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The Lost Art of Flirting
Posted:Jan 18, 2021 8:40 am
Last Updated:Jan 19, 2021 1:01 pm
37 Views

Why come AdultFriendFinder if you're not looking for a random hook-up?

I get asked this question constantly. It doesn't matter how much substance I put in my profile, how many ways I try explain what I'm looking for or how many times I repeat myself; the never-ending stream of "Wana fuk" messages just keep rolling in.

What happened flirting and chasing the person you're interested in? I realize this is an adult sex site and that alone should cut down on some of the more boring aspects of "dating", but that does't mean tact and decorum can't be used. Honestly, if anything, I think they're even more important, given the nature of this site. The fact of the matter is, everyone is looking for and interested in finding sex in some way, shape, size or form. Because of this, people literally have their pick of dozens, if not hundreds of partners. It's crucial be able stand out in the crowd, so rather than assuming that because you're both on a sex site it automatically means you're gonna get laid, highlight some of your critical thinking skills and turn on her brain before thinking your mere presence in her inbox is gonna make her panties wet.

This is where flirting comes in. "Show me your tits", is not flirting. "Wat r u doing", is not flirting. "Yer hot. Wanna fuck?", is not flirting. And news flash, none of that is attractive, enticing, or flattering, either. I may be a girl looking for sex, but that doesn't mean I'm just gonna lay down and spread my legs for any dick that rolls passed. First of all, I'm not hard up to get laid. Secondly, I enjoy conversation with quick witted people. Third, I'm an attention from hell and I thrive on compliments, good conversation, affection, and hearing about how I turn you on.

A guy who can flirt well seems to be few and far between, and that fact makes sad. I totally get wanting to cut through the red tape, but at least take the time to review a person's profile and decide if they seem like the "cut straight to it" kind before doing so. I put the time and effort into writing my profile descriptively so as to cut down on the amount of BS thrown at me; sending me a message asking questions that my profile clearly answers or discusses is an immediate turn off.

Most women, myself included, get a lot more out of sex when their mind is as engaged as their body. That doesn't mean I want to date you or fall in love with you, or have a future with you...it just means I want you to take the time to figure out what turns me on and makes me wet without asking ridiculously blunt questions. Subtlety does have its place and its uses, and a guy who can flirt strategically is a huge turn .
4 Comments
What is a BBW?
Posted:Sep 9, 2020 8:25 pm
Last Updated:Dec 12, 2020 9:17 am
2184 Views

What defines a woman as a BBW? I've spent my entire adult life at 300+lbs & always considered myself a BBW. I'm now in the 190's & officially lost on how describe my body type. So, in your opinion & point of view, what is it that makes a woman "big & beautiful"?
Any woman 300lbs or more is a BBW
Any woman who wears a size 12 or larger is a BBW
BBW is an attitude, not a dress size or weight.
An above average size body area (extra large thighs, ass, tummy or tits) make a BBW
4 Comments , 52 votes
Weightloss
Posted:Apr 26, 2020 2:01 pm
Last Updated:Aug 14, 2020 5:32 am
611 Views

So...i could really use some motivation and inspiration from a healthy, dominant-type these days.

I'm a 38yr old SAHM and I swear, i can come with some impressive excuses for why i can't eat right or workout. I had gastric sleeve surgery in December 2019 & progress has been slow...primarily because my self-discipline SUCKS. I have a *want* eat healthy, appropriately sized meals and workout daily...but I can't seem make that want line with what I *do*.

My goal weight is 5lbs, so I've got about 60 more pounds drop (I've lost about 100lbs currently).

Ideally, I'm looking for someone experienced with online domination/training who understands the best results happen when you can get into a subs mind & figure out how to make them tic. Definitely not opposed RL meetings if you're close enough, but considering how I live in the middle of nowhere, I'm certainly not expecting it. This person should be around my age (cuz I'd like fantasize about fucking you, quite honestly & I'm not fucking anyone younger than 33 or older than 55), and have a body that proves you know what you're doing/instructing me to do. You also need to be flexible enough to understand i will have dietary & time restrictions.

My weight has always been a really sensitive area of discussion for me, so please know that as well. If you want to help out, let me know!!

You can contact me here or find me on k ! k

xbeautifulxliex
0 Comments
Our busy life
Posted:Apr 28, 2019 9:53 am
Last Updated:Apr 6, 2020 10:43 pm
757 Views

Hubby and I haven't been very darn active around here lately, but it's honestly for good reason - we're expecting baby #3 sometime in the next 6 to 9 weeks!

Who knew where we'd be a little more than a year ago...it just seems crazy.

A year ago, I was so angry and hurt I couldn't hardly function. Through a lot of tears, arguments, negotiations and some more fighting, we finally managed to work out a system where we're both happy, comfortable, and more open and honest with each other then we ever thought was possible. Our sex life improved by leaps and bounds, our marriage is stronger than ever, and we're happier and more content then we ever thought we could be. And wouldn't ya know it...just when everything seems like it's going great and right on track, we finally get a little peanut to stick as the cherry on top of our glorious Sundae!

