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What the fatherfuckin hell...?  

partygald 37F
2537 posts
10/29/2019 4:39 am

Last Read:
3/21/2020 6:52 pm

What the fatherfuckin hell...?


Why is it the term "fatherfucker" isn't used as much, and doesn't carry as much weight as "motherfucker"? Somehow one seems a lot more callous than the other. Hmm...

Ok. I should get round to finishing this. It's been a long day. Theres a slight reprieve cos I had to cancel a conference call, but the downside to that is the reason it got cancelled in the first place - the wifi here is sketchy. As a result, I've had to come out to a cafe to do my work. It's not so bad, considering, the food here is pretty good and the coffee is decent. But a whole fucking day here and I'm about done. Also, I've about hd it up to my nose with bad pick up lines. Who knew I'd get hit on more here than in a bar. LOL

It's been a fairly rough couple of weeks. I took one afternoon off to help a friend pack cos his visa was up and he had to leave. Not sure if he'll be back but, more on that another time. There were a few other people there helping him out as well, and most of them were acquaintances. There was this one older guy (late 60s, I later found out). I've always figured him for a "juicer" (and I was right, by the way) cos he was a buff. Like too buff for someone his age. Anyhow, I see him at the gym often and I found out that he was scheduled to leave the country as well. I've never spoken to him at length in the past but did while we were all helping out. Turns out he was a pretty nice guy. We had a good time that day and I left it at that. Fast forward a few days tot he weekend and I was walking back from the beach. (I've been hanging out at the beach quite often of late. Why move here if I'm not gonna enjoy the beach, right? ). It was early evening by then, and i pass a pub on my way back to my bike. I hear someone calling my name. I turn and see this muscle head waving and walking towards me. Turns out its the same guy from a few days ago. Now right before I left the beach, I had a heated text discussion with the husband, then boyfriend. Then heated text discussion became heated sex text discussions, then heated discussions arguing again. So I was all riled up. We started talking and he asked if I wanted to share a few drinks. I declined enough to make it seem like when I said yes, he felt like he was successful In truth, I kinda needed a drink too. Maybe a few.

"A drink" ended up with dinner (pub food, how sexy ) and a bit too much drink than even I anticipated. But I was in a mood so I asked him to accompany me to club cos I felt like dancing. Bear in mind we were both not dressed for clubbing. And he literally admitted to being too old for it. But I kinda knew at that point he was gonna follow me anywhere so we went. We found one a few doors down that let us in (I think cos it was still early and the place was pretty much empty LOL ). He ended up sitting by the bar looking super awkward (which admittedly, I found kinda cute ) and me just dancing by myself. I saw a few younger guys come in and were already inching closer, so I danced my way closer to the old muscle head. Didn't take long before he was leaning into the bar and I was grinding my ass against his crotch. I suggested we leave, but I couldn't even walk straight so he took my bike and gave me a ride back.

This is where it literally became comical. Painfully comical. On the way back, I was already fiddling around his crotch on the bike. He kept laughing and pushing my hands away. We got back, and I suggested he come up. He replied he really wanted to, but we needed to go back to his place first. I literally went, WTF?? He then admitted he needed a certain miracle blue pill. He really, really wanted to do without, but knew he can't and needed it go get going. Ok. We were outside my place, but without even getting off the bike, we rode back to his place. Once there, I figured we'd go in, right? But no. He insisted I wait there while he ran up, grabbed what he needed to, and ran back down. Took us about 45mins before we were back at my place, but this time, all that buzz (both from the alcohol AND the lead up) was gone. But I thought, I really needed to get laid. So i said fuck it (literally) and we went in. I got him in the shower with me and maybe it was the hot water, but everything came out. He confessed to not having sex for years (which is understandable, tbh), and that he always wanted to, but had never had sex with an asian girl before. The only thought that came to mind, at the time, was "umm...ok. So what do I do with this info...? ). Needless to say, he was a tad....ok. No. He was pretty damn clumsy. He tried to eat me out but it didn't go well (I had to stop him). He also did this clawing thing to my breasts, which I can't fucking stand, so I stopped him there too But we got going eventually. That blue pill though I HAVE to write to Pfitzer (I think I got the spelling wrong...) to thank them for that. At least. Overall, the sex was okay. Wasn't bad...but....let's just say I've made arrangements for the boyfriend to come in earlier . He DID surprise me by kissing me after he came in my mouth. Heh. People may surprise you.

