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Ugh bullies  

nerdygirl721 30F  
1919 posts
1/14/2020 1:33 pm
Ugh bullies


Lately I've been dealing with this bully at my job. And today I've finally got vindicated.

There was a girl at my job that I brought into my circle because I wanted to be nice. I befriended her, encouraged her and genuinely tried to boost her self esteem. Before Christmas break everyone in our work group found out that a guy she had been obsessive about liked me. I took 2 weeks off to be with my during the holidays. I come back to so much drama. At my job, alot of people think I'm gay. Which is not a problem, cause I cultivate that perception. I definitely don't date at my job. So first day back, everyone is coming up to me with these rumors she spreading. I speak to her about it, like please keep my name out your mouth. She said ok and I thought it was the end of it. But no. Next I'm getting screenshots of several posts she made about me. I argue with her on the post. Pleading take them down. She said alot of awful things about me and my . She filed false police reports about saying I beat her up. Said she was going to destory my life. And she tried it.

This Monday, I went to the very top. Showed documented proof of her slut shaming me, gay bashing me, filing false police reports. Monday she got fired. Today, went to the police station with written statements from every person who was outside. To prove my innocence. Just got the call that she was arrested for filing false reports.

She wanted to destory my life, but destoryed hers. Posting this here cause I need to vent. I need to get this off my chest. I feel sorry for her. I feel guilty that it came to this. She had hatred for me when I only offered friendship. But I still feel guilty

blademaster70 49M
209 posts
1/14/2020 1:43 pm

Never feel guilty, you did everything you could before she forced you to take legal measures. She had an opportunity to leave you in peace and go on with her life. Unfortunately, for her, she continued. You reap what you sow, and she sowed her ass right out of a job. I call that karma. She's in the past now, keep going forward and live your best life


ULIXBIG 65M
6704 posts
1/14/2020 1:56 pm

Standing up to bullies is the only way to deal with them! Well done!


Mr00Fun4U 60M  
701 posts
1/14/2020 2:15 pm

Glad that you were stronger than her and took her head on. She was never going to just go away...you asked her politely to take things down and she just threatened you to make your life miserable. You are a good person and it's not in your nature to try and hurt someone...that is why you feel upset. You did what had to be done.

Ugh bullies


lLbow2459 60M
109 posts
1/14/2020 2:29 pm

GREAT to see that kind of ending! One thing I cant stand is a GD bully.


dogslife2live01 67M
1720 posts
1/14/2020 3:47 pm

and that is what abusers rely on! you feeling guilty for defending yourself!
i say get over your guilt. you did the right thing.


there is a world of difference between insanity and stupidity


sexyceltic000069 44F  
36 posts
1/14/2020 4:17 pm

With people like that, I say...screw guilt!

After having to endure what she did to you, I would be filing for slander/libel! People need to understand that there are consequences for their actions. They always have the choice but not all choose the right one!

To you, I say, KUDOS!!!


Riverside84u 43M  
35 posts
1/14/2020 4:32 pm

Glad you were brave enough to share and to take back control of your world. This is actually somewhat inspiring. Don’t loss who you are! Ugh bullies


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 5:45 pm

    Quoting blademaster70:
    Never feel guilty, you did everything you could before she forced you to take legal measures. She had an opportunity to leave you in peace and go on with her life. Unfortunately, for her, she continued. You reap what you sow, and she sowed her ass right out of a job. I call that karma. She's in the past now, keep going forward and live your best life
Thanks for the kind words. Just trying to process this. Tomorrow is a new day and until her court date I won't be thinking about it anymore.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 5:48 pm

    Quoting ULIXBIG:
    Standing up to bullies is the only way to deal with them! Well done!
Thank you. I can't stand a bully. I always try to give chances. But the false police reports were going too far. I'm just glad this is over.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 5:51 pm

    Quoting Mr00Fun4U:
    Glad that you were stronger than her and took her head on. She was never going to just go away...you asked her politely to take things down and she just threatened you to make your life miserable. You are a good person and it's not in your nature to try and hurt someone...that is why you feel upset. You did what had to be done.

