When adults read "Twilight".....
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Posted:Feb 1, 2010 2:32 pm
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 8:19 am
2267 Views
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It's not just husbands, that can't seem to figure it out.
Sara J. wrote:
I'm a 38-year-old mother of two, married happily for 10 years ... I'm having an affair with a man I met while out with friends at a local club.
This man, just looks at me, and I want to do whatever he asks. I feel like I've lost my mind. I make excuses, I lie, I invent stories.
Anything to be with him, even if just for an hour. I have always considered myself a good person. I go to church and am involved in the PTA. My husband is wonderful.
What on earth is wrong with me? How do I stop?
Dear Sarah.
You go to church. Great.
You also go to the market and the dry cleaners.
You are involved in PTA. Congratulations.
So do parents and teachers, that drive reckless and evade taxes.
Your husband is wonderful. Good for him.
And apparently, not wonderful enough.
You are trying too hard to appear dense and lost in the giddiness.
You can stop by saying no, instead asking which stick to fetch.
Comparing your self to other people, means zero.
You made a vow to him, you wanted to be there.
You had your fun, not get dressed and go home.
You are doing for affairs, what "Twilight" does for vampires.
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The how and why of Sam Bradford and Colt McCoy.
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Posted:Jan 8, 2010 6:11 pm
Last Updated:Jan 9, 2010 9:27 am
2908 Views
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Maybe it was corrupt alumni, or someone working the point spread.
Just take Sam Bradford out of the 2009 Oklahoma/Texas game.
But Aaron Williams head-hunting tackle ended Bradfords season.
Not only did Mack Brown ignore it, he played it off.
Complaining that Colt McCoy was a target.
Conveniently shifting the focus for the press.
Karma and Fate step into play. Different team same colors.
National Championship. An actual big game.
McCoy goes down from a Marcell Dareus hit.
Clean? Cheap? Fate did not care.
Brown played McCoy in every game, close or meaningless.
Playing it up for the Heisman Trophy Award race.
That was awarded to Mark Ingram of Alabama.
Problem is the back-up quarterback never got quality game time.
Garrett Gilbert was thrown to the dogs, carrying a steak.
Did Colt McCoy deserve to have his career ruined? No.
A player forced out of bounds should have wiped out Mack Brown.
Ruined his arm instead. But Karma doesn't work that way.
Maybe Bradford and McCoy are destined for another role in life.
Maybe they head up the NCAA and bring about a play-off system.
When the Mack Browns of football, are dust on the trophy case.
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Guy Talk. Success With Woman: Lesson 9
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Posted:Dec 11, 2009 11:11 pm
Last Updated:Dec 14, 2009 4:24 pm
2512 Views
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Christmas letters of holiday cries for help.
Dear Trish,
I had a date this summer. The girl was wearing short shorts and four-inch heels.
It was like she got distracted getting dressed and forgot to finish the process. The result was uber-trash.
Not exactly take home to Mother material.....G, age 29
Yet her body is what attracted you to her.
When you picked her up, you didn't complain.
Later that evening, you didn't receive enough he-man adulation?
So you adopt a high brow persona, to hide behind mommies opinion?
What your date doesn't need, is date number two with the control freak/desk clerk from the Bates Motel.
Dear Trisha,
I was on a date and I thought, What was she thinking?
This chick shows up wearing a Gilligans Island hat and strange clog shoes that she tripped over the entire night.
The major takeaway from this story was not wearing anything below the ankles that was inspired by the Dutch..........J, age 22
A woman wearing accessories, you don't understand.
You don't use the props for conversation.
Take advantage of tripping for the slow dance attempt.
Or the tipsy comedy of the arm in arm, walk.
Good thing you have a juvenile sense of humor, inspired by morons.
And intoxicated idiots for friends.
Dear Trisha,
My date wore Uggs, a long beaded necklace and big, old school Elton John sunglasses.
Worn separately they might have been fine, but together it spelled disaster..........M, age 29
Oh don't you know it boyfriend!
Let me guess, the Uggs were those knee high furry boots.
That feel great when she wearing only the furry boots.
But, you never got that far did you?
Because you kept thinking: "She's a girl. Eeeewwww!"
M, you keep going on those pseudo-hetero dates and pretending.
But don't venture too far out the closet without a copy of Vogue.
Dear Trisha,
Thongs have their place. But that place isn’t five inches above low-riding jeans.
Belts were invented for a very, very good reason.........L, age 35
Yes, for guys to keep their pants above their ass crack.
You probably wear low top jeans and think it's style.
If you don't like GIRLS wearing thongs.
There's a place for what you want....prison.
