/67F
25805 posts
7/14/2020 11:46 pm

I know exactly what you mean. Just before meeting my wife I was trying to engage with other women and I thought I was looking for no strings- or limited strings- attached. But it began to dawn on e that what I really wanted was someone I could talk to. I don't like to refer to the sex as secondary, but it kind of is in that if you find someone you connect with, the sex is most likely gonna be good. Satisfying. And when you love someone it can appear perfunctory when described to someone outside the relationship but it's far from perfunctory or boring when you care deeply for your partner. Every day it feels as if I found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

Become a member now and get a free tote bag.


wingnuts56 64M/63F  
30 posts
7/15/2020 12:03 am

the art of conversation has died but there are still a few of us left that enjoy it and know how hmmmmm a free tote bag im thinking.


lindoboy100 57M
22130 posts
7/15/2020 2:58 am

Ah, ye cannae beat a guid auld blether McNerd. It's how we get to know each other........

I have to confess that I very quickly lose interest in a girl if the conversation isn't engaging. Physical gratification on its own isn't enough. Hey, I must be getting older and grumpier!

Pull ma finger.........


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 4:34 am

    Quoting agedfun1:
    Shouldn't that be may we talk? We can always open our mouths and chatter but conversing is something we may do if we want to know about each other.
True. Thanks for the correction. In elementary school, can and may was such a big thing. Quite a few times, I've been hit with " I don't know, can you?" Lol Forgetting it's may I.


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 4:46 am

    Quoting jajo696:
    Yup.....they just need a vessel for the appendage. They have bought the ' sex site ' hype.......and wanna hit it and quit it. They dont care abt conversation , they dont care abt putting anyone at ease.....they dont care abt emotions or connecting. Thats why there is a diff between having sex and making love. Many just need the slam bam thankyou and out the door. Its all abt the vessel. You need to decide if you want to be objectified as this ...or not . I think here is a place for many types of need......just hang in there ...decide and find those which match your need. Good luck ~~
I hear you. But it didn't always be like that. I met my best friend on here, plus many other good friends where the conversation was great. I'm not looking for love. But the first step to really great sex is mental stimulation, at least for me. Maybe you're right and the era of conversation is dead.


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 4:53 am

    Quoting Dark_Star1972:
    A'FF isn't what it used to be when I first joined the site. Hell, even then it wasn't always that great. I rarely do anything but come here to blog and read a few blogs that have actual words on them.

    I've never been to a meetup in my area and now with COVID-19, it would likely turn into a hot mess. Good conversation has to be here online and A'FF's messenger system is broken, at best, and non-functional at its worst.

    And don't get me started on the elitism of the site's mail system.
Definitely not the same. Sigh. With Covid 19, it's like I need more social connection while maintaining social distance. Similarly I love the blogs. But the meet and greet scene has totally flopped. The messenger system haven't failed me yet. Fingers crossed


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 4:57 am

    Quoting kzoopair:
    I know exactly what you mean. Just before meeting my wife I was trying to engage with other women and I thought I was looking for no strings- or limited strings- attached. But it began to dawn on e that what I really wanted was someone I could talk to. I don't like to refer to the sex as secondary, but it kind of is in that if you find someone you connect with, the sex is most likely gonna be good. Satisfying. And when you love someone it can appear perfunctory when described to someone outside the relationship but it's far from perfunctory or boring when you care deeply for your partner. Every day it feels as if I found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
I'm happy you can experience that with your wife. I agree with you. While I'm not looking for love, a fulfilling sexual relationship does need more than a brain dead participant.


