i am an unabashed prude...looking for sex.
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Posted:Jun 22, 2020 10:13 pm
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2024 7:17 am
1583 Views
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i know, i know, i'm on this site, for fucks sakes'.
but i don't like random nudity. i really don't. in movies (the regular movies) i don't like to see people going at it. i might like a sweet romantic kiss and then seeing them wake up in the morning together and we can infer what happened. but i'm not into seeing a hot n' heavy scene. no thank you.
i used to be like the stereotypical girl in a horror film with her bf, averting or closing my eyes and asking my companion to tell me when the sexy sex scenes (rather than the scary scenes) were over. they would laugh. i was serious.
i'm still like this and usually i listen for the heavy breathing to be over before i look at the screen again.
and nudity? random nudity? omg. do. not. get. me. started.
i hate it when movies and tv shows don't prepare you for what's coming so i can turn away. like damn, give a girl some warning. game of thrones was difficult. like really difficult. sigh.
is it any surprise that i've not watched a porn movie? ever? and from what i've heard, i don't intend to.
i can't say i've never seen porn b/c i'm on this fucking site and i can't seem to get away from it. i appreciate the filter thingy here where i can block most of the random nudity. thank goodness.
but i really don't like it.
the funny thing is, i love sex. and i love my lover naked. i'm totally ok with that. that is totally sexy and hot and fun. his nudity gives me access. but random nudity? of strangers or randos or people i am not intimate with? (and i'm strictly mono so i'm not intimate with the vast majority of people. like just about all the people on the planet, really.) no thank you. oddly, i was rather uninhibited with sex with my last partner. he seemed to love it and i loved it and i don't think he would ever accuse me of being a prude.
on this site...well i talked about how i handle it earlier, right? this place should be enough aversion therapy for me. it's a strategy but it's not working for me. cause i like the damn sex so much. sigh.
so yeah, i'm a pervert. and sexually adventurous with my partner if i'm allowed to be. and a prude. i'm ok with it. but you might think it's weird. not surprising. aren't we all a wee bit weird?
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Indulging in kinks & fetishes....
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Posted:Feb 18, 2017 9:45 pm
Last Updated:Feb 22, 2017 5:18 pm
3136 Views
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so while i am a bit shy in the bedroom, it does not mean that i am not open minded to my previous lovers' preferences. as long as i didn't find it disgusting (sorry, bodily function and blood play is always going to disgust me), i would be open to fulfilling a desire or quirk that they wanted to try.
this has included things like foot fetishists (which is quite common actually - i've had 3 exes who liked foot play of some kind). one liked me to wear what he called "bedroom heels" in bed - during foreplay and sex. a couple liked me to lay my shoe gently (and not so gently) on their cock or balls and be a little dominant. one wanted me to kick his balls while wearing my boots (which i couldn't really do - it worried me about the damage i could have inflicted). one liked to lick and suck my toes (although i insisted he wash them first - i was going to be kissing his mouth, after all). it was an interesting experience but i wouldn't say they "converted" me in any way.
i've also played with a couple of exes who were interested in the D/s dynamic (Dominant/submissive) where they wanted me to be strict, to inflict a bit of pain in some way and to exert control over elements of the relationship, particularly in the bedroom. to be honest, i never saw myself as a Domme or Mistress who would spank a man or bark orders. that's just not my style. but i have been able to tap into a dominant personality and play a bit with that dynamic. i'm never going to be a sadist and i'm not looking for a masochist. but a little bondage and light flogging can be fun (i have found...) but again, it's not to the level of fetish for me where i need it to enjoy sex.
so what kinds of kinks have you indulged in a partner? what did you learn about yourself? did you learn you liked things you never imagined you would?
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authors i'd like to fuck...