Hello Trisha,
I met this attractive ten at a concert, on our first actual date, she showed up in the skimpiest jean shorts,
leather high-heeled boots, a shiny tube top and sparkly flesh color leggings.
I was totally embarrassed because this date was a daytime lunch outing, not a night on the town!
The thigh bling is what really killed it...........V, 38
Imagine the horror.
Any good arm-candy worth her salt knows better.
She's suppose to draw attention, not attract it from you.
Guys should look at you and think: "Wish I was him"
Women should think: "Wow, what has he got? Wish I was her"
Here's a thought. Next time flaunt/date with your blow up doll!
Don't be shy.
Don't be afraid to ask.
Don't use your real name, please.
Merry Christmas, Darlings.
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Horoscopes November 23 - 30
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Posted:Nov 23, 2009 2:08 pm
Last Updated:Dec 4, 2009 10:46 pm
2189 Views
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Happy Birthday Miley Cirus, Christina Applegate, Tina Turner and Kim Delaney.
I will be on holiday vacation from November 25th, until December 1st.
Sagittarius
Don't let blunt words run away with you this week.
You always say something, you later regret.
Know who you can trust toward the end of the week.
You want more excitement in your love, personal and sex life.
This rocks the boat in your current laughable, relationship.
Significant other person is about to show their true colors.
Capricorn
A plan and sense of order makes you feel much more comfortable.
This will provide you with a false sense of security.
Surprises will happen and catch you off guard this week.
Be flexible, versatile, and ready if you want to have fun.
Your sexual and moral ambiguity will be questioned.
Pleasure shows up when and where you least expect it.
Aquarius
Surprising news could make for an interesting weekend.
Interesting is finding a suitcase, full of cash.
Interesting is being hit by a suitcase, from a plane.
Impulsive, angry words put a nasty chill into the holiday.
Look for kindness and show it to others if you want romance.
Acting without being cruel attracts the one you want.
Pisces
Take some chances on Friday and Saturday.
A new look or make over will boost your self-confidence.
Also increases your chances to meet interesting persons.
Don't let caution or common sense stop you from experimenting.
People will point past you, and run screaming in horror.
You're then doing something that is obviously too dangerous.
Aries
You feel ready to take a chance on love again.
The odds are stacked against you, the chips are down.
Take a page from the Gemini handbook? Care only about self?
As long as you play fast and loose, it does matter.
The fun of the chase can rival the outcome of romance.
Only is love doesn't endure and it's only a one night stand.
Taurus
Is it time now to forgive and forget, over Thanksgiving dinner?
Living in the past keeps you from repeating the same mistakes.
Fall for someone foolishly, have some fun you will soon regret.
Or continue waiting for the perfect person to come along.
Practice makes perfect and can be very enjoyable.
Coin toss. Live in the moment or plan a life in the future.
Gemini
Your friends are the key to your social life this week.
Easier to create your false BS front, with the help of cronies.
Use self-control, laying down rules to significant other.
Not that what you think or say, is wrong in any way.
You need to put words across with a greater amount of tact.
A good cook/maid/lapdog/sex-toy is hard to find during the holidays.
Cancer
Find balance between emotional connection and pointless drivel.
This will be tough because you go to the extreme in both.
After blessing the food, you start screaming you hate cranberry.
Make this work for you, by sharing your anguished past.
Then break into tears, for having so much to be thankful.
Your pathetic display will maximize all offers of desert.
Leo
The worst travel week of the year and you want to travel.
To connect with someone of a different background.
To fight off constant thoughts of someone in your background.
You substitute sex and recreation to color your lack of family.
Yes you have much to be thankful, and you don't waste time.
So you over do it before seeking much needed rest, by Sunday.
Virgo
Throw caution to the wind this week, take on bold new tasks.
You're eager to bring novelty into the lives of others.
It's awkward as you discover work's more difficult than talk.
Confidence gives you courage to bomb in ways no one imagined.
Your failure today, fuels your journey for disaster tomorrow.
"As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly"
Libra
You are full of creative juice, and imagination.
Stay away from Virgo people and their drawing board plans.
Make certain that you exercise your actions in the real world.
You lose touch with practical considerations and safety.
It's easy to be overly dramatic in expressing yourself.
Intelligent self-control is the key. HA! ha, ha. Oh, that's rich.
Scorpio
Know where to draw the line when asking for what you need.
Your requests are so outrageous, you win people by curiosity.
Others don't share your passion, your intensity scares them.
Remember, there's no right or wrong when it comes to desire.
Don't tone down your approach, people will only stand closer.
"Thaw the turkey? Frying it in hot oil can do that, right?"