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 4:59 am

    Quoting wingnuts56:
    the art of conversation has died but there are still a few of us left that enjoy it and know how hmmmmm a free tote bag im thinking.
I'm glad to hear that. Now I just need to go out and find them. Free tote bag!?! Love it


WyoCowboy7751 67M
715 posts
7/15/2020 5:32 am

In some respects ; The days of face too face verbal conversation is DYING !!! More so with the current state of affairs !! I've seen couples sitting at a table ; young and old alike ; with phones held in front of them and appear to be TEXTING too each other !!! I guess that may be okay if it is a conversation that you don't care to be overheard !!!


dogslife2live01 68M
2058 posts
7/15/2020 5:35 am

nope i do not think you are jaded... just wrong. that is exactly the reason for coffee dates. for you to discover if you are with your next lover or just another prick. now i understand in this instant world that anything over ninety seconds seems like a lifetime...but sometimes you just have to drink a gigabyte of coffee before you find it.

there is a world of difference between insanity and stupidity


dogslife2live01 68M
2058 posts
7/15/2020 5:47 am

    Quoting jajo696:
    Yup.....they just need a vessel for the appendage. They have bought the ' sex site ' hype.......and wanna hit it and quit it. They dont care abt conversation , they dont care abt putting anyone at ease.....they dont care abt emotions or connecting. Thats why there is a diff between having sex and making love. Many just need the slam bam thankyou and out the door. Its all abt the vessel. You need to decide if you want to be objectified as this ...or not . I think here is a place for many types of need......just hang in there ...decide and find those which match your need. Good luck ~~
99.999% have bought the hype the rest are crusaders marching with their purest thoughts before them, with the intent of converting the lost to the light.
but
butt
as you sit across his lust what is on your mind... is it his fire you seek to quench. or is it the burning between your legs you need pounded out.
truth be told a male in need only cums in a woman in heat, or the one night stand would be but a myth.


there is a world of difference between insanity and stupidity


positively4you 71F  
4021 posts
7/15/2020 5:54 am

That situation is a hooker experience. Do it, pay her and go. So many here just don’t get it. The way to a woman’s bed is engaging her like she matters. Even if it is not love, as long as she feels admired. Before internet, the old fashion way was how it was done.


papis_baby_girl 41F
5343 posts
7/15/2020 8:49 am

conversation is a string in a no strings environment.

"The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say."
-Anais Nin

"I am big, it's the pictures that got small!"
-Norma Desmond


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 9:57 am

    Quoting positively4you:
    That situation is a hooker experience. Do it, pay her and go. So many here just don’t get it. The way to a woman’s bed is engaging her like she matters. Even if it is not love, as long as she feels admired. Before internet, the old fashion way was how it was done.
Exactly. You hit it right on the head. Majority just want a hooker without paying. Now personally I have nothing against sex workers. As long as you're safe I see no problem with it. But I'm not a hooker. Is it so hard to find engaging conversation, as well as a sexual experience?


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 10:00 am

    Quoting lindoboy100:
    Ah, ye cannae beat a guid auld blether McNerd. It's how we get to know each other........

    I have to confess that I very quickly lose interest in a girl if the conversation isn't engaging. Physical gratification on its own isn't enough. Hey, I must be getting older and grumpier!
Lol I feel the same way. It's the conversation that makes me want to meet. The "show me your titties' guys are just a bore. Articulation is key. Without convo might as well stay home and play with my toy.


nerdygirl721 31F  
1159 posts
7/15/2020 10:04 am

    Quoting WyoCowboy7751:
    In some respects ; The days of face too face verbal conversation is DYING !!! More so with the current state of affairs !! I've seen couples sitting at a table ; young and old alike ; with phones held in front of them and appear to be TEXTING too each other !!! I guess that may be okay if it is a conversation that you don't care to be overheard !!!
So true. Face to face and other forms. Half the time it just one word. Other times misspelling, bad grammer and the like. I can get the texting but make it clear what you mean.