    Ugh bullies
That's what I keep telling myself. I did what had to be done. Sometimes I feel like I'm too soft, too nice and too sensitive.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 5:54 pm

    Quoting lLbow2459:
    GREAT to see that kind of ending! One thing I cant stand is a GD bully.
I don't tolerate bully. This whole thing just sadden me. The best type of ending would be her just leaving me alone. The only great thing that I can agree to was me not going to jail for another person's lies.


jolielaide 48F  
1119 posts
1/14/2020 5:58 pm

don't feel guilty about your own self-preservation. she was looking to 'kill' you. and you kept your wits about you. you think david was worried that he slayed goliath? the village knew not to fuck with david after that. and just like him, you showed everyone that you know how to slay. sometimes you gotta show people that you're not one to be fucked with, unless you say so.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 5:59 pm

    Quoting sexyceltic000069:
    With people like that, I say...screw guilt!

    After having to endure what she did to you, I would be filing for slander/libel! People need to understand that there are consequences for their actions. They always have the choice but not all choose the right one!

    To you, I say, KUDOS!!!
"Screw guilt." You're absolutely right. But suing her will end up costing me more. I won't get anything. Her consequences were the loss of her job and jail time. I hope and pray that it taught her something and she won't ever do this to another person.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 6:04 pm

    Quoting Riverside84u:
    Glad you were brave enough to share and to take back control of your world. This is actually somewhat inspiring. Don’t loss who you are! Ugh bullies
I can only be me. I hope it would inspire people to speak up against bullying especially against the LGBT community. It makes you feel so small and helpless.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 6:11 pm

    Quoting jolielaide:
    don't feel guilty about your own self-preservation. she was looking to 'kill' you. and you kept your wits about you. you think david was worried that he slayed goliath? the village knew not to fuck with david after that. and just like him, you showed everyone that you know how to slay. sometimes you gotta show people that you're not one to be fucked with, unless you say so.
Logically, I understand that. Emotionally? It still eats at me. I hate confrontations. I deplore hurting someone even if it's in self-defense. You're right though, sometimes you gotta show them when they push it too far.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/14/2020 6:16 pm

Thank you everyone for letting me vent about this. Thank you for the encouraging words and the show of support. Tomorrow is a new day, I'll try to let go of misplaced guilt and move forward.


RyuFujin 52F  
994 posts
1/14/2020 7:46 pm

Hmm, sounds like a case of she had the hots for this guy, approached him about it, and since he likes you instead, he turned her down. Maybe right around the break time. Sounds like she has an uncontrollable jealous nature, mixed in with some unaddressed insecurities. Which can equate an emotional unstable, if not volatile nature in anyone. If that's the case it would be a good thing for her to seek counselling. Though that's just my take on that there.

You did the right thing with reporting the incident to all authorities. I feel for you; I don't like conflicts myself, and do my best to avoid them, or at least try to reach a middle ground where everyone's happy. But when it comes to my life or the lives of whom I'm close to and/or protect are involved? Oh no, hunny-- NOT going to happen! Flip that switch, and you'll see Insta-Bitch real fast.

::le sigh:: On that note...
Hang in there. Sometimes it sucks being an Empath...


"Be who you are and say what you feel. Those who matter don't mind, and those who mind don't matter." ~Dr. Seuss
My private postbox: [post 4233663]


Tbadboytoy69 60M
133 posts
1/14/2020 10:06 pm

Keep strong. Don’t ever let a bully know they won. They need an ego stroke.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/15/2020 5:03 am

    Quoting RyuFujin:
    Hmm, sounds like a case of she had the hots for this guy, approached him about it, and since he likes you instead, he turned her down. Maybe right around the break time. Sounds like she has an uncontrollable jealous nature, mixed in with some unaddressed insecurities. Which can equate an emotional unstable, if not volatile nature in anyone. If that's the case it would be a good thing for her to seek counselling. Though that's just my take on that there.