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Guy Talk: Success with Women Lesson 6
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Posted:Nov 20, 2009 4:19 pm
Last Updated:Nov 20, 2009 4:47 pm
2215 Views
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Guys be guys. Stop raising the bar.
Letter from a woman.
Dear Trisha Ann,
I was trapped with the boyfriend from hell.
He dresses well, listens as much as he talks.
He's attractive and not vain. He's has a career.
He's like someone from a book, I keep getting them!
I started talking and being really gross with him.
I said that's how I am, when I get to know you.
He suggested I get counseling, after awhile he accepted me.
Sexually he's now all about himself, and then leaves.
We don't have quiet evenings or weekend get aways anymore.
We were saying bye and I said "see you this weekend"
He said "I don't know maybe" with no eye contact.
He called two weeks later, for me to pick up his dry cleaning.
A few days later, he called me over for a 2AM booty call.
I danced around like a puppy when he did.
Other than that he vanishes for days at a time.
Now he acts like a guy, I feel such a spark again!
.......Saved from another real man.
Hello, Saved:
Your letter is inspiration to guys (not men) everywhere.
Too often guys wake up, get a clue and stop being punks.
Fortunately you switched to gross/stupid spring break mode.
He no longer feels as if, you ever had a brain.
He did feel concern for your emotional and mental health.
But you can't expect him to be interested for long.
You're damaged. Held together by a cell phone and a biofit bra.
Being that you're dense as peach yogurt, he now ignores you.
2AM sex is relief for him, as he looks for a real relationship.
That "spark" is delusion setting fire to your future.
NOTE JUST FOR THE GUYS
The lesson is clear, don't raise the bar.
Keep your expectations low, flakes are out there.
Profile females with low or no self-esteem. Two drink minimum.
Reply "whats that" to anything she says, as you check out the room.
To intoxicated, airhead, abuse junkies that's hot.
Don't worry about emotionally stable women, they will avoid you or taser you.
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Guy Talk: Success With Women Lesson 3
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Posted:Nov 17, 2009 1:15 pm
Last Updated:Nov 18, 2009 10:03 am
2142 Views
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DATING, DELIVERY PIZZA, DODGING THE CHECK.
Should I pay for both people when dating?
SIGNED: Confused by DVD dating tips.
The trouble with paying for dinner on a date:
1. You are revealed as employed.
You can't hope to watch mindless action movies on her couch.
While she works to support both of you.
2. This can be expensive for you.
Someone conditioned to eat cold pizza, over the kitchen sink.
3. The woman might pose as hard to get.
Not wanting you think she's an easy piece of ass.
4. There could be an onset of adult behavior.
She might sit up straight, chew with her mouth closed.
Engage in actual conversation, not using LOL as a word.
5. You pay at museums, movies, live theater, quiet restaurants...etc
Almost anywhere outside your apartment.
Not for the cheap and anti-social.
Also leads to talking about the event, encouraging get to know time.
You might give insight that you are emotionally healthy.
Your hold card is being a complete ass.
So that she is desperate to keep your attention, and change you!
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Your Horoscopes November 2nd-8th.
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Posted:Nov 2, 2009 10:40 am
Last Updated:Mar 9, 2010 1:39 pm
2341 Views
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Happy Birthday Kathy Griffin
SCORPIO
You clean house. Romantically, financially, personally.
You realize what and who, is no longer useful in your life.
And you pile them and it, all on the curb.
Homeless people picking through your trash consider you a saint.
The person you made homeless, kicks garbage cans into the yard.
SAGITTARIUS
You're working long hours, your relationship is not.
Less was more with your Halloween costume, again.
To make good impressions, try not to say anything stupid.
No one is listening anyway, you're eye candy....period.
Serious issues to discuss with significant other.
Listen carefully and respond as you are told to respond.
CAPRICORN
You want to be somebody or become something.
You made changes that put you where you are today.
You are graduating, getting promotions, and achieving.
You have many responsibilty, you think you can handle it.
This could be a rewarding time in your life.
Tape this to your mirror keep reading it all week.
AQUARIUS
You feel the loss of support and lost in general.
This week all this and light at the end of the tunnel will fade.
What ended is no longer a problem, because it's not coming back.
Maybe consider just running away from your problems.
They will here waiting, when you come back.
Do anything you can to give yourself an advantage.
PISCES
Relationships are still bad. Some end, others you wish would.
Now you have money problems to deal with.
You question the values of other people.
You question the changes you made, were they were worth it?
Someone could quit their job or become self-employed.
Holding a "will work for food sign" is a job.
ARIES
You feel physically tired, discouraged and sleepy.