But anyhow, that was that. A few days later I get a call from the friend who I was helping pack. I pick up the phone to him screaming at me. Turns out, the muscle head was his dad! . In my defence, how the fuck was I to know? It didn't seem like it when they were there together. He wasn't mad that his dad got laid, or I got laid, but it made it weird for him. Which is fair enough too. LOL. I mean, for fuck's sake. sigh. Now I'm glad they're both leaving. Why didn't I put two and two together? Ah well.. another one for faux-fucking-pas

Maybe I should compile a faux pas list. Good gawd....that would be a long one. LOL
That's it for now. Til the next one

partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 4:40 am

Whoops. Thanks for reading.
Hope you're having a better time at it


EnigmaInitiative 52F  
3171 posts
10/29/2019 4:56 am

    Quoting partygald:
    Whoops. Thanks for reading.
    Hope you're having a better time at it
My faux pas list would be just as long.

Bwahahahahaha

I loved your story, thank you for sharing!

In a sense, sexuality is the built-in psychedelic experience that only a very few people manage to evade.

~Terence McKenna


tantallblue4u 55M
262 posts
10/29/2019 7:13 am

Lucky guy. Love to be with you in that situation.


Mr00Fun4U 61M  
934 posts
10/29/2019 7:23 am

Oh my what a nice family story?!?? Also not all your fault because I question your friend’s dad. He had to know that he was also interested in you. Ah well maybe he is more clumsy in everything he does?’b

Thanks for your story....and as Vanilla Ice might say, You Wo-man, let’s get out of here. Word to your Father...Fucker

What the fatherfuckin hell


japaneseass 52F  
49481 posts
10/29/2019 7:57 am

oh my gawd...that was funny!!!! i guess you stole the family jewel!!! now you are officially the fatherfucker!!!!


unknown170 41M
44 posts
10/29/2019 9:58 am

Did you have a history with the son i wonder


Wonder167 53F

10/29/2019 10:20 am

Live and learn, at least it wasn't a complete failure.


looking4u69ca 59M
4146 posts
10/29/2019 10:54 am

Great read. I think the guy should carry a pill with him.


Looknfind18 67M  
4238 posts
10/29/2019 3:57 pm

glad things got going for you, always love your adventures.


MyBaffies 50M
4310 posts
10/29/2019 4:17 pm

How did the son find out? Did the dad get home and call his son: "Guess who I've just been with?" Or did the son find one of his blue pills missing?

Baffies

My Blog: MyBaffies


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:05 pm

    Quoting EnigmaInitiative:
    My faux pas list would be just as long.

    Bwahahahahaha

    I loved your story, thank you for sharing!
Haha! Thanks for stopping by.
xx


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:06 pm

    Quoting tantallblue4u:
    Lucky guy. Love to be with you in that situation.


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:08 pm

    Quoting Mr00Fun4U:
    Oh my what a nice family story?!?? Also not all your fault because I question your friend’s dad. He had to know that he was also interested in you. Ah well maybe he is more clumsy in everything he does?’b

    Thanks for your story....and as Vanilla Ice might say, You Wo-man, let’s get out of here. Word to your Father...Fucker

    What the fatherfuckin hell
I am...not familiar with that Vanilla Ice quote. Actually, I haven't heard that name in eons! Bravo to you 90s reference winner for the week! Hahaha
thanks for stopping by


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:09 pm

    Quoting japaneseass:
    oh my gawd...that was funny!!!! i guess you stole the family jewel!!! now you are officially the fatherfucker!!!!

I guess so. I better not hear it though.... LOL


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:10 pm

    Quoting Wonder167:
    Live and learn, at least it wasn't a complete failure.
Heheh...yup


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:10 pm

    Quoting Looknfind18:
    glad things got going for you, always love your adventures.
Thanks for stopping by


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:11 pm

    Quoting unknown170:
    Did you have a history with the son i wonder
Fortunately, not. But he is...wait. Was...? A close friend for awhile


partygald 37F
1791 posts
10/29/2019 7:12 pm

    Quoting MyBaffies:
    How did the son find out? Did the dad get home and call his son: "Guess who I've just been with?" Or did the son find one of his blue pills missing?
LOL
I'm not sure, and I don't think I'll wanna find out


ClitLickB4DickU 61M
1203 posts
10/30/2019 6:28 pm

Fucking Hilarious.........Literally

I'm still struggling with the "Never Fucked an Asian Girl" statement. In my experience, they work MUCH better than any pharmaceutical

Remind me to call on you if I need help in moving


scoupe42 57M  
8817 posts
11/1/2019 2:18 am

Interesting! Thx for sharing with us.


maneo69 65M
878 posts
11/16/2019 10:38 pm

You really are so hot.
Thanks for the story.


discreteSteve62 52M
2076 posts
3/21/2020 2:49 am

That does sound a bit weird. And the age difference sets me to fantasizing that, in the event that I'm ever in Singapore again, we might get together.

I don't need pharmaceutical assistance, but unless there's a plan I might not have condoms with me. (And I'm told I'm excellent at giving oral.)


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