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Posted:Feb 11, 2017 11:52 pm
Last Updated:Feb 13, 2017 11:13 pm
3370 Views
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i am borrowing this idea from another blogger from another site - she inspired me with her list and i thought i'd come up with my own. you are welcome to add your own to the list...this is all assuming that they were alive, clean of all diseases and would actually want to fuck me, so please bear that in mind
oscar wilde: i want to spend about a week with him eating, drinking, fucking and talking. i'm sure we'd be laughing in bed for hours.
dickens: despite his puritanical leanings, i think he'd be totally kinky in bed given half the chance. maybe a weekend in bed is all we could handle before his christian guilt would leave him impotent.
leonard cohen: in his younger days. i'm sure he'd make bittersweet, melancholy, love to me and eventually make me want to commit suicide after we inevitably break up.
nick hornby: oh let me rub that bald head and play vinyl for a month. then he'd probably write an anguished monologue about how it all went wrong and we were doomed from the start.
margaret atwood: i think she'd be one kinky funny bitch. maybe just the once. or twice. and i wanna be on her squad. but she's probably too cool to have one...
truman capote: definitely would be kinky in bed. and dark. just the way i like 'em. but his voice would eventually grate. couldn't be more than a handful of times i think.
walt whitman/w.h.auden threesome: they'd read me their poetry than fuck me three ways from sunday. couldn't happen more than once
oh, i'm sure there's more but i think i'm going to leave it there. who's on your list?
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can a hetero man compliment another hetero man?
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Posted:Feb 9, 2017 8:36 am
Last Updated:Feb 13, 2017 11:13 pm
3245 Views
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i know many women who compliment their husbands (and did well before they were married) and lots of females who do a lot of ego stroking (with compliments and such) with men (friends and lovers alike). i think the male ego is far more fragile than we sometimes think (understandably so - we all have our moments and none of us want to be thought of as unattractive or not worthy of a compliment).
and i always carefully consider the compliments i give - i give them often (to both genders) but they have to be things i really believe and have a rationale as to why. sometimes it's on a physical characteristic: smiles and eyes are big for me and hands on a man....but also the way a person dresses as well. however, most of my compliments are generally the kinds that relate to the kind of mind they have or the way they might articulate a thought or a different point of view to my own. or kindness and good manners.
but you don't hear a lot of men tell other men that they are physically attractive or a compliment in that realm. it's more about a job well done or some athletic prowess or something that i guess men feel is "appropriate" (i'm speaking of the hetero men i know). that being said, i know a lot of men who will tell me about another man's body, or pecs or abs, etc. with envy which i think i is complimentary but they would never tell the man in question that. men notice but i don't think they are allowed (or feel they are) allowed to say.
i suspect it's a male culture thing that you just grow up knowing or learning. can a man ever compliment another man on looking good?
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flirty mcflirtyson
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Posted:Feb 7, 2017 3:56 pm
Last Updated:Feb 9, 2017 8:32 am
3224 Views
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i'm actually a terrible flirt. i flirt (although i think i'm just being friendly....) with just about anyone. i think it's always nice when someone pays attention and makes you think you're the only person worth talking to in a room. i especially like to focus my attention on people you can tell are ill at ease or aren't comfortable or socially awkward. my challenge is to make them comfortable and make them feel good about themselves.
but when does flirting cross the line?
i know a man who is married (well separated) who has a little thing for high heeled boots. and we hang out together every once in awhile. and when i know i'm going to be seeing him, i wear my over the knee boots (or a set of boots i know he'll like anyway). and i know he checks them out and i do tease and flirt with him a bit and i think that's a fun part of our dynamic.
but am i being a tease? in a bad way? or am i making a special effort just to give him something he likes? men on AdultFriendFinder...how would you read it?
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high sex drive...and trying to be a good girl...
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Posted:Feb 4, 2017 3:29 pm
Last Updated:Feb 4, 2017 4:03 pm
3442 Views
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i have been slowly coming to accept that my sex drive rivals those of most men. over the years, i have wondered what was wrong with me since my bfs could never keep up; didn't want to keep up. and at the end of the day, i'm a monogamy girl - not into a ton of lovers (i recently broke the double digit mark - in my 40s - and freaked out a bit) and i'm not into casual sex. but in my head, i think i'm a nympho because i absolutely adore sex. from the first moment i had it at 19, i have loved every bit of the sensations around being touched, kissed, licked and fucked.