Too much trick-or-treat. Not enough sleep.
Your relationship is more trouble than it's worth.
You could end it now but thanksgivng is means family questions.
Now for the good part, tonight you can get some sleep.
Start planning to dump someone, now.
TAURUS
You are still deciding what want to be when you grow up.
Halloween you enjoyed being a superhero.
Back at work today, you have concerns with and job.
Starting now, you can move beyond all that. Hire a babysitter.
You can get your life in order. Yes you can!
Focus on your health. Stop eating all that candy already!
GEMINI
Your cool arrogant manner is bait to the emotionally damaged.
Remember to fake sensitivity and a protective attitude.
Stay in quiet places where you can sell your whispered BS.
The naive, gullible and insecure will hang on every word.
Better yet, make an intimate connection on line or by phone.
This is better than paying for drinks at a local nightspot.
CANCER
You feel the direction your life is changing.
You want a home, living in your car is brutal.
You have made a move recently. Now you are doubting yourself.
Standing completely still is a good way to get nowhere.
You could hang new wallpaper and pretend your life is better.
You will work loudly to establish peace and quiet.
LEO
National Coming Out Night is behind you.
Now you feel like you're watching the parade go by.
Relax, recover your energy from the social scene.
Friday ends the week, starting the weekend again.
Return to the spotlight on late Saturday, early Sunday.
You will get all the attention, you can handle.
VIRGO
When you know what you really value, you can be motivated.
Some people don't work only for money, they want to succeed.
Some people work just for money, they want to survive.
You spend more time with sad friends than with your relationship.
You work hard for everything in your romance.
Not worth it if you're not receiving as much as you give.
LIBRA
This is an eventful week in your life, you survived Halloween.
You have been cutting back and letting go of waste.
Making time to attack the vital and the oncoming.
You are learning skills and preparing for major change.
You will see what is different, domestically and on job scene.
You will see a deeper understanding of who you are.
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Halloween Horoscopes October 19th - 31rd
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Posted:Oct 19, 2009 11:03 am
Last Updated:Apr 18, 2024 8:19 am
2271 Views
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Horoscope guide for next two weeks.
Madame Trisha, the all knowing and all seeing,
goes on vacation October 22nd.
Returns November 2nd...See you somewhere in between.
LIBRA
Feelings of dissatisfaction surface. Reducing self-confidence.
Change a habit or eliminate someone from your life.
Start moving forward again. A makeover can be helpful.
Don't use it as a way to avoid addressing emotional issues.
Buying a $100,000 sports cars will not address emotions.
Fresh starts and fantasy bring imagination to your personal life.
SCORPIO
Avoid dishonest people, secret information can be exposed.
Plunge the depths of your emotions, digging up past issues.
Valuable to seek the truth, unwise to be the victim.
Unhappy with a current relationship, change the situation.
Be kind but firm, making as gentle a transition as possible.
Break up after Halloween prank egg throwing period.
SAGITTARIUS
Your confidence and self-esteem is low, as usual.
That explains your yearly near naked Halloween costume.
Bold, stupid behavior expands your social and sexual life.
Don't take yourself too seriously, your significant other doesn't.
Time for a important discussion about your future together.
Don't get kicked out, the temperature is dropping.
CAPRICORN
Do not separate practical from personal matters.
Emphasize competence making a connection between work and play.
Take care of your obligations, it doesn't sound like fun.
It will clear the way to a more enjoyable time with others.
If you doubt yourself, counter negative thoughts with action.
Or else, small issues will grow into a big problems.
AQUARIUS
You meet someone playing games, you want expression of heart.
Work on details, smooth out problems with a current romance.
Or remove obstacles to meet a new romance.
If you're criticized for petty issues, make a change.
You love freedom, so any infringement provokes negative reaction.
Responsibility boosts public image, but gets in the way of play.
PISCES
You can finally face a difficult issue with courage.
Get rid of a person or behavior that doesn't serve you.
Sincerity makes it more likely to connect with someone.
Be stronger expressing desire and holding others to commitments.
You know how to be tender, but being firm is critical now.
Halloween brings romantic confidence and chances for success.
ARIES
Advantage to being vulnerable, it makes you more approachable.
Sometimes for and to the wrong people, who seek power.
Watch for power struggles that undermine your trust.
Push past that and pleasure begins to shine in your life.
Listen as a leader to show that you really care about others.
If want them to care about your cause, as much as you care about yourself.
TAURUS
Expect intense interactions as Halloween arrives.
This could put a current partnership to the test.
If either of you is not fully satisfied, expect some issues.
If you're single and looking go for it now.