    You did the right thing with reporting the incident to all authorities. I feel for you; I don't like conflicts myself, and do my best to avoid them, or at least try to reach a middle ground where everyone's happy. But when it comes to my life or the lives of whom I'm close to and/or protect are involved? Oh no, hunny-- NOT going to happen! Flip that switch, and you'll see Insta-Bitch real fast.

    ::le sigh:: On that note...
    Hang in there. Sometimes it sucks being an Empath...
I know. And it does suck being an empath. I get so overwhelmed with it sometimes. That kind of why I took yesterday off, to regroup, vent and center myself. But today is a new day. Now to get to the office and deal with the aftermath.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/15/2020 5:06 am

    Quoting Tbadboytoy69:
    Keep strong. Don’t ever let a bully know they won. They need an ego stroke.
Thanks. I won't give them the satisfaction or the ego stroke.


author51 57F  
86952 posts
1/15/2020 5:09 am

So sorry to hear it happened in your real life and happy to hear you took it to the top along with the documented proof of it.. Good for you for standing up and calling her out.. Unfortunately on this site, it happens a lot here with women who are either jealous or do not like you, without knowing you personally..I document everything so if I have to take it higher,I have the truth to back me up.. I hope it does not happen to you here..Bravo to you...xx

One can never have enough JOY in their life...


zipanotti 52M  
195 posts
1/15/2020 8:02 am

Going forward you might also want to see about a restraining order to keep her away from you.


kzoopair 68M/66F  
25688 posts
1/15/2020 1:05 pm

How awful for you! I'm really sorry that happened to you. I think you did the right thing without question and you sure as hell have nothing to feel guilty about. Just today I re-read a story by a favorite writer of mine. The quote I remember most vividly is "When planning revenge, first dig two graves." I'll hasten to say it doesn't apply to you- you simply defended yourself. But it certainly applies to your co-worker! Her pettiness and jealousy came back to bite her. Keep your head held high. I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself!

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WombWrecka 53M
6 posts
1/16/2020 4:06 pm

Keep it moving always forward.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/17/2020 4:21 am

    Quoting author51:
    So sorry to hear it happened in your real life and happy to hear you took it to the top along with the documented proof of it.. Good for you for standing up and calling her out.. Unfortunately on this site, it happens a lot here with women who are either jealous or do not like you, without knowing you personally..I document everything so if I have to take it higher,I have the truth to back me up.. I hope it does not happen to you here..Bravo to you...xx
I've noticed a little of it on here. But for me AdultFriendFinder has been a safe place to be myself, a sexual deviant. Sorry that it's not a safe place for you. No one deserve to be bullied.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/17/2020 4:25 am

    Quoting zipanotti:
    Going forward you might also want to see about a restraining order to keep her away from you.
I can always count on you to brighten up my day with your gorgeous pictures. I've thought about getting a restraining order, but that won't work against her slanderous comments. She won't approach me. This whole issue just saddens me.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/17/2020 4:30 am

    Quoting kzoopair:
    How awful for you! I'm really sorry that happened to you. I think you did the right thing without question and you sure as hell have nothing to feel guilty about. Just today I re-read a story by a favorite writer of mine. The quote I remember most vividly is "When planning revenge, first dig two graves." I'll hasten to say it doesn't apply to you- you simply defended yourself. But it certainly applies to your co-worker! Her pettiness and jealousy came back to bite her. Keep your head held high. I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself!
It's funny, because I told her something similar. The grave you dig for me, will be the perfect size for you. Thank you. Between you and everyone else supporting me, I don't feel guilty anymore. Trying to keep my head high and a smile on.


nerdygirl721 30F  
1138 posts
1/17/2020 4:31 am

I'm trying.


samson19682006 51M  
1275 posts
1/19/2020 6:06 am

Good for you for standing up for yourself.


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