but really I'm a good girl, i want to say. i want to erase all the bad thoughts; the semi aroused state that i find myself in all the time; the insatiable need i have to come over and over again with a man's fingers on me or a man's cock in me.
this is a serious issue. I don't want my insatiable lust to define me as a person. having a high sex drive doesn't make me promiscuous or not selective or greedy (okay maybe a little greedy - but silently so). i do want to be loved and talked with and cuddled and called affectionate names other than . and i am always ashamed after. i often blush over what i've done. but i can't help wanting what i want. all i can do is not say it out loud. not asking for it. which is all frustrating as hell but at least offers me the illusion that i am still a good girl.
cause, here's the thing. a well dressed man talking to me intelligently, articulately and actually listens to what i say can get me wet just like that.
cause a man who brushes up against my breast on the train and smells fantastic and smiles with a sexy grin and eyes that crinkle at the corners can get me wet just like that.
cause when i am at the gym and lifting heavier and stronger and i catch the eye of an athletic guy in the mirror as he notices the definition in my arms, i get wet just like that.
cause when i'm in a business meeting and presenting to a room full of powerful men who don't know i'm going commando under my skirt and they are paying attention to what i'm saying, i get wet just like that.
cause when i'm cuddling on the couch with a guy i just started seeing and we're watching a movie and he nuzzles my neck, i get wet just like that.
cause when a man i'm sleeping with whispers to me that i'm his "dirty little cock sucking " i get wet just like that.
i truly am in a semi-aroused state most of the day. i usually think about sex at least 100 times a day. because sex is never far from my thoughts; because my sexual fantasies are so vivid, i can almost smell and taste everything i'm thinking and it garners a physical reaction. because i literally have to close my legs tight and bring my focus back to my work most of the work day.
and then i hear about women who can take or leave sex when they have a partner. that it's something they sometimes have to do. or occasionally go through the motions to keep their husbands happy. and i think, wtf is wrong with me that it's never ever like that for me? i could do it everyday and sometimes all day. when i do get it, i revel in it; enjoy it completely; don't want it to end....
but i still want to be seen as a good girl. and i'm shy when it comes to admitting my sexual idiosyncrasies. i never admit any of this in public. i seldom admit this to a bf. and i never admit this to friends. i just want to be a good girl. and i want to be fucked hard and often. can the two co-exist?
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What way do you like to orgasm?
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Posted:Feb 3, 2017 11:08 pm
Last Updated:Feb 4, 2017 12:01 pm
3241 Views
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now don't be fooled. most of my ex bfs couldn't actually make me come for whatever reason. sometimes, i think it's a mental game and the more they wanted me to, the more i wanted to for their sake and then i would try to will it or force it and it wouldn't happen - frustrating both them and me.
i can do it (and do) pretty regularly with my fingers. i'm just not a toy girl. and i have come with a guy a handful of times - but always unexpectedly and not with a "go to" move per se. it's more quite by accident and i'm caught off guard. i do love it when a guy uses his fingers (it feels amazing) but it doesn't always get to completion b/c i don't know how to tell them what to do and they sort of keep missing what it is that i do need them to do (whatever that is)
...and with actual penetration, you can sometimes feel close (depending on the position) but i don't think a guy can last long enough for it to happen that way. and i certainly don't fault a guy for that - it does take a good 10-15 minutes for me to come most of the time.
so i am curious about the women on here - can your guys make you come? how does it happen for you? how have you learned to get them to get you there? and which way do you like to come best - with fingers? penetration? other ways?
help a fellow girl out
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curious about how other people meet...