If you play it safe and don't want to feel any emotions...
Then you must be a fucking Vulcan, who only believes logic.
GEMINI
Socially rich period today thru Halloween.
You attract gullible admirers with ease.
Your domestic other is angry, jealous and manipulative.
Think about letting go. Make way for fulfilling relationships.
You get significant public appearance and attention.
Pretend to be interested in your latest object of affection.
CANCER
Being passive and waiting will not advance your interests.
Step up and take the initiative to get what you want.
It might rub someone the wrong way, so what? Screw them!
Negotiations needed to regain balance in a current relationship.
Your need for freedom shouldn't deny you the intimacy you want.
Talk to a Gemini about finding someone dumb enough to buy this.
LEO
Avoid coming on too strong, listen as much as you talk.
Have honest relationship discussion about your future together.
Give more in a partnership and to expect more back in return.
That is, if you want to be there at all with that person.
Be generous with people, whatever pain you experienced fades.
When anger is replaced by acceptance and trust, maybe.
VIRGO
Open to deeper conversations, as mixed romantic signals clear.
Perceptions are sharper and discussions more meaningful.
You feel more attractive as health improves.
Identifying problems within yourself or in others is easy.
Coming up with solutions is more difficult, but more rewarding.
Don't permit a sharp tongue to hurt someone you care about.
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Crystal Ball Horoscopes October 5-11.
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Posted:Oct 5, 2009 1:42 pm
Last Updated:Oct 12, 2009 12:23 pm
2516 Views
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Happy Birthday David Lee Roth. October 10th.
LIBRA
You have the weight of the world on your shoulders this week.
You can earn respect that can strengthen your relationship.
Seek help instead of coping with problems by drinking alcohol.
Pour out your doubts and fears to someone on a deeper level.
Pay a professional, they will not laugh at and ridicule you.
SCORPIO
This a week that plays into a weekend for travel and adventure.
See people from different backgrounds, attend cultural events.
Please your need for the exotic, add spice to your personal life.
You will feel insecure, that's natural. You're playing a tourist.
Combat this with taboo rituals that lift your spirits.
SAGITTARIUS
You're acting serious about your committed relationship.
You want to get closer to someone new. This is the week for it.
You easily fail the test of your commitment and compassion.
It's not all about fun, games and fucking right now.
Go deeper emotionally or find yourself sitting on the sidelines.
Enjoy the view from the bench.
CAPRICORN
There is risk with reward this week in relationships.
Numerous partners are likely to stir plenty of activity.
Jealousy, opposition, aggression stirs up resentment and anger.
You manage your emotions by avoiding questions.
Skip facing the truth, then take positive steps forward.
AQUARIUS
Romantic opposition can provoke impulsive behavior by Friday.
Circumstance and emotion change quickly. Know where you stand.
Explore unusual territory in physical relationships.
While fun, maintain the discipline of safe sex.
To avoid chaos and itching in your personal life.
PISCES
The world feels weird this week, you've a chance to find love.
If you can survive the doubt, regret, pain and confusion.
It's your turn to be rewarded with attention and infection.
Don't spend all your time taking care of others.
You will miss out on an opportunity for your own pleasure.
ARIES
You are walking on eggshells this week, Friday is miles away.
It's wise to be gentle with yourself. Seek cozy environments.
Avoid noisy places when meeting people. Avoid noisy people.
All the better for sentimental moods that stir desire.
Which can lead you to reconnect with someone from your past.
TAURUS
Your nerves are ragged from impulsive attractions.
You will settle down by Saturday, mostly from exhaustion.
Be firm in your convictions and grounded in your action.
Say little and stay with that, don't dance about.
You can avoid saying something stupid that kills romance.
GEMINI
Social plans get delayed or blocked leading to this weekend.
Simplify your life by going cheap, uncomplicated and domestic.
Don't let a lack of cash keep you from having a good time.
Your lap significant other is within your budget.
No need spending dollars on someone smart and exciting.
CANCER
Your emotions build all week and come to a peak.
That means intense moments, especially late Friday and Sunday.
Trying to hold on to what you have is frustrating.
It's better to let go and make those radical changes now.
Attraction for someone needs time before they feel the same way.
LEO
Stay out of the spotlight this week and weekend.
Find a quiet inconspicuous place to hang out or invite someone.
Plan for All Hallows Eve in grand spooky fashion.
Don't force the action to get attention, that you want.
Play it cool, even if that means alone, than coming on too strong.
VIRGO
Friends are the key to your intimate relationships.
Going out with large groups is good, the more the merrier.
It also means too many bakers, baking the cookies.