jajo696 65F
2360 posts
7/15/2020 10:44 am

    Quoting nerdygirl721:
    I hear you. But it didn't always be like that. I met my best friend on here, plus many other good friends where the conversation was great. I'm not looking for love. But the first step to really great sex is mental stimulation, at least for me. Maybe you're right and the era of conversation is dead.
No....i dont think the era of conversation is dead....i think you just have to wait it out and be selective on those you wish to be with. There is something here for everyone. Like you said....you have found good people here...i have too. So dont give up hope~~


jajo696 65F
2360 posts
7/15/2020 10:46 am

    Quoting kzoopair:
    I know exactly what you mean. Just before meeting my wife I was trying to engage with other women and I thought I was looking for no strings- or limited strings- attached. But it began to dawn on e that what I really wanted was someone I could talk to. I don't like to refer to the sex as secondary, but it kind of is in that if you find someone you connect with, the sex is most likely gonna be good. Satisfying. And when you love someone it can appear perfunctory when described to someone outside the relationship but it's far from perfunctory or boring when you care deeply for your partner. Every day it feels as if I found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Well said....i couldnt agree more. Sounds like you are lucky...you both are. Kudos!


jajo696 65F
2360 posts
7/15/2020 10:53 am

    Quoting dogslife2live01:
    99.999% have bought the hype the rest are crusaders marching with their purest thoughts before them, with the intent of converting the lost to the light.
    but
    butt
    as you sit across his lust what is on your mind... is it his fire you seek to quench. or is it the burning between your legs you need pounded out.
    truth be told a male in need only cums in a woman in heat, or the one night stand would be but a myth.

Those males in need need to locate those women in heat . Sounds like a perfect match. The others who are more discerning will wait. The original poster sounds like she could, if she wanted to, get her heat quenched.....she is asking for a bit more...

......and that pounding stuff.. nah....i ll pass~~


givespleasure222 62M  
8 posts
7/15/2020 4:40 pm

People both young and old don't seem to realize how far a conversation or should I say.. conversations will get you. Many times a supposedly conversation is one sided and the other person has no clue as to what is being said to them. I'm a person that even in a sexual friendship love to hear what a person has to say.. gives me much more insight as to what they enjoy and are looking for. Foreplay begins in the conversation.


dogslife2live01 68M
2058 posts
7/16/2020 12:34 am

    Quoting jajo696:
    Those males in need need to locate those women in heat . Sounds like a perfect match. The others who are more discerning will wait. The original poster sounds like she could, if she wanted to, get her heat quenched.....she is asking for a bit more...

    ......and that pounding stuff.. nah....i ll pass~~
and i agree with the OP, and i have answered her so...but finding love and finding sex are two different restaurants.
just as i would not go to McDonnald's for a fine stake, i would not go to AdultFriendFinder for true love.
As i myself lean more to love rather than i quick fuck... i tend to stick to the forums. i do enjoy the chatter
bonne chance

there is a world of difference between insanity and stupidity


trainman428 50M  
2 posts
7/16/2020 3:32 am

You have one of the best blogs on here. Keep up the good work.
I struggle often with this site and what is on here. I guess in the end I'm kind of looking for someone to talk to - even if it's only to say I had a crappy day, or that I'm in a good mood. I think the whole mindset of 'instant gratification' has definitely set in on here. I try to steer my kids away from that, but have to be careful not to get caught up in it myself.

I'm considered essential (railroad job - hence the screen name - have to keep explaining that it has no sexual connotation - LO. At work we have had to deal with corona head on. I was out 2 weeks in May with it - was never too sick, but other were not so fortunate.

Anyways, seems like I'm just rambling - see I needed to talk after all.
Take care.


rm_TayandJoe 39M/34F  
1 post
7/23/2020 9:11 pm

We agree we would rather sit and converse first maybe have a drink or two to lighten the mood and get to know each other


proteus_2a 54M
7929 posts
8/2/2020 6:12 am

It is the ubiquitous "...what'cha doin now ? " syndrom
Probably having to do with a certain atrophy on the muscles,
hence the one handed typing on the keyboard ...

And you know my lady, that symptom creeps into real life ...

Keep the lost art of eloquence alive, and ...

Cheers - P


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