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Posted:Jan 30, 2017 10:03 am
Last Updated:Jan 31, 2017 12:22 pm
3318 Views
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so i've met a few men on here, although nothing's really happened except for last night i got on the site just before christmas and tend to chat on email for a bit but i was definitely looking to meet someone. oddly enough, when i felt we'd chatted on email sufficiently and what we were looking for was fairly compatible, the men would always "disappear" or be reluctant to meet. that was something i hadn't anticipated.
so the couple of men i have met, there wasn't really that physical attraction or chemistry or schedules wouldn't work out for whatever reason. but these meetings did help inform my questions going forward - i knew what to ask on email more strategically
and then i had a little fun with one but it didn't work out. and then this weekend i met a guy who has lots of possibilities but here's the thing - i'm super shy and never initiate. and even though i've said it and written it in my profile, it seems that men might still be looking for a girl to make the first move. and i think that's super respectful and awesome. but when you're a person like me....how do you get to the good stuff?
i should say, i'm pretty up front about not sleeping with anyone in the first couple of get togethers. and i am not trying to tease anyone - just being clear about boundaries and expectations. but he found me attractive (i believe the words "sexy" and "classy" were used - how lovely is that?!?!) and he's attractive and articulate which are turn ons for me, so we made a date to get together last night.
but we chatted for what seemed like forever and i really wanted to make out - but how do you tell a guy that? how do you tell a guy that when you're shy like me?
so men in the AdultFriendFinder world - what hints could a girl give you that would allow you to still go at her pace and be respectful but still get things moving along....???
ps: the make out session did turn out awesome in the end and can't wait to see him again. but you know, for future reference, would still like to know what you think
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night time rituals...
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Posted:Jan 27, 2017 8:26 am
Last Updated:Jan 27, 2017 8:54 am
3379 Views
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now for those who've read some of my posts, you'll know i don't actually like the "m" word. it's not that i don't do it; i just don't like the sound of it or to read it. don't ask me why, it's just a turn off.
now, i have always had a lot of trouble sleeping. i sleep about 4-5 hours a night (on a good night) and have been focusing on night time rituals since all the sleep experts keep talking about how to get a good night's sleep. no blue screens an hour before bed, trying to go to bed at the same time every night, doing relaxing things, etc.
my bed time ritual includes a nice long hot shower (not a bath girl). that relaxes me. then i rub lotion on various parts of my body - legs and feet, arms and hands, etc. i brush my hair while it's still damp. then i turn out the lights, slip into my clean sheets and use my fingers to make myself come.
i'm not much of a toy girl. it's never been my thing. couldn't tell you why. but i do find that my fingers (while not as good as a man's fingers doing the same thing...) and my imagination, can get me to orgasm quite easily. i like how wet i get, how easy it is to stimulate, arouse, and relax that part of my body which results in taking the "edge" off. usually i just need the one time, i can lick my fingers after (i like the way i taste) and roll over to try and sleep. sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
other times, i need it more than once to really take the edge off. sometimes, when i have an afternoon all to myself, when the weekend isn't planned like mad, i can spend a lovely couple of hours just making myself come. over and over again. it's a lovely feeling to luxuriate in that space - fantasizing, being aroused, made to come. and i'll nap afterwards once i've completely exhausted myself. and it's a lovely exhaustion.
what are your night time rituals? does mine resonate with any of you or am i just an odd duck?
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scintillating conversation with an ex boss...
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Posted:Jan 24, 2017 9:47 pm
Last Updated:Jan 26, 2017 5:00 am
3383 Views
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so i had dinner tonight with an ex boss. he and i have one of those relationships where we flirt madly and every conversation is filled with double entendres and suggestive phrases.
and if he wasn't married, we likely would have slept together by now and probably carried on some kind of kinky and fun sexual relationship (of course, not while we worked together but we haven't worked together in over 8 years).
while we worked together, we never messed about - not only b/c he was married but b/c a woman in the male dominated profession i worked in would never be taken seriously if it got around that she slept with anyone she worked with. i'd seen other women crash and burn and always played a good girl at work.
that being said, once we no longer worked together, we have been terrible flirts. i am very attracted to him - he's built like a brick shit house (stocky and solid) and likes to be dominant. and he's super smart. a mind that can turn me on. and i think he finds me attractive - he's been trying to get me into bed for years. and we always get together for dinner when he's in town. i'm wondering if the hands off nature creates a delicious kind of sexual energy all its own? unrequited lust? and tonight was a very arousing scintillating conversation and i loved every delicious dirty word. even if i blushed through most of dinner and all of dessert
i'm curious - do other people have similar kinds of relationships? what keeps you from doing what you want with your person? and how long have you known each other and not had sex?