You will see, hear or read excellent but questionable advice.
The truth might not come from someone you don't trust.
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High School VS the NFL
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Posted:Oct 2, 2009 3:08 pm
Last Updated:Oct 12, 2009 12:26 pm
3185 Views
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Mobile, Alabama.
09/25/09 a small school in a small town has a big moment.
Baker High had a 19 game losing streak, going back to 2007.
At their homecoming game, they get a long awaited win.
The team they won against; Robertsdale High School Bears.
Last game Baker Hornets won in 2007, against Robertsdale.
Unfortunately, the same weekend the Detroit Lions broke a streak.
Losing 19 games and finally getting a win over Washington.
In the NFL, a 19 game losing streak is reason for termination.
Not glossy in-depth feature segments.
Even with e-mail and fax, ESPN decides to let Baker go unnoticed.
No human interest story, no salute for the love of the game.
Baker wins against the Robertsdale Bears.
Baker ignored, in shadow of the Detroit Lions.
Friday, Baker tries for another win. Opponent Williamson Lions.
Sunday, Detroit Lions look for a win against the Chicago Bears.
Key the eerie Twilight Zone theme music.
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Public Option Horoscopes September 28-October 4.
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Posted:Sep 28, 2009 2:42 pm
Last Updated:Sep 29, 2009 7:29 am
2181 Views
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VIRGO
Your world spins out of control by Friday.
Unpredictable behavior or mood swings upset plans.
Don't slow down to figure it out, pick up the pace.
Desire rises as you leave your comfort zone.
Plunge into the unfamiliar with an adventurous individual.
LIBRA
You attract aggressive people who could rub you the wrong way.
Or excite your interest by rubbing the right way.
This isn't a time to be delicate, so express yourself.
Get rid of this person or jump into this new adventure.
This not a long-term commitment, pack only a toothbrush.
SCORPIO
Be suspicious of the motivations of everyone.
Life is confusing, trust no one. Don't believe anything you read.
Wait until the weekend to set aside your skepticism.
After Friday allow impulse to guide you.
More fun playing with surprising people than the easy to control.
SAGITTARIUS
By Friday you will be horny, freaky and jumpy.
Saturday finds you opening your heart and legs to love.
It's about being playful, not trying to solidify a relationship.
Living in this moment is not appropriate or smart.
But it's right on target for you, and expected.
CAPRICORN
By the weekend, your plans go into the trash.
You can't stick to schedules or count on others reliability.
Stop keeping score or being accountable, act more like .
If you say or do something foolish, just laugh and act stupid.
Romance doesn't come to the desirable, it settles for the available.
AQUARIUS
Have a good time with friends, ignore that one special person.
Group activities are much more fun, than one on one.
Participating in an orgy is likely to expose you to swine flu.
Whether you're the leader or the carrier, you'll catch something.
Next week your significant other can visit you at a hospital.
PISCES
You feel more edgy as the days progress.
Trying to hold onto someone, rattles their nerves.
Trying to maintain emotional stability, rattles your nerves.
Shake old habits, pleasure comes from new manipulation.
Start something new instead of attempting to repair the past.
ARIES
Tide turns in your favor as you bet heavy on the Alabama game.
Trust your intuition and be more open with your feelings.
You need a dynamic individual to light your fire.
Don't wait for someone else to make the first move.
Take initiative, get your life moving in a new direction.
TAURUS
Your practical personality boundaries will fail you.
You stretch your romantic trojan protection, until it snaps.
You give too much, play too much and expect too much.
Still, you try more new experiences.
You can't maintain a proper sense of proportion.
GEMINI
This week, you get your personal and home life in order.
Inflict new domestic damage to secure your fragile emotions.
Save money by locking up credit cards and being cheap.
That makes it easy for you in your current relationship.
As you reach out to find a new physical relationship.
CANCER
A long week puts you in the mood to play by Friday.
The weekend finds you tied up with responsibilities.
Take charge on a job, it strengthens your confidence.
This allows you to manage relationships skillfully.
So you can hopefully enjoy and not satisfy everyone else.
LEO
Saturday will stir your desire for freedom and the kinky.
Relationships can get boring, don't take it out on your partner.
Seek out new people in new places to pump your enthusiasm.
Let yourself feel innocent and act like a beginner.
Sing "Like A Virgin" as you get ravished.
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Unfair, Unbalanced Horoscopes September 21-27
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Posted:Sep 21, 2009 10:32 am
Last Updated:Sep 26, 2009 10:28 am
2548 Views
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VIRGO
You're thinking about money, career, cash flow.
Wishing about things that make you happy.
Take care of what you already have, go as far as to appreciate what you already have.