We are so, SO excited for this baby to arrive! This will be our last one, so while mama deals with the sadness goes along with realizing there are no more babies to come, we're really excited to become a family of 5! Hubby is looking forward to getting clipped in July (as crazy as may sound) and we're trying to decide what kind of birth control to put me on for the next couple of years until I have a total hysterectomy.

My mom died of Ovarian Cancer in 20 and her grandma died of Uterine Cancer, so we've decided our safest course of action is simply going to be for me to get the whole damn mess cut out. We just don't want me going through menopause and hysterectomy restrictions with a newborn lol

I still haven't ever hooked up with anyone and I still don't know I ever will. I'm very content looking, flirting, and imagining the possibilities for right now
2 Comments
3 months in...
Posted:Aug 12, 2018 1:20 pm
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2020 6:19 am
879 Views

Well, hubby & I are about 3 months into our open marriage and things are going well!!

He's played a few times, and I've come to realize that things I initially thought would bother me (such as where his hookup live in relation to us) really haven't been an issue.

He has had some more trouble adjusting than me, simply because he still doesn't believe I separate sex and emotion as good, if not better, than he does. We met on AdultFriendFinder, so it's easy to see where he's coming from.

His biggest problem has been the fact that I've mentioned multiple times that I need some kind of mental connection in order to hook up with someone. In his head, that means I'm wanting the kind of friendship and bond that we share - this couldn't be further from the truth!! What I mean is that I need to be able to laugh & joke & have a conversation with someone. Once he got that figured out, he's felt a bit better, I think.

Our sex life has gotten so much more fun!!! We flirt more, fuck more, and generally have a better time in bed than we've had since we moved in together!! It's been wonderful!

I'm slowly starting to figure our a bit better what I'm looking for and what I'm interested in. I'm still not 100% comfortable sharing that with hubby, but I'm getting better at it. And practice makes perfect, right!?

I'm really pleased that we ventured down this path and I'm looking forward to what the future holds!
2 Comments
The Beginning
Posted:May 29, 2018 5:56 am
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2019 10:00 am
1189 Views

Open Marriage - a concept I'm not unfamiliar with, having "grown up" in BDSM circles throughout my sexual awakening, but not something I ever thought I'd find myself in.

I think one of the most devastating realizations any woman can have is the fact that her man is cheating on her; I can't fully describe with words how soul crushing it is. The hard part is coming to the understanding that he really does love you, but that you're not enough and never will be. How do you not take something like that personal?

The first time I found out, he promised me upside down and sideways it would never happen again. We went to marriage counseling. We did everything we were supposed to do to shore up our relationship and move on. And we did! Until I started noticing those little subtleties again about a year later. This time, I was just pissed.

What was I going to do? Leaving and losing half my family was not an option, but I've always thought those women who "stayed for the " were complete idiots. You can't ever understand someone's reasoning until you find yourself in their situation. And here I was - about to stay solely for my . After several very tense weeks, my husband and I finally had one hell of a come to Jesus meeting where he disclosed everything - and I do mean everything - from start to finish.

Throughout the conversation, I realized something that in truth I'd always known; I'm just not enough for him. He absolutely loves me, he's an amazing father, he's my best friend, and I don't want to ever be married to someone else - but he has an itch that I just can't scratch....and strangely enough, I'm perfectly okay with that. In fact, I don't want to scratch that itch! So, what next?

To me, having been involved in the BDSM lifestyle the better part of my life, the answer was obvious; we needed to open our marriage. I naively believed this would be an easy, natural transition. And for me, the first time he went to go meet someone, it was. For him, not so much. It's been rough, to say the very least.

There are so many emotions that go along with this that somehow, I never knew existed. Jealousy, anger, unease, happiness, etc., are all part and parcel with what I've signed up for. What surprised me was that they're on HIS end, not mine. Now granted, I'm not dumb enough to believe I'll never have those feelings, but for right now I'm kind of reveling in the fact that we've found a singular area of our lives where my compartmentalization skills are better than his.

This is going to be a wonderful journey if we play our cards right, and I'm very excited for what the future holds. Openness, communication, trust, honesty, and a lot of love - that's the relationship I signed up for and it's the one we're working so hard at achieving now.
3 Comments

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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
The Lost Art of Flirting (4)positively4you
Jan 19, 2021 7:44 pm
What is a BBW? (8)Looking4FWB6258
Oct 16, 2020 7:14 pm
3 months in... (2)BardisBi
Apr 10, 2020 11:47 am
Our busy life (4)ClandestineFun20
Apr 6, 2020 6:51 pm
The Beginning (5)gootman4u
May 29, 2018 8:10 pm