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the best body parts...
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Posted:Jan 22, 2017 12:19 pm
Last Updated:Jan 24, 2017 9:19 pm
3505 Views
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it seems there's a fetish for pretty much every body part. and it's amazing how different we all are...the places that get me aroused and turned on are not the same (or so it seems) than other women. and i'm always amazed at the handful of lovers i've had, and the different places that turn them on.
of course, there are the common ones - the places that are supposed to be erogenous zones of course. but i find most men also love the length of their inner thighs and the ears to be a place for some tongue and teeth attention. i love the way a man's breathing changes as you run your tongue along the inside of his thigh, anticipating where my mouth will end up but teasing - nipping, licking, kissing - oh so close to where he wants me to be but still enjoying the delicious journey to getting there, too.
i, myself, find the length of my back, my tummy, my hips...and my neck to be incredibly sensitive to the touch of a wet tongue or lips. or even a soft caress. and they are not parts of the body i would have thought were all that sexual until i had a lover who liked to go to those places. once, a lover sucked my fingers and i can't believe what kind of response that triggered! the roughness of a man's stubble along with the softness and wetness of his lips on my neck can be just about all the foreplay i need to be ready for whatever else he has in mind.
so what are the places you like to lick, kiss, suck...that aren't typically considered erogenous zones? what parts of your body have your lovers helped you experience in a whole new way?
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Dirty talking...what words turn you on/off?
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Posted:Jan 19, 2017 10:54 pm
Last Updated:Jan 23, 2017 2:30 pm
3500 Views
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so i have to admit that i love words. words for all kinds of social situations. i love a man who has an extensive vocabulary and knows how to use it. it can be one of the sexiest types of foreplay...since it's all about anticipation and imagination. it's stimulating the largest sex organ - the brain - and creating a space of intense desire with the right kind of naughtiness.
there are words that definitely turn me on. use the right ones, and i'm aroused in no time flat. i can almost orgasm just with the right dirty talk and a wee nudge of my fingers...by the same token, there are words that turn me off. i'm not sure why certain words turn me off but they can be like a cold shower - the same effect - and so unwelcome at a crucial moment.
what turns me off? the "m" word - the word we use to get ourselves off when we're by ourselves. don't ask me what it is about the word. i just don't like it. mind you, i do it. but i don't like to hear it. you can use other words in its place, of course.
the "h" word - the word that tells someone you are turned on, aroused, and want sex now. i think there are so many other words, less crude and much more interesting.
the "p" word - the word to describe a man's sexual part. while it's technically the correct term, it still doesn't have the resonance, power or naughtiness than the "c" word does. the "c" word is preferable in all instances
but when a man knows what words to turn me on...to tell me all the wicked delicious things he'd like to do to me or that he'd like me to do to him...oh yes please.
so what words turn you on? turn you off?
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the great outdoors....overrated? or underappreciated?
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Posted:Jan 16, 2017 8:20 pm
Last Updated:Jan 23, 2017 2:30 pm
3345 Views
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so i was asked recently if i'd ever had sex outdoors/in public. and while i wouldn't say exhibitionism is one of my kinks or quirks, i have occasionally had sex in public spaces...or kind of outdoors with previous bfs. on a balcony (at night, up against a tree in a park, on the hood of a car in a well lit but rather sparsely populated parking lot. i'm usually game if i'm aroused enough, my bf wants to, and getting home just won't happen soon enough....
but to be honest, all the experiences were incredibly...unsatisfying. the potential for getting caught made us start/stop quite a bit, it had to be quick (which don't get me wrong...every once in a while...!) but it was just not exciting nor did it take the "edge" off which quickies tend to do (and then you can spend longer at some point later when you have more time). i didn't expect to cum - that takes a while - but i expected the thrill to make up for the speed. that simply didn't happen for me.
so to all the ladies out there - what's your experience been with sex outdoors or in public places? are there better places to engage to get the thrill and still have a satisfying encounter? look forward to hearing from you. and to the men out there, please don't feel left out - would love to hear your thoughts, too!
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To link to this blog (smg991) use [blog smg991] in your messages.
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