What you already have is what you've got, so it's yours?
Since you're thinking about buying something new, think about where it will fit into your life.
Or if it will fit into your car, or if you can get someone hot to carry it out for you.
Maybe even deliver it to your home for assembly.
The actual question for you is, what or who, or what do you really want?
LIBRA
This is a busy week. Pay attention at social gatherings.
You can pick out a special someone from across the room.
That someone will have a bored, stoic expression on their face.
When you notice, don't play games, even in that situation.
The flirtation is fun, the conversation is better.
Trying to be something you are not, makes you part of the
side show that's making them gag.
SCORPIO
Look for and give straight, honest answers and talk this week.
This is your time to connect with that special someone.
Save a relationship that you let erode from neglect.
Denial of fault will not help, accept blame and open talks.
Ridding yourself of negative ideas is the reward.
Along with building a stronger bond of communication.
Expose your emotions and expose anything else that aids your cause.
SAGITTARIUS
You and one of your lovers need to work on your stagnant affair.
Close eyes, cast off any remaining self-respect and perform whatever tricks will satisfy them.
Sparks fly, as self-esteem plummets.
Attention from your significant other is lacking.
Your careless comments chill the air.
They took you for granted long ago, and stopped listening.
That's no reason to be upset, you're used to being treated like yesterdays newspaper.
CAPRICORN
You can go to the extreme this week and encounter the intense.
Your emotions rise to the surface, even against your logic.
You want to be in control of your feelings and this is opposite.
Don't fight your emotions with your second guessing.
Try to be honest and open without being harsh and cold.
Damn it Jim! You're a Capricorn not some green blooded Vulcan!
You can win over hearts and minds that were closed in the past.
Just don't do that V symbol with your fingers.
AQUARIUS
This week will test your polite, easy going personality.
Even you will grind your teeth at certain individuals.
They will use sandpaper to rub you the wrong way.
You will want to rip their hair out, don't do it.
Best tactic avoid confrontation, as you feeling edgy.
Count to ten, more than once if needed.
Stay in the group of people you know well.
Relax with the trusted and the well known.
Don't expose yourself to unpleasant, insane, dangerous people.
Or Capricorn people.
PISCES
Friends and groups will be challenging for you this week.
Leave yourself an escape route, before joining a crowd.
You could be responsible for their questionable behavior.
Pick your playmates carefully to stay on the pleasurable side.
You feel unusually passionate and intense, also known as horny.
You meet someone who provokes some deep soul-searching.
You will be involved with money, or lack of such.
Not just yours but shared and joint possessions.
ARIES
You are feeling tired from your lack of good sleep.
Your low energy is translating to feeling discouraged.
That feeling of impending doom, is only fatigue.
This will pass, as issues in your life come to a head.
This means you must the circle wagons or regroup.
Organization before moving forward is key.
Many errors at work will be a frustration.
Learn from business partnerships and close friends.
You can you learn more from your one to one encounters.
TAURUS
This week you should be the inventor of the index.
You show up at work ready to streamline the process.
You want to be in control of your life and life itself.
You want order, organized order. And to define that order.
You need to be able to put your hand on exactly what you want.
Files, folders, tools, doughnuts, a $100 bill.
You may never feel this anal retentive again for months.
People up the ladder will remember this week.
People working WITH you will curse this week.
Afterward, you'll feel wonderfully satisfied, and rewarded by your efforts. If you are not strangled before friday.
GEMINI
Untie that aggravating domestic knot, called a relationship.
Change low expectation by meeting a compelling new person.
This is your week for pleasure, fun, romance and sexual affairs.
Creative flair returns, you find inspiration in your new victim.
We mean in your new casual/sexual relationship. Well same thing.
Social occasions will be stimulating. You're the winner.
Entertain at home, impress friends while saving bar expenses.
Your domestic other will be happy to play cook and host.
As if they have a choice in the situation.
Keep control of finance, by cutting significant others spending. But not yours of course.
CANCER
You are more involved with family events.
Childhood memories surface, it's the return to school season.
With many activities, you need time to meditate and think.
Clear mind with sweaty physical exercise. "Yeah Baby!"
Real estate concerns and opportunities become known.
It is important to know what you want, not trying to please impossible people or allow yourself to be bullied.
Romance requires as much strength, as tenderness.
Don't be trapped or feel the need to play someones game.
It will only waste your time and create ill feeling later
LEO
A busy week. Places to see, things to go, and people to do!
Increased errands, jobs, talks, reading, writing and studying.
All at the same hysterical pace.
This helps you learn about your style of communication.
My hips don't lie. Express your real thoughts and intentions.
You tell it like it is, or simply be physical.
Don't get caught on company security video camera.
Pleasure comes to you through work, after hours behind locked doors.
You don't want to put yourself under someones thumb, maybe.
But being cooperative could lead to a physical connection.
Taking care of business could lead to finding a good time.
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Word of Honor Horoscopes September 14-20
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Posted:Sep 14, 2009 11:57 am
Last Updated:Sep 19, 2009 11:47 am
2536 Views
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VIRGO
This week takes you on a rough ride. Hardcore bondage and no safe words.
Don't let a pesky friday night Emergency Room visit drain the fun from your weekend.
To take sides in a fight between friends, will get you in trouble. Keep your cool and maintain the middle ground.
It makes you appear more attractive and it's much easier on your wardrobe.
LIBRA
From monday to the weekend, emotions come to the surface.
Show will and grace under pressure. Or watch it on DVD.
Practice diplomacy with delicate matters.
Self control in tough situations increases your desirability and life span.
Your cool resolve will excite a current partner or attract a new one. Relax, be smooth.
SCORPIO
Your relationship requires privacy. Yes, be secretive.
Keep your cell phone and PDA in sight.
Close unfinished business, free up time to play by friday.
Rumors can be hurtful and dangerous at this time.
Loose cannon comments get out of hand.
Save the off color jokes for another time.
Keep quiet in mixed company. Listen more, talk less.
SAGITTARIUS
Your antics rock a few boats and beds this week.
You speak your mind, without thinking first as always.
Your sense of humor is misunderstood by someone under stress.
Your sarcasm is too blunt to recognize that you are joking.
Dangers of being kicked out of the bar, by bouncer and bartender.
Or kicked out of the house, back on the street by significant other.....again.
CAPRICORN
Prepare for travel and perfect your techniques.
You're close to your dreams. But too fixated on something.
You're obsessed with method.
Something you counted is not turning out the way you hoped.
The sooner you let go and redirect the better.
Your drag queen friend is a great choice for attention.
But she has her own life too. Don't plan ahead.
AQUARIUS
Travel brings romance on monday, your flirtation pays off.
Sex outdoors is the way to go on wednesday.
Stop thinking and trust your feelings. Romance burns on friday.
Work demands might crash into your love life on saturday.
Get tasks out of the way on sunday as soon as possible.
So you can close the weekend with passion and relaxation.
PISCES
Be bold, reveal your feelings, show love on monday.
By midweek you have their attention, time for using tact.
You can now make or break the moment by saying the wrong words.
Entertain friends as friday nears. Careful with parties of two.
Sending a mixed message derails love on saturday.
Foot work and damage control can get you back on track by sunday.
But being aware saves you the getting off track.
ARIES
You need to break your self-imposed limitations.
Bi-curious is a trendy word for people afraid to say same sex.
You're the god of war, stop acting like a pansy.
Romance can heat up on monday, it's up to you.
Look for romance during work-related activities after friday 5PM.
Problems pop up with your significant other by saturday.
Romance appears again on sunday, which traces back to....friday?
TAURUS
You are irresistible on monday, return to work is grand.
Your wants gets confused and complicated by wednesday.
Opportunity to cash in on thursday and friday.
Show off your your expertise, speak up, show your worth.
Get your name out there in the mix, don't be overlooked.
Bravado left over from the week upsets romance on saturday.
Did you let your triumph become bragging? Don't do that.
GEMINI
Your relationship, your home, your life, feel really secure.
You have what you really think you need and want.
And you only had to destroy two, maybe three lives to get it.
You believe you are way so smart, but you're kidding yourself.
The handwriting is on the wall, and you're ignoring it.
You've been with someone who isn't smart enough to cheat,
and not smart enough to lie. You're victories are hollow.
Once you dump this one, you meet a better class of person.
CANCER
You don't want to change. Look at everything, change is good.
Stagnation is death. Do you want stagnation?
Listen to the sound if it....staggg-nay-shun. You want that?
This week, you are getting a chance or a good look at action.
Yes, it's new. Yes, it's scary. Yes, it's been put off too long.
Romance midweek during activities or community events.
Speak from the heart on thursday and friday.
Be daring with passion on sunday. Skip the vanilla sex.
LEO
Time to repair, restore, revitalize and rehabilitate.
Your trashy outfits and attitude draw admirers, the wrong kind.
Spending habits have killed your checking accounts.
Reminiscing about the past drags you deeper into the past.
Wasting all the effort, the therapeutic work did for you.
Flirting makes you irresistible this weekend with horny people.
A trip can attract wealthy romance, as well police officers.
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